The Oklahoma Daily (Norman, Okla.), Vol. 83, No. 83, Ed. 1 Wednesday, January 13, 1999 Page: 4 of 14
This newspaper is part of the collection entitled: University of Oklahoma Student Newspapers and was provided to The Gateway to Oklahoma History by the Carl Albert Congressional Research and Studies Center.
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The Oklahoma Daily
What's your opinion? CALL 325-5179
AESHA RASHEED OPINION EDITOR
4
I ‘Under the First Amendment there is no such thing as a false idea. However pernicious an opinion may seem, we depend for its correction not on the conscience ofjudges and juries hut on the competition of other ideas." | JUSTICE LEWS POWFIL. 1974 |
■ OURVIEW
■ JOLIET AND MARQUETTE
by Shane Swmnea
ubth
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■ STAFFCOLUMN
Good help is hard to find
V
I!
■ STAFFCOLUMN
Livingston set good example
I
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I
Travis LeBlanc is a history and journalism senior
i ItaE Oklahoma Daily
Contact us: 149-A Copeland Hall; 860 Van Vleet Oval Norman, Okla.73019—0270; phone: (405) 325-2521 e-mail: editor@daily.ou.edu
Jack Willi*
Editorial Advlauw
I
i
Wednesday, Jan. 13, 1999
editorials / page 4
r<a»j
T H E
INDEPENDENT
STUDENT
VOICE
UNIVERSITY
0 F
T H E
0 F
OKLAHOMA
Ku.i»3
The Univmity of Oklahoma in tn Lqusl
Opportunity Institution
You're not a hero, Mr.
President. And... any
time you agree to play
a game, you agree to
play it by the rules.
Ex-glam rock band stars can’t fol-
low directions and make lousy inte-
rior decorators.
the hil^e
Travis
LeBlanc
but taking money from higher education to help the oil
industry is unacceptable. If money must be cut the state
legislature must find other places to squeeze budgets.
We urge state legislators to remember how important
education is Educated people will be better prepared to
predict and stop future crises like the petroleum surplus,
so we won't be in this position again
We also urge students to make their voices heard.
This issue affects you It is your education that may be
sacrificed Even though the budget won't be set for sev-
eral months, it is never too early to start expressing your
views. Write to your representatives. Organize a trip to
the capitol Speak out.
Thursdaybfeature
Daily columnist Johan Wanstrom
throws his support behind
Elizabeth Dole in 2000.
Adam Muchmore is a letters and polit-
ical science junior
Member Associated Press. Associated
uonegiate rress. UKianoma Press Association
and Society of Newspaper Design
MUM M not I Mutually
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nt Ohlthtat Daily is printed by the
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throutfi fhundays m 127 Copeland Hall
the Democratic side of the
House, soon becoming calls of
“You Resign! You Resign!”
Livingston waited for the
commotion to die down, then
continued.
“And I can only challenge you
in such fashion if I am willing to
heed my own words ... So I
must set the example that I
hope President Clinton will fol-
low. I will not stand for speaker
of the House on Jan. 6.”
Bob Livingston didn’t deserve
what happened to him.
'V;
”l‘1‘A‘l Publiiaium
Don’t call it a comeback because in the hearts
and minds of my adoring fans I never left. But
TYavis LeBlanc has once again returned to the
pages of The Oklahoma Daily.
Many have asked me what I have been doing and
where I have been since I last
wrote on these pages. More
importantly, how did ol’ Trav
spend the holiday season?
Sadly, I had to spend most of
the Christmas break cleaning
up after a drunken rampage
that I went on in my house.
I spent most of last semester
traveling. While I was gone, I
had left specific instructions
to my servantry for the reno-
vation of my Edmond estate, Le Chateau d’Amour.
When I returned from my extensive travels
abroad in mid-December, I hoped that I would be
able to have some peace and relaxation.
I had no such luck.
I walked through the door of my house for the
first time in many months and David Lee Roth, for-
mer lead singer of Van Halen but now employed as
my personal butler, bowed and took my coat.
“Good evening, sir," Dave politely said.
“Have the changes been made as I ordered?” I
asked. “Yes, sir!" he replied.
“Well see about that.” I said, clapping my hands
twice. “Kip, where are you? Come here now!”
I heard the racing of footsteps and suddenly
appeared Kip Winger, former bassist and vocalist of
cheese metal group Winger, (of “She’s Only
Seventeen” fame) whose music career quickly van-
ished, forcing him to seek new employment as my
resident interior decorator.
“What is it?” the out-of-breath Kip blurted out.
My face filled with rage and 1 backhanded the blond
pretty boy’s face, sending him tumbling to the floor.
“You are to address me as ‘sir’ at all times! I leave
for a few months and suddenly you start to think
that you're a rock star again! Now get up and show
me the changes you have made in my absence.”
“Yes, sir,” Kip said, wiping the blood off his lip.
We strolled though my estate and I saw the nice
improvements. As I had strictly ordered, mirrors
were installed on the ceiling, shag carpet set all
over, lava lamps strategically placed, my 1970s
quadraphonic sound system installed — but I was
most displeased upon arriving in my bedroom.
“What is this on my bed? Pink satin sheets? I
specifically asked for lavender!” I screamed.
1 cocked my hand back to slap Kip once again.
“B- b- but sir," he wimpered. “You assigned the buy-
ing of bedsheets to Brett.”
1 walked downstairs grumbling curse words on
the way and entered my back yard where I saw my
pool sweeper Brett Michaels and my chief gardener
anything,
you would
like to say
to Monica
Lewinsky at
this
minute.”
Clinton
stopped,
looked down for a moment, try-
ing desperately to keep from
grinning, and simply answered,
“That’s good.” The entire crowd
quite good at winning during the
last 3 decades, now it’s time to
show the world you can lose
with honor too.
But if you won’t take repre-
sentative Livingston’s advice,
Mr. President, maybe you’ll stop
and listen to someone else.
Perhaps you remember a
young law professor at the
University of Arkansas who
spoke to the Arkansas Gazette
Aug. 8, 1974.
This young professor was
running against U.S.
Representative John Paul
Hammershmidt for a
Congressional seat in Arkansas.
While Representative
Hammershmidt was not con-
vinced that President Nixon’s
actions were impeachable, the
young law professor explained
that there is “no question that
an admis-
sion of
making
false
state-
ments to
govern-
ment offi-
cials ...
is an
impeach-
able
offense.”
The young professor stated that
he thinks “it’s plain that the presi-
dent should resign and spare the
country the agony of this impeach-
ment and removal proceeding."
The young professor continued,
adding that he thought that “the
country could be spared a lot of
agony and the government could
worry about inflation and a lot of
other problems if he’d go on and
resign.”
You guessed it.
This young law professor’s
name was William Jefferson
Clinton.
President Clinton
should heed his own
advice and resign from
office.
Amid all the accusations,
hype, and repetition of the
impeach-
___ 1 ment
one
moment
stood out
as nobler
than all
the rest.
On Dec.
19,
Adam
Muchmore Speaker-
SMMHBMHHHI Elect Bob
Livingston
Li i >'
Speak up
The Oklahoma State Regents for Higher Education
asked our state legislature to give more funds to higher
education. The regents asked for $107.1 million in new
funds to improve Oklahoma institutions
We urge the state legislators to grant the regents'
request. If Oklahoma is to become a key player in nation-
al politics we must become a well-educated state We
must let it be known that we are serious about our edu-
cation system from kindergarten to college
The current petroleum surplus is a potentially serious
blow to our economy. Already, oil companies have had to
lay off employees and cut back hiring.
We sympathize with those affected by the oil surplus
NewsroomDirectory Slrf .’.a.-. , Mid IUMM1 (^.u, „n Um, ,u,t
Hannah Allsm Editor Alice Ospovat
Seth Prince Managing Editor Paul Dryden
Claudia King Night Editor Janine Butler
Steve DeLeon
CC Deville, the former singer and guitarist respec-
tively of glam rock band Poison, whose rapid decline
brought them under my employment for extra cash.
“Brett, come stand right in front of me. About 4
feet away, if you will. And, Mr. Deville, would you
mind blindfolding Brett for me?”
“Yes, sir!” they both said. Michaels came forth
and Deville blindfolded Michaels with one of those
ridiculous scarves he wears. I stepped back a few
paces and then ran forward before kicking Michaels
square in the pills.
“Argh!!!” he screamed, falling to the ground.
Deville looked at Brett rolling on the grass in agony.
“What did you do that for?” Deville asked.
I gave him a stem look. “Are you questioning
me?” I responded. “Uh ... no sir!” he said, cowering
in fear.
The doorbell rang and I ran back inside to
answer. I opened the door and saw Ian Brown, the
one-time lead singer of the Stone Roses. He spoke in
his barely comprehensible Mancunian accent: “Hey
mate, you need a lawn guy?"
“Sorry, Ian," I said, “I only hire washed-up
American cheese-metal musicians from the mid-
’80s. You’re looking for Bob Bowers. He hires all the
washed-up British alternative-pop musicians from
the early *908.”
I was getting pretty stressed. I went to my
kitchen where my personal cook and dietitian,
Warren DiMartini, better known for once being the
lead guitarist of Ratt (of “Round and Round” fame)
until the recession took his fortune and he looked to
me for financial assistance.
I had him pour me a glass of wine so that I could
try to relax.
“Oh well. So I got the wrong sheets,” I said to
Dave the butler. “My whole house could be in ruin,
but if the hot tub room is OK, then I am a happy
man. Come, Mr. Roth, let’s go inspect the hot tub.”
We entered the hot tub room only to discover
that the heart-shaped jacuzzi I ordered was
installed completely wrong. I made clear directions
that the point of the heart was to face southeast.
Instead the point was facing due south.
1 lost my temper as I never had before. This was
when my drunken rampage began. I don’t remem-
ber much after that. I do remember that I personal-
ly flogged all my servants until I could flog no more
and then had my butler Dave continue the flogging.
I went from room to room smashing all my pos-
sessions and attacking any musician who got in my
way. One police report claims that I beat Warrant
singer Jani Lane (of “Cherry Pie” fame) over the
head while yelling, “How does it feel to have a musi-
cal instrument smash you for a change!”
When I came to my senses, all my servants had
fled in terror except my trusty butler, Dave.
“Mr. Roth,” I said, trying to fish for the right
words through my terrible hangover, “I am not an
unreasonable man, am I?” Dave shook his head.
“Well then,” I said. “Let’s go shopping!”
This is how I spent my Christmas break.
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Editor
Managing Editor
Night Editor
Marianne Kerber Aaatotant Managing Editor
Aesha Rasheed Opinion Editor
Jttinea Royal Sport* Idhor
Yes, he did “stray from (his)
marriage,” which was definitely
an act of his choosing.
But he did not do so in the
oval office with a young, subor-
dinate employee.
More importantly, he did not
lie about it under oath. And he
firmly believed that the best
interest of America was more
important than the best interest
of Bob Livingston.
One of the moments that
sealed Clinton’s feelings on
these matters most poignantly
occurred at a press conference
on Feb. 6.
CNN Senior White House
Correspondent Wolf Blitzer
stood up and asked, “Mr.
President, Monica Lewinsky’s
life has been changed forever,
stood up to address the U.S. her family’s life has been
House of Representatives. changed forever, I wonder how
“To the president, I would say, you feel
sir, you have done great damage about that
to this nation over this past year and what, if
and while your defenders are
contending that further
impeachment proceedings would
only protract and exacerbate the
damage to this country, I say
that you have the power to ter-
minate that damage and heal
the wounds that you have creat-
ed.”
Livingston paused for a
moment, and took a breath.
“You sir, may resign your
post.”
A chorus of boos erupted from broke out laughing.
Yes, Mr. President. Politics is
a game.
Maybe you didn’t learn it at
Georgetown, Oxford or Yale, but
I’m sure you can remember
something about honor and fair
play from your days in elemen-
tary school.
You’re not a hero, Mr.
President. And you’re smart
enough to know that any time
you agree to play a game you
agree to play it by the rules.
This time though, you lost.
You’ve proved yourself to be
1
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Allam, Heather. The Oklahoma Daily (Norman, Okla.), Vol. 83, No. 83, Ed. 1 Wednesday, January 13, 1999, newspaper, January 13, 1999; Norman, Oklahoma. (https://gateway.okhistory.org/ark:/67531/metadc1820572/m1/4/?q=%22Education+-+Colleges+and+Universities+-+Faculty+and+Staff%22: accessed July 10, 2024), The Gateway to Oklahoma History, https://gateway.okhistory.org; crediting Carl Albert Congressional Research and Studies Center.