The Orlando Clipper (Orlando, Okla.), Vol. 10, No. 51, Ed. 1 Friday, November 24, 1916 Page: 3 of 8
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THE ORLANDO CLIPPER
S
Is the first essential to
continued good health
when help is needed for
THE APPETITE
THE STOMACH
THE LIVER OR
THE BOWELS
TRY----
HOSTETTER’S
Stomach Bitters
•• I «*>\ Major, wlmt'a good for a cold beside whisky
"That ■ my. dear boy. Most anything is better (ov
a void than whisky, or any other alcoholic stimulant, but
flu* very beat thing posaibla for a cold or bronchitis is that
*dd well known Vriuedv our fathers used to its*
Boschee’s
German Syrup
has for the last SI years been steadily
used In all parts of the civilized world
for the rapid relief of colds, coughs, bron*
chitis, throat and lung irritation. No
other remedy has such a remarkable
record of widespread distribution. 25c.
and 75c. sizes at druggists everywhere.
COTTON
We handle cotton on consignment only Y
and have the Bnest concrete warehouses
with almost unlimited capacity, where
your cotton wil I be absol utely free from
all weather damage. Highest classifi-
cations and lowest interest rates on
money . advanced. Write us for full
particulars.
GOHLM AN, LESTER & CO.
The oldest and largest exclusive
cotton factors in Texas.
HOUSTON, TEXAS
Cold Logic.
“Father, gimme a good lickin’ and
make me cry,” was the astonishing re-
quest little Jimmy made one day.
“What makes you want such an ab-
surd thing?” inquired father.
“You’ll hit me and I’ll holler with all
my might and mother will wipe my
face with her apron and tive me a
penny and I’ll buy candy,” came the
logical rejoinder.
Neglected Colds
bring Pneumonia.
Look out.
The old family remedy—in tablet
form—safe, sure, easy to take. No
opiates—no unpleasant after effects.
Cures colds in 24 hours—Grip in 3
days. Money back if it fails. Get
the genuine box with Red Top and
Mr. Hill's picture on it—25 cents.
At Any Drug Store
LAUGHED AT “CLOSE SHAVES’'
Drollery of Irish Soldier Cheered Up
British Troops Sullenly Falling
Back From Mons.
The vastness of the operations in
the early days of the “great retreat’’
of the British army in August, 1914;
the uncertainty of the general staff It-
self about what was happening in
some quarters of the field, and the
lUniversal Ignorance of the rank and
file of what had happened elsewhere
than in their own immediate vicinity,
all tended to discourage the troops.
For a time, says Mr. Frederic Cole-
man In his book, “From Mons to
Ypres,” I was to act as usher at a
point a bit north of Saint Quentin.
Placed on the road by a staff officer,
and told where the men of the vari-
ous units were to be directed, I chose
to stand by a French lady who, with
her daughters, was supplying coffee,
steaming hot, to the passing Tommies.
Never shall I forget that staff offl-
cer’s parting Instructions. “Cheer
them as you keep them on the move,”;
he said. “They are very down-
hearted. Tell ’em where to go, and
cheer ’em up—cheer ’em up.”
Of all the jobs that have ever fallen
to my lot, I thought, this promises to
be one of the most hopeless. Cheer
them up, indeed! A fine atmosphere^
this, for cheer! Ragged and muddy
they looked straggling along.
The first man who caught my atten-
tion particularly was a tall captain,
an old acquaintance. He showed me
his service cap, through the crown of
which two neat bullet holes had been
drilled. Both of the bullets had
missed their mark, although one had
plowed a slight furrow along his scalp
and left an angry red welt.
No one had examined Ids bead to
find what damage had been caused,
and he asked me to investigate. He
bent over, and I poked my finger here
and there, asking where it hurt and
how much—In short, doing the best I
could to satisfy his thirst for Informa-
tion.
As I was intent on my amateur prob-
ing a voice from behind commenced,
“A close shave the little divll made
that tolme, sure I” Turning at the soft
brogue, what was my surprise to see a
Jock, in a kilt that looked as If its
wearer had been rolled in the mud.
He was capless, his shock of red hair
stood on end, and his blue Irish eyes
twinkled merrily. I was genuinely
surprised. It wns before I had learned
that an Irishman in a Scotch regiment
is no rnra avis.
As If entering himself In a competi-
tion of close shaves, the Irishman held
his right ear between his thumb and
finger. “And what do ye think of
that?” he queried.
Right through the lobe of his ear,
close to his cheek, a Mauser bullet
had drilled a clean hole. “Close, that,
I’m thinkfn’,” he said, “and I nlver
knew how close me ear was to me
head till that thing come along.”
The burst of laughter from the
group that had gathered was infec-
tious. The boys trailed off together,
chattihg over other stories of close
shaves, and leaving me thankful that
the Irish lad had come by, cheered
that lot up, and so saved me the task.
—Youth’s Companion.
Regaining Lost Speech.
Nearly every day the papers contain
a paragraph stating that some victim
of shell shock has suddenly recovered
his speech, and the • Variety of the
methods is curious, the London Ob-
server observes. Here are a few:
1. Grew excited over a game of
cards.
2. Fell downstairs.
3. Had a tooth pulled out at the
dentist's—-without anesthetic.
4. Choked through inhaling cigarette
smoke.
APPENDICITIS
If yon hovo boon threatened or have GALL8TONH8.
FRE*
L, K HIT !, w.tf, al® H, DKAUBOUN ST..U1IUG0
5. Underwent a flashlight photo-
graph.
6. Put the wrong end of a lighted
cigarette in Ids mouth.
The card cure, on the whole, seems
he least painful.
He used a pebble
in his day, to keep
his mouth moist—
WE use
WRIGLEYS
WRIGLEY’S gives us a
wholesome, antiseptic,
refreshing confection to
take the place of the cave
man’s pebble.
We help teeth, breath, appetite,
digestion and deliciously soothe
mouth and throat with this
welcome sweetmeat.
The Wrigley Spearmen want to send you
their Book of Gum-ption. Send a postal
for it today. Wm. Wrigley Jr. Co.,
1327 Kesner Building, Chicago.
The Flavor Lasts!
WRAPPED
IN
(ky name's brown
[and i'm in town.
GET ME!
Early Christian.
“Does your minister practice what
he preaches?" the newcomer ques-
tioned.
“He does,” the citizen answered with
a sigh, “and I’d he perfectly willing to
have him stop. He lives next door to
me, and begins at seven o’clock Sun-
day morning to practice what he is go-
ing to preach.”
Good temper oils the wheel# of life.
Very few people trouble themselves
to generate enthusiasm for tilings in
which they have no interest.
THAT GRIM WHITE SPECTRE,
Pneumonia, follows on the heels of a
neglected cough or cold. Delay no
longer. Take Mansfield’s Cough Bal-
sam. Price 50c and $1.00.—Adv.
Nothing takes the starch out of a
stuckup girl like an unexpected kiss.
Kidney Disorder
(BY DR. V. M. PIERCE.)
The most simple methods are usu-
ally the most effective ones when
treating any disorder of the human
system. The mere drinking a cup
of hot water each morning, plenty
of pure water all day, and a little
Anuric before every meal has been
found the most effective means of
overcoming kidney trouble. Death
would occur If the kidneys did not
work day and night in separating
poisons and uric acid from the blood.
The danger signals are backache,
depressions, pains, heaviness, drowsi-
ness, Irritability, headaches, chilli-
ness, rheumatic twinges, swollen
Joints or gout.
Since It is such a simple matter to
step into your favorite drug store and
obtain Anuric, anyone who earnestly
desires to regain health and new life
will waste no time In beginning this
treatment.
OKLAHOMA WOMEN SHOULD
TAKE THIS ADVICE
Milburn, Okln.—"I can truthfully
say that I do not think there is any
medicine on the
market to-day
better than Dr.
Pierce’s F a v o -
11 e Prescription
and Golden Med-
ical Discovery. I
feel that I owe
my life to same.
About seventeen
years ago I was
run down In health, the principal trou-
ble was irregularity, and my lungs
seemed affected. After taking six bot-
tles each of ‘Favorite Prescription’ and
‘Golden Medical Discovery’ I was en-
tirely well. I never fail to recom-
mend them.”—MRS. EVA PHEMIS-
TER, Route 1, Box 39.
For sale by druggists. Liquid op
tablets.—Adv.
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Lanter, W. L. The Orlando Clipper (Orlando, Okla.), Vol. 10, No. 51, Ed. 1 Friday, November 24, 1916, newspaper, November 24, 1916; Orlando, Oklahoma. (https://gateway.okhistory.org/ark:/67531/metadc910718/m1/3/: accessed April 25, 2024), The Gateway to Oklahoma History, https://gateway.okhistory.org; crediting Oklahoma Historical Society.