The Hennessey Clipper. (Hennessey, Okla.), Vol. 16, No. 49, Ed. 1 Thursday, May 3, 1906 Page: 2 of 9
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P>■%** /■ ■■■ ./ W— • ™ '■
y
Hennessey Clipper
HENNESSEY, OKLAUOMA
r H. MILLER. • • PxiblUhe"
CASEY'S REVENGE.
.BY GRANTLAND RICE.
There were naddened hearts In Mudvlllo
for a week or even more;
There were muttered oaths and curses—
every fan In town was sore;
"Just think," said one, "how soft it looked
wilii <:aa«y at the bat.
And then to think he'd go and spring a bush
league trlek like that."
All his past fame was forgotten—lie was
now a hopeless "shine"—
They called him "Strike-Out Casey" from
the Mayor down the line.
And as he came to hat each day his bosom
Waved a sigh,
While a look of hopeless fury shone In
mighty Casey's eye.
He pondered In the days gone by that he
had been their king;
That when he strolled up to the plate they
made the welkin ring;
Kut now his nerve had vanished—for when
he heard them hoot,
Jle "fanned" or "popper out" dally, like
some minor league recruit. •
He soon began t >sulk and loaf—Ills butting
eye went lame;
No home runs on the score card now were
chalked against his name;
The fans without exception give the man-
ager no peace.
For one and all kept « lainoring f« r Case> *
quick release.
The mud\ iiie aqua* began to aim l
team was in the a.r.
Their playing went from bad to worse—no-
body seemed to care.
-Back to the WMdS with CMV" as
t ry from Rooter's Row.
"Get some one who can hit the ball and let
that big dub '
The lane is long, some one has said, that
never turns again,
And Fate, though fickle, often gives an-
other chance to men;
And Casey smiled—his rugged face no long-
er wore a frown—
The pitcher who had started all the trouble
came to town.
All Mudvllle had assembled—ten thousand
fans had come
To see the twlrler who had put big Casey
on the bum;
And when In* stepped Into the box the multi-
tude went wild,
He doffed his cap in proud disdain—but
Casey only smiled.
"Play ball!" the umpire's voice rang out—
and then the game began;
But In that throng of thousands there was
not a single fan
Who thought that Mudvllle had a chance,
and with the setting sun
Their hopes sank low—the rival team was
leading four to one.
The last half of the ninth came 'round,
with no change In the score.
But when the first man up hit safe the
crowd began to roar;
The din Increased- the echo of ten thousand
shouts was lifeard
When the pitcher hit the Hecond and gave
four balls to the third.
Three men on base—nobody out three runs
to tie the game!
A triple meant the highest niche In Mud-
vllle's hall of fame;
But here the rally ended and the gloom was
deep as night,
When No. 4 fouled to catcher and 5 flew out
to right.
A dismal groan In chorus came—a scowl
was on each face-
When Casey walked up, bat In hand, and
slowly took his place;
His bloodshot eyes in fury gleamed—his
teeth were clenched In hate,
He gave his cap a vicious hook and pounded
on the plate.
But fame Is fleeting as the wind and glory
fades away;
There were no wild and woolly cheers no
glad acclaim this day;
They hissed and groaned and hooted as
they clamored: "Strike him out!"
But Casey gave no outward sign that he
had heard this shout.
The pitcher smiled ami cut one loose-
across the plate It sped—
Another hiss—another groan "STRIKK
ONE!" the umpire said;
Zip! Like a shot tlie second curve broke
just below ins knea
"STRIKE TWO!" the umpire roared
aloud—but Casey made no plea.
No roasting for the umpire now -his was an
easy lot;
But#here the pitcher whirled again—was
that a rifle shot?
A whack—a crack- and out through space
the leather pellet flew
A blot against the distant sky—a speck
against the blue.
Above the fence In center field ill rapid
whirling flight
The sphere sailed on—the blot grew dim and
then was last to sight,
Ten thousand hats were thrown In air-
ten thousand threw a tit
But no or< - ever found the ball that mighty
Casey hit.
Oh, som. where in this fayored land dark
clouds may hide the sun;
And somewhere bands no longer play and
children have no fun ;
And somewhere over blighted II"*? there
DOWN IN A SUBMARINE.
There's a charm that Is hidden,
That none but we know—
Down in a submarine.
Though loudly the blasts on the surface
may blow,
No ripple Is felt In our path here below-
Down in a submarine.
The lightning may rend and the hurri-
cane sweep
While quietly down in the depths lu re w
English, if ybu ran.
"1 w ill. The special act of the assem-
bly is void; therefore there was no le-
i al election, and, by consequence, there
i : no judge and no receiver."
Miss Van Brock was silent for a re-
Then she said:
thought, perhaps, you
And
sleep,
mon
peep
Khali rise and so silently
•udly.
At the battleships sailing o
Then, quick to the turn, we are after our
prey;
Our battles are won in a sub-rosa way,
One little torpedo went out wins the day.
We hear the report, but not loudly.
Perchance wo are struck
In the fathoms below-
Down in a submarine.
Our exit from earth would be quiet, we
know,
Ensconced In our casket, we're ready to
go-
Down In a submarine.
For go we ull must, nt the one, proper
time.
While you go prosaic, we go sub-lime,
(You go In prose and we go in rhyme).
And we're ready when fate shall enthrall
| the door, what could you say for your-! "Oh. please don't quote law hook#
self?" she began, before he could say i at me. it in English—woman-
u word in exculpation. I English, if yi.
"1 nhould say every sort of excuse-
ful thing 1 could think of, knowing
very well lhat the most ingenious
lie would fall far short of atoning for
the offense," he replied humbly.
"Possibly it would be better to tell liective minute
the truth -had you thought of that?" ; "On second
fhe suggested, quite without malice, would better tell me what the eonsli-
"Yes, I had; and I shall, if you'll tution says. Mr. David. Possibly I
let me begin back a bit." He drew up could grasp it."
a chair to face her and sat on the "It is in the section on elections,
edge of It. "You «know I told you I I says: 'All circuit or district judges,
was roing to Gaston to sell my six and all special judges, shall be elected
J lots while Major Guilford's little boom ; by the qualified voters of the respec-
ts on?" | tive circuits or districts in which they
"I'm trying to remember: go on "I are to hold their court.' Kiowa coun-
"Wcll, 1 wont yesterday morning ! ty was cut out of Judge Whitconib's
and returned late last night. Do you
know, it's positively marvelous!"
"Which the six lots, the boom.
or the celerity of your movements?"
she asked with a simulation of deepest
interest.
"All three, if you please; but I
circuit and placed in Judge MacFar-
lane's for electoral purposes only. In
all other respects it remains a part of
Judge'Whitconib's circuit, and will so
continue until Whitcomb's term ex-
pires. Without the vote of Kiowa,
MacFarlane could not have been elect-
meant the miraculous revival of things *'(1 with it he was illegally elected,
The
III
mermaids
smile.
ve Join In the dai
style.
w. II rest In the h
while.
"Till the trumpet of O
-Frederick T Rudlgc
ord-Herald.
elcome
nil with a
n submartn*
THE
GRAFTERS
By
FRANCIS LYNDE
CHAPTER XIV.
Till J G KKKYMA NDEH.
With Judge Marston's hint partly
to point the way. Kent was no long
time in getting at work on the new
lead.
Having been at the time a practi-
tioner in one of the counties affected
he Knew the political deal by which
MacFarlane had been elected. Briefly
described, it was a swapping of horses
in midstream. In the preliminary
canvass it was discovered that in all
probability Judge MacFarlane's dis-
trict. as constituted, would not re-
elect him. But the adjoining district
was strong enough to spare a county
without loss to the party; and that
county added to MacFarlane's voting
strength would tip the scale in his
favor. The assembly was in session
and the remedy applied in the shape
ol a bill re-adjusting the district lines
to fit the political necessity.
While this bill was still in the lower
house an obstacle presented itself ii
the form of a vigorous protest front
Judge Whitcomb, whose district was
• he one to suff°r the loss. The county
in question was a prosperous one. and
ilie court fees— \yhich a compliant clerk
might secretly'divide with the judge
appointing him—were large: where-
fore Whitcomb threatened political re-
prisals if Kiowa county should be '•! -
en away from him. The outcome was
a compromise. Foi elective purposes
the two districts were gerrymandered
as the bill proposed: but it was ex
presslv provided that the transferred
county should remain judicially in
Whitcomb's district until the expira-
tion of Whitcomb's term of office.
Having refreshed his memory as to
the facts. Kent spent a forenoon in the
state library. Ht stayed on past the
luncheon hour, feeding on a dry die:
of digests; and it was not until hun-
ger began to sharpen his faculties that
he thought of going back of the statu-
tory law to tiie fountain-head in the
constitution of the state. H
along the Trans-Western. But that is
neither her nor there—"
"I think' it is very much here and
there," she interrupted.
• see you don't want me to tell the
truth—the whole truth; but I am de-
termined The first man 1 met after |
dinner was Hunnicott, and when I
mane him mv broker in the real es-
aftAir we fell to talking about
I ■ Ml Speaking of Mac-
Fa *r.<• s continued absence, Hunnl-
... sv.-. jokingly, that it was a pity
t k to the methods
;> few hundred years ago and hire
the Hot Springs doctor to 'obliterate'
him. The word stuck in my mind,
I and I broke away and took the train
I chiefly to ha\e a chance to think out
the new line. In the smoking-room
of the sleeper 1 found—whom, do you
suppose?"
"Oh, I don't know: Judge MacFar-
lane, perhaps, coming back to give you
a chance to poison him at short
range?"
"No; it was .Marston."
"And he talked so long and so fast
that you couldn't get here in time for
dinner this evening? That would be
the most picturesque of the little fic-
tions you spoke of."
Kent laughed.
"For the first hour he wouldn't talk
at all; just sat there wooden-faced,
smoking vile little cigars that made
or, to put it the other way about, he
was not elected at all. Since he is not
lawfully a judge, his acts are void,
among them this appointment of Major
Guilford as receiver for the Trans-
Western."
She was not as enthusiastic as he
thought she ought to lie. In the soil
prepared for it by the political confi-
dences of the winter there had grown
up a many-branching tree of inti-
macy between these two; a frank, sex-
less friendship, as Kent would have de-
scribed it. in which a man who was
not very much given to free speech
with any one unburdened himself, and
the woman made him believe that her
quick, apprehending sympathy was the
one thing needful—as women have
done since the world began.
"What is the matter with it?" he
demanded, when he had given her five
full minutes for reflection.
"I don't know, David," she said
gravely. "Have I ever thrown cold
water on any of your schemes thus
far?"
"No, indeed. You have been the loy-
alest partisan a man ever had, I think,
the only one I have "to whom I can
talk freely. And I have told you more
than I have all the others put togeth-
er."
CAN'T STRAIGHTEN UP.
Kidney Trouble Causes Weak Backs,
and a Multitude of Fains
and Achcs.
Col. R. S. Hart Hon. Deputy Mar-
thai, 716 Common S Lake Charles,
La., sav3: "A klcti
from a horse first
weakened my back
and a .Tec-ted my kid-
neys. I became very
bad, and had 10 g>
atout on crutches.
The doctors told me
I had a case of
chronic rheuma-
tism, but I could
was pur- j - not believe them,
chased at 57, and it is now down to i nd finally began using Doan's Kld-
21." j ney Pills for my kidneys. First the
"Twenty and a quarter to-day," 'kidney secretions came iroro fr ely.
Kent corrected. then the pain loft my back. 1 w;nt
"Never mind the fractions. The and got sno:her box, and that ioil-
mother of the incomparable—Penelope, ; pleied a cure. 1 have been well for
has heard that I am a famous business ! two years."
woman; a worthy understudy of Mrs. | Sold by all dealers, 50 cents a box.
Hetty Green; so the came to me for | Foster-Mllburn Co., Buffalo, N. Y.
advice. She had a letter from a New 1
York broker offering her a fraction Senator Tillman's Tip.
more than the market price for her | Sena, T11Imnn nf South Carolina.
* m T t°rn ' adfl''- I " ■ gained a reputation as a race
Well? said Kent.
"Do you know who Mr. Falkland
is?"
"Who doesn't?" he queried." "He has
half of Wall street in his clientele."
"Yes; but particularly lie is the ad-
visory counsel of the Plantagould sys-
tem. Ever since you showed me that
letter 1 have been trying tc account
for his presence in Gaston on the day
before Judge MacFarlane's spring term
of court. I should never have found
out but for Mrs. Brentwood."
"Mrs. Brentwood!"
Miss Van Brock nodded.
"Yes; the mother of my—of tha
young person for w'hom I am the al-
ternative. is in a peck of trouble; I
quote her verbatim. She and her two
daughters hold some 3,000 shares of
Western Pacific stock. It was pur- I
"Meaning what did I do? I did
what you did not do—what you are
not doing even now; I. put two and
two together in the twinkling of
horse tipster and his "one best bet"
went through yesterday at Benning.
The senator is unconscious of having
picked the winner of the third race.
bedstaff. Why should a New York ' bllt he dld- am ,lred of a" this
broker be picking up outlying West- | bocus Pocus," <he senator declared in
m.
m
•i t«-v."-iff*
OF
DAVID
YOU."
I'M PROUD
me think I was getting hay-fever. But
I wouldn't give up; and after I had
worn out all the commonplaces I began
on the Trans-Western muddle. At that
he woke up all at once, and before 1
knew it he was giving mc an expert
leral opinion cm the case; meaty and
sound and judicial. Miss Van Brock,
that man is a lawyer, and an exceed-
ingly able one. at that."
"Of course," she said coolly. "He
was one of the justices of the supreme
court of his own state at 42' that was
before he had Come west for his health.
I found that out a long time ago."
\ y i
Hut Mi.dvilh- )••• ii ts arc h.ipi'y iiow 1-VK
CASKY HIT THKtBALL.
—Cleveland News.
BIBLE CLASS AD. HELPS.
Attendance L:\tjely Increased in
Knoxville, Tern., Church by
Novel Means.
Knoxville. Tenn That a page ad."
in a Sunday m« ipapt will in rei •
tie attendance of tli young men's
Bible class has been proven in t hi -
city by O. P. Sterling and Kev. \V T.
Rodgers, pastor of the First Cumber-
land Presbyterian church.
The attendance at the church Bible
class was not as large as desired and
it was decided to try newspaper ad
vertlsing to draw a crowd On a re-
cent Sunday a novel ad\ertisement
appeared and attracted no little atten-
tion and comment.
All week the ad. got in its work
and its practical results were no-
tleeable the following Sunday morn-
ing.
The membership lti the week in
crease! one-third and scores of in
quirles have been made to the church
officials about the class and many
young men have promised to attend.
The officials Fay that no money ever
was spent mere advantageously by
the church.
And you never told me!" . ;tid Kent,
after I reproachfully. "Well, no matter; I
he had read carefully section by section ! found out for myself that he is a man
almost through the entire instrument, j to tie to. After we had canvassed the
his eye lighted upon a clause which purely legal side of the affair, he
gradually grew luminous as he read
and re-read it.
"That is what Martfon meant: it
must be what he meant," he mused:
and returning the book to its niche
in the alcove he sat down to put
his face in his hands and sunt up the
status in logical sequence.
The conclusion must have-been con-
vincing. sine he presently sprang up
and left the room quickly to have
himself shot down the elevator shaft
t<< the street level. The telegraph of-
iiwas do; i d, but there was another
in the Hotel Brunswick, two squai\
di. tant. and thither he went.
Hold the pool in fighting trim at
all hazards. Think 1 have found
weak link in the chain," was his viz-
ir ■ to Loring «'tt Boston; and having
smt it, he went around to Cassatti's
and a mnMied the waiter by < rder-
in- a hearty luncheon at half-past
three o'clock in the afternoon.
It was late in the evening before h?
left the tiny office on the fifth floor of
t he Quint a rd building where one of his injte.' I began to say that MacFar-
lonner stenographers had set up busi- lane's removal wouldn't help us bo long
?■ iss ior hersell. Since live o'clock the ( as Bucks has the appointing of his
yo ng woman had been steadily drlv-1 successor, and then he turned on me
ing the type-writer to Kent's dictation and hammered it in with a last word
wanted to know more, and I went in
for <letails. telling him all the infer-
ences which involve Bucks. Meigs.
Hendricks, MacFarlane and the lot of
them."
Miss Portia's lyes were flashing.
"Good, good, good!" she said. "Da-
vid. I'm proud of you. That took cour-
age—heaps of it."
"I did have to forget pretty hard
that he v.as the lieutenant-governor
r.nd nominally one of the gang. But if
! is not with us. neither is he against
i: He took it all quietly, and when 1
v.as through, l.esaid: 'You have told
in- nine things that I kn nv, and some
( 1 e.v that I only suspected.'"
Was that all?" asked Miss Van
1 ■! • a. eagerly.
No; 1 tool: a good long breath and
; l ed his advice."
"Did he give it?"
"He did. II.* said in sober earnest
just what Hunnicott had said in a
j'i• . : 'it 1 had your case to fight. 1
should try to obliterate Judge MacFar-
When the final sheet came out with a
whirring rasp of the ratchet, lie sud-
denly remembered that he had prom-
ised Miss Van Brock to dine with her.
It was too late for the dinner, but not
too late to go and apologize, and he i Portia. "I haven't
id U" thing that he could, stopping what it is all about,
just as we were leaving the train: 'I
didn't say remove; 1 said obliterate.'
I caught on. after so long a time, and
I'v • been hard at work ever since."
You are obliterating me," said Miss
the slightest id-?a
at his rooms on the way to dress while
his cab-driver waited.
lie round Portia alone, for which he
was glad: but her greeting was dis-
tinctively accusative.
"If I shoulcl pretend to be deeply of-
fended am tell Thomas to show you
"I know you have. And it hurts me
to pull back now when you want me
to push. But I can't help it. Do you
brieve in a woman's intuition?"
I suppose I do: all men do. don't
they?"
She was tying little knots in the
fringe of the table scarf, but the
prophetess-eyes, as Penelope called
them; were not following the deft in-
tertwinings of the slender lingers.
"You mean to set about obliterat-
ing' Judge MacFarlane forthwith?"
she asked.
"Assuredly. I have been whipping
the thing into shape all afternoon*
that is what kept me from dining
with you."
"It involves some kind of legal pro-
cedure?"
"Yes; a rather complicated one."
"Could you explain it so that I could
understand it?"
"I think so. In the first place the
| question is raised by means of an in-
formation or inquiry called a quo
warranto. This is directed to the re-
ceiver. and is a demand to know by
what authority he holds. Is it cleat
thus far?" •
"Pellucidly," she said.
"In reply the receiver cites his au-
thority, which is the order from Judge
MacFarlane: and in our turn we pro-
ceed to show that the authority does
not exist—that the judge's election
was illegal and that therefore his acts
are void. Do I make it plain?"
"You make it seem as though it
were impossible to fail. And j'et I
know you will fail."
"How do you know it?"
"Don't ask me; I couldn't begin to
tell you that. But in some spiritual
or mental looking-glass I can see you
coming to me with the story of that
failure—coming to ask my help."
He smiled.
"You don't need to be the prophet-
ess Penelope says you are to foresee
part of that. I always come to you
with my woes."
"Do you?—oftener than you go to
Miss Brentwood?"
This time* his smile was a mere
tightening of the lips.
"You do love to grind me on that
side, don't you?" he said. "I and my
affairs are less than nothing to Miss
Brentwood, and no one knows it any
belter than you do."
•"But you want to go to her," she
persisted. "I am only the alterna-
tive."
He looked her full in the eyes.
' Miss Van Brock, what is it you
| want me to say? What can I say more
than I said a moment ago—that you
! are the truest friend a man ever had?"
The answering look out of the brown
I eyes was age-old in its infinite wis-
dom.
"How little you men know when you
think you know the most," she said
half-musingly; then she broke off ab-
ruptly. "Lit us talk- about something
else. If Maj. Guilford Is wrecking the
railroad, why is lie spending so much
money on improvements? Have you
thought to ask yourself that ques-
tion?"
"A good many times," he admitted,
following her promptly back to first
principles.
"And you have not found the an-
swer?"
"Not one that fujly satisfies me-
no."
"I've found one."
"Intuitively?" he smiled.
"No; it's pure logic, this time. Do
you remember showing me a letter
that Mr. Hunnicott wrote you just be-
fore the explosion—a letter in which
! he repeat d a hit of gossip about Mr.
ern Pacific at a fraction more than
the market when the stock is sinking
every day? 1 was curious enough to
pass the 'why' along to a friend of
mine in Wall street."
"Of course he told you all about it/*
said Kent, incredulously.
"He told me what I needed to know.
The broker in question is a Planta-
gould man."
Still I fail to 'connect up,' as the
linemen say."
"Do you? Ah, David, David! will you
leave it for a woman to point out
a speech yesterday. "What we^want
is action. This hocus pocus has gone
on long enough." "Hocus Pocus!
That's the tip!" agreed the wise ones
around the senate. A pool was made
up among the pages and employes, anil
a good sized bet was sent to Benning
and played on Hocus Pocus. Hocus
Pocus won at odds of C to 1.
Deafness Cannot Be Cured
port'on of I ho ear. There Is only
cure deafnesf, iirnl that Is by constitutional rcnieJ
PeafnoM Is ausod by an Inflamed condition « f
what you should havp suspected ths | TulT^hav'oUnfu°°TiniCBc,und
moment you read that bit of gossip iu I 11!?e"tLreIy
Mr. Hennicott's letter?"
in.-
i'u I'-
ll be
neen is me re uu. ana unless the Inllainniath n c;mi l .>
taken out and this tubo restored to Its normal <• mli-
Her h'itid was on llio ivm nf hop i \vlll be destroyed forever; nine '.'aBe*
iiei i i.i ii <i was on me aim OI ner out of ten aro caused by ( atarrh. wbk-h Is nothing
chair. He covered it With his own. I but an Itiflamed condlilon of the miuv.us aurfa • .
"I'll i^«,. i .• r W'U give Ono Hundred Dollars for any ca«u of
III leave It for you, Portia. You Deafness ^caused by catarrh) that cannot be cured
are my good angel."
She withdrew the hand quickly, hut j
there was no more than playful re-
sentment in her retort.
"Shame on you!" she scoffed. !
you
"What would Miss Brentwood say?"
"I wish you would leave her out
of it." he frowned. "You are con-
tinually ignoring the fact that she
has promised to be the wife of an-
other man."
5 Will fclve One
ness(caused lv
by Hall's Catarrh (.'uri
* V.
Sola by Drupeists. 7r.c
Take Hall's Family Pills for constlpat'cn.
NOTABLE WOMAN SINGER.
Had No Great Career Because She
Was Devoted to Home-
Mrs. Julia Houston West, a notable
church and oratorio singer in Boston,
a generation ago, died in the Brattle-
"And lias thereby freed you from all ' boro retreat, at the age of 73. She
obligations of loyalty? Don't deceive i was long the soprano of the new Old
yourself: women are not made that South, and her voice, brilliant and
way. Doubtless she will go on and i powerful, would have given hor a great
marry the other man in due season;
but siie will never forgive you if you
smash her ideals. But we were talk-
ing about the things you ought to
have guessed. Fetch me the atlaa
from the book-case—lower shelf;
right-hand corner; that's it."
[To Bo Continued.J
career, had she not been devoted to a
home life. Her especial public dis-
tinction was the singing of "The Star
Spangled Banner" nt the peace jubi-
lee in Boston In 18(19, where Patrick
Sarsfield Gilmore had gathered his
chorus of 20,000, his many bands anil
orchestral force and against that back-
ground and an organ added, with hells,
cannon and other noises to assist,
Julia Houston pitted her superb voice
and made a veritable sensation. She
married James F. West, of Haverhill,
twenty-five years ago, and afterward
occasionally sang In oratorios and con-
certs. Shortly after Mr. West's death,
In 1903, she became insane, but her
hallucinations took the shape of ap-
pearances before applauding audi,
ences.
King Courts Seclusion.
The Itinerary of King Edward's com-
ing cruise in the Mediterranean is to
be kept as secret as possible. "This,"
says Truth, "will save his majesty
the receptions and ceremonials and
the intolerable nuisance of the Vic-
toria and Albert being dogged by I he
yachts of pushing snobs."
A BUSY WOMAN
Can Do the Work of 3 or 4 If Well Fed.
An energetic young woman living
Just outside of New York, writes:
"I am at present doing all the house-
work of a dairy farm, caring for " chil-
dren, a vegetable and liower garden, a
large number of fowls, besides manag-
ing an extensive exchange business
through the mails and pursuing my
regular avocation as a writer for sev-
eral newspapers and magazines (de-
signing fancy work for the latter) and
all the energy and ability to do this I
owe to Grape-Nuts food.
"It was not always so, and a year
ago when the shock of my nursing
baby's death utterly prostrated me and
derangod my stomach and nerves so
that I could not assimilate as much
as a mouthful of solid food, and was in
even worso condition mentally, he
would have been a rash prophet who
would have predicted that It ever
would do no.
"Prior to this great grief I had suf-
fered for years with impaired diges-
tion, Insomnia, agonU'.lng cramps in
l-.nrTllHhllinn mill Art. ^ )n tll0 s((]e consl].
II has been said by a wicked wit i pati0n, and other bowel derangements
pells I
'•llircil <;lrl." ?;<(« "Mold."
When Mellfsa from "up country"
came to i"?igu over the kitchen, her
mistress was wise enough to realize
that while Melissa's, hands would do
willing service for the household, her
tongue could not al once be trained
lo :, 'w and strange ways of speech.
When the up-slairs maid had her "aft-
ernoon out"Mellssa enjoyed wailing on
the family al luncheon, and in spite of
hinls, enlivening (lie meal with free
comment. One day luncheon was a
little lale, but Melissa proudly dis-
played a new variety of mutllns when
her mistress appeared. "I was bound
to get Hie pesky little thing3 brown,
end the stove ai led like all possessed,"
said Melissa, as she held out the ptate
of muffins the full length of her bony
arm. "Some of 'em are in the oven
yet, and I don't know as any of 'em
are baked clearn through, but time
l:cp' a-going, so thinks I, I'll set on the
donedest ones an' they may make what
they can of 'em: and 1 guess you could
go farther an' fare consid'able worse
if you ask me."—Youth's Companion
(llit'itliili of Clollilltic.
Mr. Jones was very found of a kind
of boiled pudding his wife made, so
when she had gone away for an after-
noon and evening she promised that
she would leave one of the favored
puddings in the saucepan for his even-
ing meal.
"Well." she said, on her return, "and
how did the pudding go down?"
"Soo-preme!" said Tom, smacking
his lips at the recollection. " 'Twas
as good n pudding as you have ever
made."
"That's good," was (he gratified re-!
sponse ofYlrs. Jones. "I'm glad yon
enjoyed it. What did you do with the j
cloth?"
For a moment Mr. Jones solemnly
surveyed her.
"What," lie naid, "did It have a elo'h '
on?"—London Answers.
"It's easy from this on," said Kent,
consolingly. "You know how Mac-
Farlane secured his re-election?"
"Everybody knows lhat."
"Well, to cut a long story short, the j Seniple Falkland and Ills mysterious
gerrymander ileal wont stand the: vlclt to Gaston?"
light. The constitution says—" j ' Yes, I remember It."
that the modern Englishman
art with •. capital H. It is certainly
irue that be knows little of art except
the commercial value of commodities
under this heading. He buys art treas-
ures as a speculation or an investment,
and the number of men and women in
and out of English "society" who are
not amateur dealers, and the quantities
of curiosity shops there are throughout
the country, shows how large Is tills
traffic.—London Graphic.
I.<>liK-!-'(*It Wit lit.
Customer—Say, what kind of a crazy
novel is this, anyway? It begins with
the last chapter nnd ends with the
first.
IJookseller—Oh, that edition is in-
tended for ladles only.—Chicago l)allv
News.
all these were familiar to my dally
life. Medicines gave mo no relief-
nothing did, until a few months ago,
at a friend's suggestion, 1 began to use
Grape-Nuts food, and subsequently
gave up cofTee entirely and adopted
)fo3lum Food Coffee at all my meals.
"To-day I am free from all the trou-
bles I have enumerated. My digestion
Is simply perfect, I assimilate my food
without the least distress, enjoy sweet,
restful sleep, nnd have a buoyant feel
Ing of pleasure In my varied duties. In
fact, I am a new woman, entirely made
over, and I repeat, I owe It all to
Grape-Nuts nnd Postum Coffee."
Nnme given by Postum Co., Battle
Creek, Mich.
There's a reason. Read the little
book, "The Road to Wellvllle," in pkgs.
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Miller, C. H. The Hennessey Clipper. (Hennessey, Okla.), Vol. 16, No. 49, Ed. 1 Thursday, May 3, 1906, newspaper, May 3, 1906; Hennessey, Oklahoma. (https://gateway.okhistory.org/ark:/67531/metadc105495/m1/2/?q=j+w+gardner: accessed June 22, 2024), The Gateway to Oklahoma History, https://gateway.okhistory.org; crediting Oklahoma Historical Society.