Colony Courier (Colony, Okla.), Vol. 6, No. 15, Ed. 1 Thursday, December 31, 1914 Page: 3 of 8
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Small Dqg Bars Dignitaries From White House
Hf ABHINQTON.—Miss Bones, the cousin of the president, had released her
ff small, shaggy, little dog. with hair hanging in his eyes, but with a proud
and important swagger, befitting his position. He was cavorting about the
north door of the White House and
£
/BOW
slipped out into the open, when the
guards of the executive mansion were
otherwise engaged.
Thus it happened that two offi-
cials, walking arm in arm up the
White House driveway, unmindful of
anything except the heavy importance
of the national business on hand, were
euddenly surprised by something jr
y other that flew into their path, and
made it impossible for them to go any
farther.
For the small dog barked and barked, and ran at them, and flew around
them, and showed his teeth, which are small and sharp, and very white. The
two men stood still, and looked at the dog, and each inquired of the other if
he minded having his trousers torn or his ankles bitten, and the small dog
had all but exhausted himself in his enthusiasm as the nation’s safeguard,
when a large policeman took him by the nape of the neck, and dropped him
Inside the White House door.
“That dog,” observed one man to the other, as they went on their way
to the executive offices, “that dog has the largest bark for the smallest dog,
that I ever saw. We couldn’t have been more effectually Btopped if the
president had let a mastiff'out on us!”
“I never liked any kind of a dog,” observed the other, “of any size what-
ever!”
How Uncle Sam Sets Drinking Water Standard
avOW that Uncle Sam, through the United States public health service, has
W set a standard of purity for all drinking water furnished on common car-
riers entering into Interstate traffic, many inquiries have begun to pour into
Surgeon General Rupert Blue's office
about the manner and method used
by the government's chemists and
physicians in setting this new water
standard.
Just how this standard is reached
was described in nontechnical and
understandable English by an officer
of the public health service, as
follows:
About fifteen drops of water are
taken from the sample in the labora-
tory, and this small quantity of water
is spread upon the surface of a thin film of agar, a sort of gelatin, poured
into a flat glass dish, after the dish and all instruments used, including the
agar, have been thoroughly sterilized to kill such germs as are ordinarily
present. This dish of gelatin, or culture media, as it is termed, containing
the water, is placed in an incubator and kept at a temperature of 98.6 degrees
Fahrenheit for 24 hours.
After this period has elapsed, the plate is taken out and very small spots
are noticed dotted over its surface. Each one of these spots represents a
colony of germs which has developed; each colony from a separate germ con-
tained in the original sample of water. The colonies are counted by means
of a disk ruled into squares, which fits under the thin glass dish. If the
number of colonies found in the amount of water planted on the agar (15
drops) exceeds one hundred, the water is to be rejected as unsatisfactory.
Any count less than 100 colonies per plate is considered a safe limit of per-
missible bacteriological impurity.
There are other tests to which the water is subjected, using larger quan-
tities and different materials as culture media.
n, GAS
OR SICK STOMACH
Time it! Pape’s Diapepsin ends
all Stomach misery in five
minutes.
Do some foods you eat hit back-
taste good, but work badly; ferment
Into stubborn lumps and cause a sick,
sour, gassy stomach? Now, Mr. or
Mrs. Dyspeptic, Jot this down; Pape’s
Diapepsin digests everything, leaving
nothing to'sour and upset you. There
never was anything so safely quick, so
certainly effective. No difference how
badly your stomach is disordered you
will get happy relief in five minutes,
but what pleases you most is that it
strengthens and regulates your stom-
ach so you can eat your favorite foods
without fear.
You feel different as soon as "Pape’s
Diapepsin” comes in contact with the
stomach—distress Just vanishes—your
stomach gets sweet, no gases, no belch-
ing, no eructations of undigested food.
Go now, make the best Investment
you ever made by getting a large flfty-
cent case of Pape’s Diapepsin from any
store. You realize in five minutes how
needless it is to suffer from Indiges-
tion, dyspepsia or bad stomach. Adv.
MR. BUSBY^ AS A HUMORIST
Of Course It Doesn't Often Happen,
But on This Occasion He
Failed to Score.
Busby—I see th’ Turks have been
kicking up th’ sand around the Suez
canal.
Mrs. B. (faintly Interested)—Some
religious ceremony?
Busby—No-o-o! It's war. They’re
fighting. The report from Berlin says
they’ve licked th’ British army to a
frazzle. It looks as if the canal would
fall into th’ Turks’ hands.
Mrs. B. (calmly)—I can’t see what
good it would do them.
Busby (leading up to his climax)—
Why, they’d loot it.
Mrs. B. (innocently)—Of what?
Busby (triumphantly)—Of the hard-
ware. They’d take the locks, of course.
Ha, ha, ha!”
A brief silence ensues.
Mrs. Busby (sweetly)—But there
are no locks in the Suez canal. /
And It wasn’t any consolation to
Busby to remember that he had no
one but himself to blame.
TO TILL UMEO 'CALOMEL WHEH BILIOUS? NO! STOP!
-.......... ACTS LIKE DYNAMITE OH UVER
THE CANADIAN GOVERNMENT
ASKING FOR INCREASED ACRE-
AGE IN GRAIN, TO MEET
EUROPEAN DEMAND.
American Mule Still Holds His Own in Our Army
ffieHE American army mule need have no fear for his laurels because of the
■ great part gasoline motors have played in transportation problems of
European armies in the present war.
ft**
Something In Thle Name.
In New York a teacher found that
a little negro girl was named Fertiliz-
er Johnson.
"Are you sure that Fertilizer is your
right name?” she asked.
"Yes, ma’am,” replied the little girl.
“Well, tell your mother to come
here,” said the teacher.
The mother came the next day.
"Yes; Fertilizer is right,” she said.
"You see, I named her after her father
and mother both. Her father’s name is
Ferdinand and my name is Liza, so we
called her Fertilizer."
Until American roads generally are
brought up to the high standard of
the roads of Germany, France, Bel-
gium and other European countries,
the army mule will determine, through
his capacity for hauling, the limita-
tion of operations for American mili-
tary forces.
Only one branch of the United
States army Is giving serious attention
to motor traction. In the quartermas-
ter’s department experidents are be-
ing made, particularly along the Texas
border, with handling supplies in mo-
tor trucks. Motor trucks are In general use, of course, about army posts
and wherever good roads are available; but when maneuvers take the col-
umns Into the field and the sandy or muddy country roads, where mare wheel
trackB across the country are the only highways, the six-mule team is still
master of the transportation situation.
A few years ago it waB determined tp experiment with motor transporta-
tion as a means to increase the radius of field artillery. General Crozler,
chief of the army ordnance bureau, designed a motor battery wagon, which
was tried out in maneuvers. It proved a flat failure, for it was so heavy that
It broke through bridges, sunk to the hubs in soft roads and generally ham-
pered the battery to which it was attached. The experiment was abandoned
and the ordnance bureau Is now content to await the results of the experi-
ments of the quartermaster’s department in self-propelled army transporta-
tion units. Mules and horses are good enough for American artillerymen
as yet
Albino Sparrow Returns to the National Capital
mHB albino sparrow that has for a number of years made its home In some
1 cranny in a building on the east aide of Eleventh street between the Ave
nue and E street, has returned to Its accustomed haunts, after an absence of
several months. Many persons who
Wondsrs of Science.
A French scientist sayB that the bil-
lions of cubic feet of heated gas that
have been shot into the upper air
since the first of August have been
displaced by cold air from the north
pole, thus causing the early freeze
along the battle line. On the same
theory it may be that the safe and
sane Fourth of July crusade was to
blame for our hot summer.
No Failure Is Final.
One of Napoleon’s marshals Is said
to have approached him on the battle-
field and exclaimed:
"General, I fear that the battle is
lost."
Napoleon coolly looked at his watch
and replied:
“Time for another battle. Summon
the army to a fresh charge."
bfi.
had become familiar with this "off
color” and oddly marked member of
the sparrow tribe by reason of seeing
him flitting about in the street or
flying up to the nest the bird has suc-
cessfully hidden for years, had begun
to think the little albino had passed to
the happy hunting grounds, or had
changed its abiding place. The return
of the bird to Its usual haunts a few
days ago, however, Indicates that it
.....«.......»
canary or at least a cross between a regular sparrow and a canary. Such,
however is not the cnRo. The bird Is a real albino, although It has Sbme
dark feathers In Its wings and tall. The body plumage and most of the wing
and tall feathers are whlte-thnt is, ns white us the feathers of a bird that
liveB the life of an English sparrow can bo. . . .
Those who have noticed the ntblno sparrow year after year as I busied
Itself hustling for u living about the block on Eleventh street declare the bird
h. twelve years old. Whether this Is true or not, it would bo
Sir.?.’ .o SSSKT-,......b. b„d b......... U.............
block for at least Boven years.
There are a number of holders of
land in Western Canada, living In the
United States, to whom the Canadian
Government will shortly make an ap
peal to place the unoccupied areas
they are holding under cultivation.
The lands are highly productive, but
In a state of idleness they are not
giving any revenue beyond the un- ,
earned increment and are not of the
benefit to Canada that these lands
could easily be made. It is pointed
out that the demand for grains for
years to come will cause good prices
for all that can be produced. Not
only will the price of grains be af-
fected, but also will that of cattle,
hogs und horses, in fact, everything
that can be grown on the farms. When
placed under proper cultivation, not
the kind that is often resorted to,
which lessens yield and land values,
many farms will pay for themselves in
two or three years. Careful and in-
tensive work is required, and if this
is given in the way it is given to the
high-priced lands of older settled
countries, surprising results will fol-
low.
There are those who are paying rent,
who sho Id not be doing so. They
would do better to purchase lands In
Western Canada at the present low
price at which they are being offered
by land companies or private Individ-
uals. These have been held for the
htgh prices that many would have
realized, but for the war and the finan
cial stringency. Now is the time to
buy: or If it Is preferred advantage
might be taken of the offer of 160
acres of land free that is made by the
Dominion Government. The man who
owns his farm has a life of indepen-
dence. Then again there are those
who are renting who might wish to
continue as renters. They have some
means as well as sufficient outfit to be-
gin in a new country where all the
advantages are favourable. Many of
the owners of unoccupied lands would
be willing to lease them on reasonable
terms. Then again, attention is drawn
to the fact that Western Canada num-
bers amongst its most successful farm-
ers, artisans, business men, lawyers,
doctors and many other professions.
Farming today is a profession. It is
no longer accompanied by the drudg-
ery that wo were acquainted with a
generation ago. The fact that a man
is not following a farming life today,
does not preclude him from going on
a Western Canada farm tomorrow,
and making a success of it. If he is
not in possession of Western Canada
land that he can convert into a farm
ho should secure some, make It a
farm by equipping it and working it
himself. The man who has been hold-
ing his Western Canada land waiting
for the profit he naturally expected
has been justified in doing so. Its
agricultural possibilities are certain
and sure. If he has not realized im-
mediately by making a sale, he should
not worry. But to let It lie Idle Is not
good business. By getting It placed
under cultivation a greater profit will
come to him. Have It cultivated by
working It himself, or get some good
representative to do It. Set about get-
ting a purchaser, a renter or some
one to operate on shares.
The department of the Dominion
Government having charge of the Im-
migration, through Mr. W. D. Scott,
Superintendent at Ottawa, Canada, is
directing the attention of non-resident
owners of Western Canada lands to
the fact that money will he made out
of farming these lands. The agents
of the Department, located at different
points in the States, are rendering as-
sistance to this end.—Advertisement.
I Guarantee “Dodsons’ Liver Tone” Will Give You the Best Liver
and Bowel Cleansing You Ever Had—Doesn’t Make You Sick!
spoonful and If It doesn’t straighten
you right up and make you feel tine
and vigorous I want you to go back to
the store and get your money. Dod-
son’s l.lver Tone is destroying the
sale of calomel because It is real liver
medicine; entirely vegetable, therefore
it cannot salivate or make you sick.
I guarantee that one spoonful of
Dodson's Liver Tone will put your
sluggish liver to work and clean your
bowels of that sour bile and consti-
pated waste which Is clogging your
system and making you feel miserable.
I guarantee that a bottle of Dodson's
Liver Tone wilk keep your entire fam-
ily feeling fine for months. Give it to
your children. It is harmless; doesn’t
gripe and they like Its pleasant taste.
Stop using calomel! It makes you
sick. Don't lose a day's work, if you
feel lazy, sluggish, bilious or consti-
pated, listen to me!
Calomel is mercury or quicksilver
whiclM causes necrosis of the bones
Calomel, when it comes into contact
with sour bile crashes into it, breaking
! it up. This is when you feel that aw-
i ful nausea and cramping. If you feel
1 "all knocked out,” If your liver is tor-
pid and bowels constipated or you
have headache, dizziness, coated
tongue, if breath is bad or stomach
sour Just try a spoonful of harmless
Dodson’s Liver Tone.
Here's my guarantee—Go to any
drug store or dealer and get a 5()-cent
bottle of Dodson’s Liver Tone. Take a
WORMS.
“Wormy", that’s what’s the matter of ’em. Stomach and la-
testtunl worms. Nearly as Wl as distemper. Cost you too muck
to feed ’em. Look bud—ore bad. Don't physic eiu to death.
Snotin'. Cure will remove the worms. Improve the appetite, ana
tone ’em up sll round, and don't "physio.” Arts on glands and bio
Full directions with each bottle, and sold by all druggists.
SPOHN MEDICAL CO., Chemists.
Goshsn, lnd., U. S. A.
Important to Mothers
Examine carefully every bottle of
CASTORIA, a safe and sure remedy for
Infants and children, and see that it
Bears the
Signature of , ^
In Use For Over 30 Years.
Children Cry lor Fletcher*! Castoria
Hit Own Fault.
"Sir, your daughter had promised to
become my wife."
"Well, don’t come to me for sympa-
thy; you might know something would
happen to you, hanging around here
Hve nights a week."—Houston Post.
Accounted For.
"How do you like my new fence?"
*Td like It better If the pickets
were an equnl distance apart. What’s
the idea of building It like that?"
"The only man I could get to build
It stuttered.”
8h« Kept Her Vow.
"Gladys vowed she would never live
to be gray haired."
"She has kept her oath. I found her
in a dyeing condition."
Her Ago.
Howard—How old can Mlsa Jones
be?
Victor—Old enough to call college
men "college boys.”—Judge.
Ammunition Used in War.
How much ammunition does a mod-
ern army use? We shall not know
until after the war what the German
and the allied forces have been ex-
pending; but we know what the Ger-
mans used in 1870-71. The total for
rifles was 30,000,000 cartridges, for
field artillery 362,000 rounds. It Is
worth noting that battles are much
loss costly In ammunition than sieges.
The siege of Strassburg alone cost,
weight for weight, three times the
amount of ammunition used In all the
decisive battles and actions through-
out the whole war. Of course these
figures are a mere bagatelle com-
gle, with Its millions of soldiers and
Its quick-firing guns and Its week-long
battles.—Manchester Guardian.
Not a Misdemeanor.
Colonel Carter had been playing golf
for but three months. Therefore, when
the secretary of the club saw the col-
onel playing hlH ball several feet In
front of the tee disks during a tourna-
ment he thought the veteran soldier
had forgotten the rules.
“Colonel! Colonel!" he exclaimed,
"you must play from behind the tee
disks! ”
The colonel'B face turned red, but
he preserved his dignity.
"It's none of your business. Bah," he
answered as calmly as possible, "but
this Is my third stroke!”—Collier’s
Weekly.
TAKE SALTS TO FLUSH
KIDNEYS IF BACK HURTS
8aya Too Much Moat Forms Uric Aeld
Which Clogs ths Kidneys snd
Irritstss ths Blsddsr.
Most folks forget that the kidneys,
like the bowels, get sluggish and clog-
ged and need a flushing occasionally,
else we have backache and dull misery
in the kidney region, severe head-
aches, rheumatic twinges, torpid liver,
acid stomach, sleeplessness and all
aorta of bladder disorders.
You simply must keep your kidneys
active and clean, and the moment you
feel an ache or pain In the kidney
region, get about four ounces of Jad
Salts from any good drug store here,
take a tablespoonful In a glass of
water before breakfast for a few days
and your kidneys will then act fine.
This famous salts Is made from the
acid of grapes and lemon juice, com-
bined with llthla, and Is harmless to
flush clogged kidneys and stimulate
them to normal activity. It also neu-
tralizes the acids In the urine so it
no longer Irritates, thus ending blad-
der disorders.
Jad Salts Is harmless; Inexpensive;
makes a delightful effervescent llthia-
water drink which everybody should
take now and then to keep their kid-
neys clean, thus avoiding serious com-
plications.
A well-known local druggist says he
sells lots of Jad Salts to folks who be-
lieve in overcoming kidney trouble
while It la only trouble.—Adv.
Quiet Louvain.
I had a look at the now much-talked-
of Louvain, quite a pretty old place,
with Its magnificent hotel de vllle
crowded In by the impressive church
In the center of the town, and Its In-
numerable other old gray churches
with long sloping roofs—the place a
perfect nest of nuns and friars. The
streets were lined with the high wulls
and closed windows of convent after
convent, and huge clusters of monas-
teries were on the hills about the town
—many very newly built and modern
—and the town was seething with
black-robed priests and brown bare-
footed monks and coped nuns. This
was the great Roman Catholic center,
where some of tho monastic orders
have their chief establishments. The
library of the university, so ruthlessly
destroyed, contained a priceless col-
lection of church documents.—"A
Glimpse of Belgium Before the War,"
Isabel Anderson. In National Maga-
zine.
She Remembered.
“Mamma," said little Lauretta, "Aunt
Mary Is getting awfully fr.t, isn’t she?"
“It Isn’t polite to say ’fat,’ de: r. You
should say ‘stout’," rejoined her moth-
er.
At dinner that evening when she
was asked what kind of riraat she
would like, Lauretta replied: "A 114-
tie of the lean and a little of the
stout, please."
The 8hocka of Football.
“How rough this sport of football
Is! What shocks of irresistible bod-
ies!”
"Humph! What shocks of Irresisti-
ble hair!”
Many a school boy’s life Is made
miserable by trying to learn the multi-
plication table.
The average man had rather be the
author of a book than to make a mil-
lion dollars.
Always u»e Red Croaa Ball Blue. Delights
the loundreiMJ. At all good grocer*. Adv*
A man would rather have fortune
smile on him than give him the long*.
ror Thrush
and Foot t
Diseases
ar*
HANFORD’S
Balsam of Mynft
For Galls, Wire^"^
Cuts, Lamecen,
Strains, Bunches,
Thrush, Old Sorw,
Nail Wound*. Fool Reft
Fistula, Bleeding, Etc. E
Mid* Since 1348. "USK?*
Pile* 2Sc* SOc and *1.00
AUDoalerss«S^v«
Not Ready.
"Put on your helmet an’ your red
shirt, SllaH, there’s a big fire down the
road a piece.”
“Shucks! I can’t go. My shirt's In
the washtub an' the old woman's out in
the garden fillin’ my helmet with a
mess of beans.”—Birmingham Age-
Herald.
Probably tho most convenient thing
about a woman's figure Is her ability
to shift her watHt line anywhere be-
tween her kneus and shoulders.
True to Typs.
The Customer—These grand opera
phonograph records are no good. I
can't get anything out ot half of them,
The Salesman—They ure our finest
achievement. You never cun tell when
these records will sing. They're so
temperamental.—I*ondon Opinion.
A Gentle Hint.
He—Once for all, I demand to
know who 1b master In this house?
She—You'll be happier If you don’t
find out—Philadelphia Ledger.
Lovers oft rush In where husbands
fear to tread.
Constipation
Vanishes Forever
Prompt Relief—Permanent Cur#
CARTER’S LITTLE ~
LIVER PILLS never
fail. Purely vegeta
ble — act surely
but gently on
the fiver.
Stop after
dinner dis-
tress-cure
indigestion,-
improve the complexion, brighten theeyea
SMALL PILL. SMALL DOSE. SMALL PfUCI.
Genuine must bear Signature
DEFIANCE STARCH
i« constantly growing In favor because M
Does Not Stick to the Iron
and it will not injure the fluent fabric Foe
laundry purports it hat so aqtiaL If OA
package 10c. 1-3 more atarck for tame money
DEFIANCE STARCH CO.. Omaha, Nebraska
A toll-t pr*pv*t
Fe^MtoAsst
****tftorr
W. N. U., Oklahoma City, No. 1-1918.
Death Lurks In A Weak Heart
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Seger, Neatha H. Colony Courier (Colony, Okla.), Vol. 6, No. 15, Ed. 1 Thursday, December 31, 1914, newspaper, December 31, 1914; Colony, Oklahoma. (https://gateway.okhistory.org/ark:/67531/metadc941624/m1/3/: accessed June 27, 2024), The Gateway to Oklahoma History, https://gateway.okhistory.org; crediting Oklahoma Historical Society.