The Express-Star (Chickasha, Okla.), Ed. 1 Monday, February 2, 2004 Page: 7 of 8
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The Born Loser
people, past and present
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Opening lead: V A
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PUZZLES
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2 212
GRAPH
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ASK DR. GOTT
A
OIR
If you would like to contact Dr
Cott, you may write him @ Dr Gott
c/o United Media, 200 Madison
Ave. 4th fl, New York, NY 10016
02004 by NEA ne
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Copyright 2004, Newspaper Enter-
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Copyright 2004, Newspaper Enter-
prise Assn.
Maybe you're simply lonely, but
this doesn't mean that you have
to yearn for what could be con-
sidered to be an abusive relation-
ship You are not a victim now: you
have choices, one of which is to
put the hurt behind you and move
on expand your life, get a job,
become active in your community
and church, establish other friend-
ships — perhaps even intimate
ones with a man who is willing to
let down his guard.
So, rather than emphasizing your
former husband s difficulty with
meaningful communication, look
at your situation as an opportunity
to grow To me, you sound like "a
keeper. Use your unpleasant ex-
perience to make positive changes
If you need counseling to do so,
all the better. The important con-
sideration is for you to move ahead
and not remain stagnant in a pool
of uncertainty and self-incrimina-
tion Thesame would hold true for
your ex-spouse, who may need
some professional guidance about
how to be a more caring partner.
But that is his decision.
i
I
I
Dealer: South
Vulnerable: East West
If East plays the heart eight, it is
high and encouraging. Continue
with the heart king and another
heart.
But when partner drops the dis-
couraging two, he is asking you to
shift Clearly clubs look much more
promising than diamonds. So,
switch to the club nine, the high
card denying an honor in the suit.
Here, partner wins with the jack,
puts you back in with the heart
king, and you play another club to
generate six defensive tricks: three
hearts and three clubs. (Note that
if you continue hearts at trick two,
declarer makes his contract in
spades and diamonds.)
Of course you must be able to trust
your partner to signal correctly. On
this deal, if he would drop the heart
two at trick one. keep him. If he
would play the eight, think about
visiting the transfer market.
An unusual pattern of intimacy
By Peter H. Gott, M D.
DEAR DR. GOTT: I was married for
24 years, during which time my
husband refused to kiss me or
show any affection, but demanded
sex four times a day I finally did
geta divorce: however, I miss him
What do you think was his prob-
lem? He worked and supported me
and three children, but couldn t
talk about anything.
DEAR READER: While I’m not a psy-
chologist or a counselor on sexual
relationships, this is a disconcert
ingly complex problem that, on
the surface, sounds simple.
First, if your former husband held
down a regular job and supported
the family for years. I can t see
how he could have possibly
squeezed sex into his tight sched
ule four times a day. I don’t know
any man who could function at
that level for very long — unless
there were vacation time and pe
riods away from the children —
and. even so. sex approximately
n
o
s
Y
I M 50
BORED . . .
CAN T.. .
STAY. ..
AWAKE
YOUR PROJECT 15
MY TOP PRIORITY.
TELL ME EVERYTHING
THAT I NEED TO
KNOW.
Monday,
February 2, 2004
TsnT THaT THe HOLe
fieM THe DRYeR VP
I HAVEN T
STARTED
TALKING
YET.
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AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 19) — Impor-
tant achievements can be made to-
day. provided you're ready to jump
right in and do what needs doing. If
there's something you want, roll up
your sleeves and go to work on it.
PISCES (Feb. 20-March 20) — Your
luck, energy and drive all have their
limitations today so don t attempt
to push them too far too fast. The
results could end up being counter-
productive and cause unnecessary
delays.
ARIES (March 21 April 19) —Atouch
of humor and feather-light handling
will go much further in dealing with
a domestic situation that arises to-
day Harsh measures will only serve
to create additional problems
TAURUS (April 20-May 20) — Think
before speaking today when dealing
with those with whom you should
be using diplomacy. You might un-
wittingly make a caustic remark
you'd wish you could take back.
GEMINI (May 21-June 20) —look out
for your financial interests today, but
do so in ways that others can't in-
terpret as selfishness. The wrong
kind of attitude could invite losses,
not gains.
CANCER (June 21-July 22) — Take
your breaks where they fall today
instead of waiting for something dif-
ficult to attain to come your way Be
grateful for small favors: the big
ones may take more time.
LEO (July 23-Aug. 22) — Keep your
optimistic spirit intact today and
don't allow negativity to creep into
your affairs or thoughts. Your posi-
tive qualities bring you happiness
when things appear contrary.
VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22) — Old
projects must not be allowed to be
put aside today because of an en-
thusiasm for a new one that pops
up. Finish what you have on the
table so that you ll be able to enjoy
fresh endeavors.
LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct 23)—This could
be one of those days where it might
be advisable to take things a bit
slower than you’d like. Just keep in
mind that as long as you re moving
forward, every step counts.
SCORPIO (Oct. 24-Nov. 22) — Your
faith might be put to the test today
but as long as you hold fast to that
which you believe, all you envision
will eventually work out in ways that
will stand the test of time.
SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 23-Dec. 21) —
Don't ignore the chance you may get
today to speak up about getting
something that you believe you're
entitled to. Once it's gone, you'll
have to live with what presently ex-
ists.
CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19) — Be
careful not to kid yourself into think-
ing that conditions can be further
improved by waiting a bit longer The
postponement of making an impor-
tant decision could cause bigger
headaches
TODAYS Y
THE )
DAY <
MRS. >
GODFREYS
COMING .
EACK y
1 Bikini hall
2 Lecher
3 Pull down
4 Fire-
breathers
5 Old tale
6 Take it easy
7 FBI acronym
8 Open,
as a drain
9 Catch
red-handed
against
22 Use a
whetstone
23 Diet no-no
24 Hwys.
25 Like some
bath rugs
26 Beatty and
Rorem
27 Strong as
aM@
40 Plastic pipe
41 Motel staffer
43 Handed out
46 Adventurer,
often
47 Bedouin
attire
48 Place
50 List detail
51 Mae West
role
52 London
streetcar
53 Army meal
54 Belief
55 Kennel noise
V
)
■ l O Y
UPT H
1 Multiplied
5 Gator Bowl
st.
8 Element
12 Thunder
13 Fine, to an
astronaut
(hyph.)
14 Moonshot
people
15 Faint glow
16 Meadow
sound
17 Hi or bye
18 Swallow up
20 Partner
21 Individual
22 Cable
network
23 Palm leaf
26 Chewy candy
29 Off-road
vehicles
30 Camper’s
need
31 CPA’s forte
33 Orange
pekoe, e.g.
34 Helper
products
40 Church
reading
41 Ration out
42 Hera s son
43 Wading
bird
44 Patrick’s
domain
45 Contract
46 T hat guy
47 The
Greatest"
49 Strike caller
28 Ripped
apart
30 Hawaiian
carving
32 Sorrowful
34 Tart
35 Professors
37 Math
statements
38 RCA
1
West
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Today s due A eq J M
IF THE GKOUNDH06
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PREVIOUS SOLUTION Nobody wn th battle ol the exes
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THeRe’s SIX MoRe WEEKS OF
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U KEEP TABS ON DOLF’S
ACTIVITIES DURING
THE DAY...
Which is the most important card
in a suit? Obviously, the ace. But all
cards are useful. The virtue of the
two — especially on 02/02 — is its
lack of ambiguity
On today's deal, look at the West
hand. South, on your right, opens
one spade. and North raises to two
spades. ending the auction. You
lead the heart ace and inspect the
dummy (North). What would you
do at trick two if partner signals
with (a) the heart eight, or (b) the
heart two?
Some authorities dictate that if
your opponents stop at the two-
level in a known eight-card or bet
ter fit, you must balance. That ad-
e is usually sound. but this West
Hand is so unappealing that only a
knight or a lemming — the choice
2 of noun being dependent upon the
| result — would balance with a take
I out double
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every four hours (assuming he
slept 8 hours) is an enormous
commitment that is way beyond
what men enjoy and accept. (No-
tice here that I use the word
function because women are
different - biologically able to
have sex usually without orgasm,
on many occasions several times
a day । do not choose to pursue
this tack)
Second, I agree that kissing and
closeness are a vital part of any
intimate relationship. I don't know
why your ex husband had diffi-
culty in this area. Perhaps as you
implied he was simply unable to
share his feelings for fear of be-
ing hurt i m just hypothesizing.
Third, I encourage you to disre-
gard his problem and focus on
your own From the sound of your
letter (which I have edited), you
seem to be a mature, well-
rounded. sensitive, intelligent
mother, who for years put up with
a situation that you found dis-
tasteful Why? For the children?
Did you consider counseling? Did
you ever put your foot down?
Then you tell me you miss your ex-
husband? C mon, you need to add
some perspective to your life.
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Bush, Kent. The Express-Star (Chickasha, Okla.), Ed. 1 Monday, February 2, 2004, newspaper, February 2, 2004; Chickasha, Oklahoma. (https://gateway.okhistory.org/ark:/67531/metadc1886703/m1/7/?q=%22%22~1&rotate=90: accessed July 17, 2024), The Gateway to Oklahoma History, https://gateway.okhistory.org; crediting Oklahoma Historical Society.