The Granite Enterprise. (Granite, Okla.), Vol. 10, No. 18, Ed. 1 Friday, September 17, 1909 Page: 4 of 10
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TO THE LADIES OF GRANITE:
You are cordially invited to attend our
opening of millinery
fall
| Staggers Comprehension
Secretary Wilson of the De-
partment of Agriculture has
been giving out some crop proph-1
eeies lately that might be!
thought to belong to the realm of
] fancy or imagination if they w ere
not ko thoroughly backed up by
what are known to be*facts- and
if a substantial measure of reli-
Saturday, Sept. 18
where we will have on display all of the latest
creations from the fashion world for your
inspection and approval. A ticket will be
presented to each lady making a purchase, and
the one holding the correct number will be
entitled to
$5.00 in Gold
WERE NO MATCH FOR EAGLE
Trio of Vultures Completely Routed In
Conflict with Monarch of
the Air.
From the Rookies comes a story
about three vultures that attacks) an
eagle in his nest on a mountain
peak. Although attacked from three
points, the king of birds gallantly
ability did not attach to any word ! '"'1J lrt8 owu auJ 8'ew lwo °' l'ie
of the head of the Debartment NU™!ire9*
Jof Agricultureon the subject of J hemanner ™. whlcQb. tf(,e ^
'crous was fet'll'iar- Singling out
., , , . one °f I*16 attacking birds, he
, lie predicts that the crops, this ?raspod it tightly by (he neck> bury.
year will break the record. jng his talons deeply in the flesh, and
When it is remembered that then, rising almost perpendicularly
|the value of the crops produced) for about a hundred feet, allowed his
j last year reached the huge to*al prisoner, then pretty weil choked, to
Jof $7,778,000,000 it will be seen ^rop on the rot'is h«low in a stunned
jthat one must almost go into the' "Edition.
sphere of higher mathematics to
We will be located for the season in the
Schave furniture store. Your patronage
earnestly solicited. Satisfaction in every way
guaranteed.
Yours to please,
MRS. E. R. TINSLEY,
MISS JESSIE HALL.
figure out what the Secretary is
talking about.
His statement means that this
year's crops will approach cicely
to the value of eight billions of
, dollars.
Such a sum ic too vast for com-
• prehension.
J It is four times the product of
! the mines, including gold, silver
and all precious metais and min-
eral oil.
The value of the corn crop
alone last year was $1,615,000,
000.
What an enormous sum this is, j
is better understood by the state-
ment it would pay the interest-
bearing debt of the United States,
would pay fo*- the Panama Canal
and would construct fifty battle-
ships of the dreadnought variety.
And corn is but one of the gre.it
crops of the American farm.
Go to Kennedy'# Restaurant
for a good lunch or meal.
Two falls served to kill the first
victim, but three were required to
knock out the second.
The survivor, seeing the fate of
his companions; turned tail and flew
down the mountain side, uttering
shrill cries as it flew.
SEED! SEED! SEED!
Wheat, Rye, Oats,
Millet;
ail strictly choice recleaned
seeds of the best quality.
Granite Grain Co;
GIRL'S TOBACCO CROP.
An example of thrift and inde-
pendence coines from the Knob sec-
tion, says the Franklin (Ky.) Fa-
vorite. The three young daughters
of Samuel II. Ragland, a prosperous
and well-to-do land owner of that
section, conceived the idea of earn-
ing pin money for themselves, and
accordingly secured permission from
their father to raise a tobacco crop
of their own.
With the exception of breaking
the land the three young ladies,
Hisses Elma, Idell and Annie Rag-
land, raised the crop entirely un-
aided. They accomplished the work
solely from a wish to be independent
and self-sustaining.
BALD HEADS.
HUMOR IN NEW YORK SENATE
Proof That Legislators of the Empire
•tat* Find Time for a Little
Merry Repartee.
When Senator ILll's bill, which is
designed to prevent "joy riding,"
waa being amended in the senate so
that it would not, as originally
drafted, apply its drastic terms to
baby carriages, milk wagons or sim-
ilar conveyances as well as automo-
biles, debate ran high at intervals.
"Dote Senator Urackett own an
automobile ?" demanded Senator
Hinman, interrupting the remarks
of the member from Saratoga.
"Well, I have some sort of an old
machine that wears that name up in
my barn," replied Senator Brackett.
It doesn't amount to much in the
matter of going, but it's mighty
when it comes to running up ex-
pense bills. And I might add that
since I have owned it my power of
walking has been greatly developed."
"Why, this bill," Eaid Senator
C'affrey of New York, during the
same debate, "would make it grand
larceny for anyone to take out a
babv carriage without the owner's
consent."
"Would the senator call a nurse-
maid pushing a baby carriage a
chauffeur?" demanded Senator
Davis.
"I wouldn't call her anything un-
less I knew her," returned Senator
C'affrey. — Albany* Correspondence
New Ycyk Herald. t ,
. * . «•!
See Tinsley & Slaton
Colorado coal; Phone 33.
WRESTLING!
CATCH AS CATCH CAN.
Wednesday
NIGHT,
Sept. 22.
Opera House
Granite, OKIa.
B. PRIDE
"If you care to observe the bald
headed row," remarked the theater
goer, "you will find that there
Alfalfa gieat varie*.T >n bald heads. There
' are elliptical bald spots, circular bald
spots, elongated egg-shaped
spots, bald spots that are almost
square and bald spots whose si
can hardly be described for the rea
son that they include the entire cir
cumference of the head with the ex
ception. perhaps, of a slight row o
finishing fringe between the hea
and the neck. If it wasn't for the
bald heads the theater would be
bore before the rising of the cur
tain."
for
SQUIRREL WHISKY.
Lord Iveagh, the head of Guin
ness' brewery, has a remarkable pre-
scription for whisky which he asserts
was given him by the manufacturer
in Maine.
Take a gallon of wood alcohol, put
in a wine glass of glycerin, then
grind up some plug tobacco and
strain through cheescloth to give
flavor. Add a gallon of water to the
whole and you will have two gallons
of excellent "squirrel" whisky.
I-ord Iveagh adds that he was told
It was called "squirrel" whisky be-
rause it made the drinkers talk nuttv
NOT SO DUSTY.
bLLI MAUL.
BUI Goat—I hear that your eldest
son, Piglins, has done very well for
himself stnee he left home.
Pater Pig—Yes, we feel very proud
of him. He has made a perfect hog of
himself.
STRONG GAME.
VS.
CHIEF MONTOUR, Champin Middleweight of Okla
CHIEFMONTOUR
Of Oklahoma Citv
'At* 'hese aaudwtche* frcshf
Oh. ye*, iir; | dusted the id my
•eSf cLU morning."
Doors open at 8 p.m. Admissian SOr
POKER AND PINK TEAS.
-There ought to be « crusade
j these pink teas," declared
| Jbe red-cheeked man. "They are
absolutely ruining me for a "poker
player. Didn't you know that ? It's
true. Society and pink ten* have
done more to ruin good poker play,
ers than anything else in the citv
of New York."
INHERITED TRAIT.
Yeast—I hear the Weekneee' baby
ia beginning to crawl.
Cr.msonbeak—I'm not surprised
at that.
"Why not?"
I "Why. Wei-knee is the greatest
crawler' you ever saw,"
Cupid and Hymen were talking
about cards.
Ever play yourself?" asked Cu-
pid.
"Sometimes," responded Ilymen,
mtiously.
"Indeed! And what is yoar
Wrongest hand?"
"Oh, when kings find they are
beaten bv queens and turn into
jacks. How about you?"
Cupid laughed a silver laugh.
"Oh, I have a hand that can't
be beat."
"Really? And what is it?"
"Why, a pair in a parlor. Tint
has been a winner since the world
began."
' f it
ONLY ONCE. r
fij
The grass widow was reading Jn
some dismay a letter from a ^uth
who hadn't seen her for two yean.
If you haven't married lately,"
it read, "I should like to take von
out to dinner, if you will g0."
"I think that's mean of him," bHq
said. "I have never married but-
once in Chicago."
HER OBJECT, r : / ^
"Man-, how does it happen that I
caught you feeling that poii.e.nan
last Bight with the warm pie I had
made ?"
I m try in* to discourage him
from pesterin' me, mum."—Ex-
change.
TL' ~~ "—~ * fiM
A ROOTER'S WIFE.
Stella—Why did sho go home to
her mother?
, foll»—ShP heard her hu>banj
talking in his sleep about a woman
named Matty—New York Sun
STAYED.
— sn
Don't you think *he is rather a
staid sort of girl ?"
I know .he |g. my Kisj(.r wi
tN iter, where .he buji her 1JOr.
sets. — I fynstun Poet
* t. - A u
TRAVEL. J*
ir'Z°1 T ,hat inv' n,or'» "''"ship
tra\el«l dear
lee. On i freight car." .
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Charles E. Hill and Sons. The Granite Enterprise. (Granite, Okla.), Vol. 10, No. 18, Ed. 1 Friday, September 17, 1909, newspaper, September 17, 1909; (https://gateway.okhistory.org/ark:/67531/metadc402670/m1/4/: accessed May 9, 2024), The Gateway to Oklahoma History, https://gateway.okhistory.org; crediting Oklahoma Historical Society.