The Muskogee Cimeter. (Muskogee, Indian Terr.), Vol. 5, No. 51, Ed. 1, Thursday, September 29, 1904 Page: 2 of 8
This newspaper is part of the collection entitled: The Muskogee Cimeter (Muskgoee, I.T.) and was provided to The Gateway to Oklahoma History by the Oklahoma Historical Society.
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- - U
Muskogee Ci meter.
XV II. THINi: Udltor.
MUSKOGEE
IND. TER.
NEW STATE NEWS
Tho nnntial confcronco of tlio Hap-
tint church in being held ut Shawnee
this week.
Tho Fairfax Telephone company
has incorporated with a capital stock
of $10000.
Jim Daily an Indian is being held
nt Perry upon the charge of attempt-
ed murder. 'Ilij father-in-law who
was tho victim of tho assault had a
gush cut In his forehead.
Acting under orders from Judge
Dlckcraon Marshal Colbert has
(stopped rjl gambling at Ardmor0
and the slut nmchlnss have been pu:
out of business as well.
Tho trustees of the. state Baptist
collego at Blnckwoll have elected the
iaculty for that institution and madi
nrrangements for tho opening of rhv
school October -lth.
A charter has been issued to tho
Canadian Valley & Wo tarn Railway
company with $:i000000 capital and
headquarters at Norman.
L. D. WnnMand and II. S. Whlto ol
Oklahoma City Leo u. Board of Ma-
dill and W. 0. Talbctt of Ada have
been appointed railway mail clerks.
Mlko White a folorai prisoner con-
fined in jail at Ardmoro charged
with arson died from tho effects of
excessive cigarotto smoking.
W. L. Iaoni a farmer living two
milos north of Ravla lost his house
and its contents last week by fire
The xoof took firo wnilo Mrj. Isom
was cooking dinner.
Fivo pooplo wore arrested In Law
ton loccntly upon tho chargo of Hell-
ing liquor to Indians. Four plcadod
guilty and tho filth givo bend and
waived examination.
Durant is expecting a third lino ol
railroad tho Muskogeo Union is
about eight mlloj out and proliml
nary lines aro bsing run in tho dire:-
Hon of the city.
Tom Roso fourteen years old was
struck by lightning In Marietta and
died from tho effects of tho shock.
Two hoi scs wcro killed and two
other boys woro sevcroly sho2kod Ly
the same bolt.
Eddio Mllligan. llftoen years old
who left his homo In Cisco Texas
August 12 to is.t his uncle. J. S.
Bettos a carpenter living at Mua
kogee 13 lost. lie has wivnv boon
hoard of since his dopaituic tiom
home and diligent search 13 being
mndo for him by rahlives.
A. Carpenter nn engineer on a
freight train was instantly killed at
Sageoyah several miles north of
Chuomoro last weok. Tho engine
jumped tho track and tho tender
crashed Into It. crushing Curnenier.
Tho fireman jumped. Ono of nib
hands was badly mashed.
On tho :10th Inst tho ox-confodorato
soldiers of Comnneho county will
meet In kawtou and organize a cen-
tral ciinp Tho bons and daughters
will also pstabllsh county organiz-.i-tiqns
after tho camp lias been chartered
Tho government has ordered con-
structed two stono buildings at tho
Comnneho Indian school ono mile
from Lawton. The buildings will bo
used ns dormitories one for the gl Is
and one for tho boys.
mmmmmm
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RJ
TICKLE
GRASS
BT
BYRON WILLIAMS
An Editorial "Send Off."
Jest erbout now down in Ol' Mis-
soury th' same boln' atween hnyin'
and huskin' th' kontry papers bo ef-
feivescln' with spokllashun!
Tho wny I hearn it ono o them
thar newspaper fellers what has alius
been a wumoran teetollar- an' a
mocker o' pomes o' pashun up and
gits innocerlated with that thar love's
fitful fever twelvo miles' frum a body
or acquor purer an' his autymobeel
tire punchured!
Seein' thet he's surrounded by th'
enemy's arms ho throws hisself inter
th' face o' providenco (thet not bein'
her name) locks tho gates behind
him an' gits shot whar it'll do him
th' most good!
Refronco is made ter Brother Hank
Somers him as edits that thar noos-
paper over at Sasafras Corners and
Miss Henriotte Solders the school
marm her as whom wo bow ter in
spite o' our rheumatiz an' tight fittliT
overalls!
Frum now on she's his'n an' he's
hern an' if ho don't split ther kin-
dlln' ns ho oughter all she's got V
do is ter lay down th' law an' ther
statootes therein provided!
And tharby hangs er talo as th'
meat kleavor said t' th' choppin'
block after ther dorg had passed
through th skissage faktury! But
jest why thorn Missoury editurs should
bo spockllatin' is more'n I kin see fer
every man no matter how he's bin
blowln' his foghorn gits sumbody sum
day t' put linseed poltisos onto his
nuralgy provided he don't wait so
long th' bait gits all dried up an onen-
ticin' no more!
Fer years now Brother Hank has
bin puttin' his own cat out nights an'
goin round braggin' thet no vumeian
over'd git him cornered inter a mess
o' Chippendale fernlture in his stockin
fcot! No siree!
Ev'ry timo er good-lookin wum-
oran'd como proselitin' eround his
bnilerwick he'd sic ther ofllce dorg
onto her an' take fer th' bowels o' his
sanktum sanktorium scardor. than a
gopher what hod got his tall decap-
ertated in er steel trap!
But th' good Lord knows best an'
one day Brother Somers ho teen a
wumoran thet set th whole duramed
universe f slngln "Bedella" an' slch-
like poplar musik! Then ho begin ter
quotin' potry killed his dorg an' got
religiouser'n all git out!
Well t' make a long Btory some
less'n a ppool er rope he up an' got
married an' they do say down In Mis-
soury ho dun erbout right consldorin'
th' gal excepting ho oughter seasoned
ther wind t' ther shorn lamb sost all
tli' boys wouldn't a swallowed ther
stoar teeth gaspln' fer su'priso when
th' weddln' bolls got ter doln' th'
dlng-dlng!
Whon thoy went on ther tower they
cum by tho gieat lakes somehow er
:utho to Shlcago. Thoy cum by
water sosts they could be seasick in
each other's arms fur the fust (and
last) time! Well him wantln' f show
her oft ter excuso hisself fer. not
askln' our opinion ho brung th'lady
oround fer our Inspeckshun. Wo ain't
got nuthln' t' say boln' as how he
seen her fust exceptln' thet she's a
bit o' femernlnlty thet makes a feller
think o' th time when his ol' wum-
oran said "I will" and he wilted. She's
th' kind er joolry thet ain't goln' t'
lot her ol' man git loansum wastlu
his aftekshuns on no dorg!
Well agin' ther boys all erlong th'
line sort er got out nn handed 'em
bokets with ono hand aud tied a can
f em with tho other hand Jest t' make
'em remember what 'twas they wuz
celebratin'. Down f St. Joseph Mis-
soury Bill Williams bein' no relation
o' ourn and probly glad of it he put
er bell outer 'em and scared 'em over
th stute line inter th' hands of Ernes
McGaffey him bein' no respecter of
newly mairiod folks hisself. . After
fritnin th' life most outen 'em 'show-
in' 'em whar th' tunnel caved in and
whar th Masonic Temple turned
'round we cast 'cm lose ter cavort
erbout 'till ther money glv out!
Then we got em uboard a editorial
Injlno and sent 'om back t' i.llssoury.
Here's hopln' thet nothln never will
git atween that thar love o' them an'
thorn Ol Missoury sunsets whar th'
roses is painted on the varlkolored
background in glorious splendor! An
may they alius read In each uthers
eyes thet: "Whomsomever lives true
life is boun' ter love true love!"
This bein' erbout th' wust the't's bin
done t' 'em we bein' all busted up
with brain rheumatiz we're hopin'
thls'll hold 'om fer awhile.
UNCLE BY.
It is not wise to throw bricks even
when out of tho glass house district.
In an Illinois town a bootblack annoy-
ed a man at tho depot. The man pro-
testing angered the vender of shines
who threw a brick at him. Tho target
unfortunately was the superintendent
of the road and he issued an order to
keep all bootblacks newsboys and
other peddlers off tho platforms. Ii
you want the news at this station now
you have to ask tho voluble (?) ticket
agent for it with tho usual results.
Ten years ago tho expenditures of
the New York department stores were
less than one-half of that of to-day.
Twenty years ago it was less than
one-tenth. Thirty years ago it was a
minute fraction. Note how these
stores have prospered and broadened.
Does advertising pay?
in the country town especially the
women do the shopping. Wise is the
advertiser that appeals directly to
them.
A newly married shoemaker is now
using his wife's first cake for a lap-
stone. A hint to the wise is sufficient.
If the girl doesn't know how to cook
sho may have the money to hire ono.
This is worth investigating.
Peace hath its war of conflict. Life
Is a perpetual sally 'gainst tho con-
tending forces of existence.
Every true soldier if he must ho
shot prefers to receive his wound
facing the enemy.
The fishing season is closed but un-
fortunately the law has no jurisdiction
over fish stories.
Affection is not always desirable.
Think of the way the four-year-old
"loves" the cat!
A man seldom feels sure of his per-
sonal appearance when his wife buys
his neckties.
It is Impossible to tell a gentleman
by the frequency of his visits to the
baibet shop.
A boy always has a hole either in
his pocket or his sock and frequently
In both.
A selfish man is the fellow that
takes tho seat to which you tried to
beat him!
A lazy man looking for work usu-
ally prays devoutly that he will not
find it.
War is a mad game that enlighten-
ment and culture seems not ablo to
deter.
How many tous of coal will it take
and how close did you como to it last
winter?
There is only one degree worse
thf.ii civil war and that is domostlc
war.
Tho way to love a womamis to tell
her about it the oftener thej better.
EaBafiBflHflaaTsiH't '
Health
Calumet makes
light digestible
wholesome food.
Economy
Only one heap-
ing teaspoonful
is needed for one
quart of flour.
"Cry Down Credit."
Tho colonel of a British regiment
stationed at Portsmouth has revived
the old custom of "crying down tho
credit of the regiment." Tho diums
and fifes marched to different parts of
the town and the drum major at each
read a proclamation warning- trades-
menvthat men of tho regiment could
not he held responsible for debts over
the value of one day's pay say 25
cents.
It Will Stay There.
"In my family medicine chest no
remedy is permitted to remain unless
it proves beyond doubt tho best to Le
obtained for its particular purpose.
"For treating all manner of skin
troubles such as Eczema Tetter
Ringworm etc. Hunt's Cure has held
its place for many years. I have fail-
ed to find a surer remedy. It cures
itching instantly."
R. M. Swann
Franklin La.
60c per box.
King Solomon's Gold.
The evidences that Rhodesia was
tho country from which King Solo-
mon's gold was obtained are said to
be accumulating. The builders of tho
more ancient portion of the massivo
aud extensive ruins receutly explored
at Great Zimbabwe are believed to
have lived about 100 B. C and to
havo belonged to a race who weve
the gold purveyors of the world.
How's This ?
We offer One Hundred Dollars Reward for any
tM of Catarrh tint cannot bo cuied by Uall's
Catarrh Cure.
F. J. CHENEY CO. Toledo O.
We the understgued. havo known P. J. Cheney
for tholait IS years and believe hltn perfectly boo-
orable Id all business transactions aud financially
able to carry out any obligations nude by blsflriu.
Waldino Kinhan Mabvik
Wholesale Druggists Toledo O.
Hall's Catarrh Curo Is taken Internally acting
directly upon the blood and mucous surfaces of tbsj
system. Testimonials sent free. Trice 73 cents per
bottle. Sold by all Druggists.
Take Hall's Family Pills for constipation.
Better be unborn than untaught
Cor Ignorance is the root of mlsfor
tune. Plato. I
Whale Indulged In Gin.
In the stomach of one of the whales
caught off the coast of Shetland by "a
whaling steamer has been found a
larsra Dutch Kin-bottle. It was in ner.
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icci coaaiuon.
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Twine, W. H. The Muskogee Cimeter. (Muskogee, Indian Terr.), Vol. 5, No. 51, Ed. 1, Thursday, September 29, 1904, newspaper, September 29, 1904; Muskogee, Indian Territory. (https://gateway.okhistory.org/ark:/67531/metadc69968/m1/2/?rotate=90: accessed April 24, 2024), The Gateway to Oklahoma History, https://gateway.okhistory.org; crediting Oklahoma Historical Society.