Claremore Messenger. (Claremore, Okla.), Vol. 13, No. 29, Ed. 1 Friday, July 10, 1908 Page: 2 of 8
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•MJTU, rUMJUUB
<7LAK KMORR,
OKlJk
Whun a woman won't she won't
gad Urn reason she won't I* becau**.
Thu «m«« of HtHkr venom la Increaa
In* In tho practice of medicine, aud lit
price la soaring upward rapidly.
An KnglUliiiiau lias discovered n
new lllumliint Iiik g* P«rhsps It will
throw tome Unlit upon thuee English
Jokes.
Prof. Redllnh of Vienna university,
Who ha* accepted an Invitation to lw-
lure ut Harvard m-xt •prlniK. will not
speak In Austrian
At present tin- 'niiti*M. If w« n>l twU«'
not. hold I lie record for fast origan
travel, but tho 'lea have aspirations In
the same direction
A story It. told «.f u Connecticut
rooster tlmi chewa tobacco nml trie*
tii expectorate like a man. Evidently
tho nature fukers are dying hunt.
If Peary Ih so certain hs could And
the poll* for $26,000, he otmht' to Imve
no trouble in all In mortgaging hla
subsequent lecture trip for tho money.
The French academy, when full, run
tnliiH 40 "Immortals." Two of ihem,
Ludovlc Malovy nml Francois Coppee,
havi> lately provm! their tnoriallty by
dying.
Wo congratulate Hun Francisco on
having a new date. Until now It has
been "since tho earthquake " Hero-
after It will be "since the coming of
the fleet."
Thousands of year* hence, when
sclent1st* are looking for relics of
prehistoric man, probably they will
come across several ancient automo-
biles In Siberia.
Persona whono Incomes do not keep
pace with their aspirations will he
glad to learn that It Is quite correct
now to wear topaites, If they prefer
them to diamonds.
Woman suffrage In Finland Is snld
by a male sclent lit to have Increased
Insanity In that country. We expect
to see this statement mildly disputed,
not to say laid out stiff and cold.
A celebrated doctor says that the
son Is not bad for blondes, as has
been reported. Did the doctor never
see a blonde complexion thBt had
carelessly been left out In the sun?
The Kalamazoo man who was struck
by lightning three times must prove a
great source of encouragement to
those politicians who have held their
lightning rods for a long time without
getting results.
Germany thinks it is entitled to a
two-cent postage with the United
States If Great Britain Is. The cost
of transmitting letters written in Ger-
man is no greater than that of Bend-
ing messages expressed in shorter
•words. ,
At last Homer has mot his only real
rival. The "seven cities" which claimed
the blind bard are outnumbered by
the municipalities which claim the
author of "Casey at the Bat." The
love for really great poetry has not
declined.
PROBLEM OF THE
AMERICAN TRAMP
HOW SHALL VAGRANCY EVIL BE CHECKED?
Laws of Various Stales Haw Proved Unequal to the
Task-Elaborate System for the Cure of Habitual
Idleness in Force on the Continent of Europe-Is
Striking Contrast to the Futile Efforts That Have
Been Made Here in the United States.
N
K\V YORK. The course of the
vug rant'it life Is In a vicious cir-
cle hi reel, park bench, cheap
Inditing house, court, lull, street,
brake-beum, court, Jail, etc.; so It
line*, from month to month, from hand
to mouth, from city to city. More uo
curately stated, the vagrant's course
Is spiral and downward, with accel-
erated momentum toward demoralisa-
tion, disease and death. Along hi*
road are certain "rescue stations"—
( baritnbin societies, missions, curb-
si one breadlines, Industrial homes,
personal visitations In alcohollo wards.
These ate efforts to extend the help-
ing hand, to switch the vagrant from
the circular track to the "straight
ahead line." But generally the mo-
mentum Is too great. Failures are re-
corded far In excess of even Imagined
successes writes O. F. Lewis of the
Charity Organisation society In the
New York Times.
When we seek, by Imprisonment, to
deal with the Individual "vag," what
do we find? Generally Ineffective, in-
adequate, unjust methods of punish-
ment, so futile as to be ridiculous,
were they not so tragic. We find cor-
rectional methods In Jail that. Instead
of correcting, debase, methods as
vagrant as are the prisoners. We be-
lieve that each man who Is able
should contribute his share of the
day's work. Nature abhors a vacuum,
and the community In general abhor?
ihe constitutional idler. If the drone
work not, neither shall he eat. We
believe that crlmo should be punished.
Vagrancy Is a crime under tho law
Punishment is generally and neces-
sarily effected by-the restraint of lib-
erty, within a penal Institution. Vag-
ants are imprisoned generally in Jails
>r workhouses.
But how?
What are the conditions of Ameri-
can Jails?
Do they check vagrancy?
Do they punish justly7
Do they reform?
AN ANSWER has recently been
made public which Is a scathing
irraignment of conditions in a great
najority of American county jails, all
he more scathing and staggering be- onment in the Erie county Jail he
wrong, and offends against the laws of
health. . . Almost all the reports
from Jail* record the dull, monnnton-
mis, maddening tramp of prisoners
walking aimlessly up and down the
corridor. ... It Is tluj path of lunacy
Why not have walled yards In the
open air, partlv sheltered from rain,
covered over with steel wire to pre-
vent radnptT Hut .this plan is rarely
thought of. . . OHrd playing Is Ihe
universal resource for passing the dull
and anxious waking hours."
Many examples are given1 of usees-
slve overcrowding.
"In Birmingham. Ala., 340 men lu 72
cells; 26 women In ten cells. . . .
The Inmates of jails are chiefly of two
classes—those awaiting trial and con
vlcteU mlsdeuiftuittuit. • • •
nary term of corrected mlsdenisan-
snts, vugrants and Inebriates Is *oo
short for any sort of Industrial train-
ing or systematic production. A cgre-
ful atudy of the situation in all parts
of the land han long ago driven many
to the conclusion that we must have
district labor colonies or workhouses
for those convicted of offenses, and
that tlifc term of degenerates must be
aL least two years. If we really Intend
to lit them for useful lives."
THE committee plainly shows that
under present conditions and laws
the county Jul) muM provide for males
and females: children, youth and
udults; first offenders, habitual crimi-
nals. vugaboudH. prostitutes; wit-
nesses held for their testimony; poor
debtors whose crime is their poverty;
Idiots, imbeciles. Insane, epileptics,
persons arrested on suspicion, and
apoplectics whom the sapient pollce-
mun could not distinguish from drunk-
ards. All these, says the report, are
often under one roof and management,
in a building so built that cries and
whispers travel along a corridor with
cages open at the side.
Now. what chance Is there In the
average jail for the reformation of the
imprisoned vagrant? Wre may think
that Jack London draws the long bow
In his picturesque descriptions of life
on the road, but In his tale of Imprls-
American men, according to a dis-
affected continental husband of bj>
American girl, are slaves to their
■wives' slightest, whims. As yet, how-
ever, we have heard of no movement
for the emancipation of down-trodden
American men. The trouble with
them Is that they glory In their
slavery.
Those new words that have been
■written to fit the tune of "Dixie" rep-
resent a total waste of time and labor
on the part of the author, as might
have been expected. Nobody wants
them. Does anybody suppose that a
new version of "Home, Sweet Home,"
ever could supplant the commonplace
but immortal song known by that
name?
Leon Delagrange, the French aero-
pianist, who has Just driven his flying
machine more than six miles at Rome,
■while the king and queen of Italy
looked on, says that his machine now
needs only a few minor Improvements
to solve the problem of dirigible flight.
We have an idea that he will find that
making these few minor Improvements
is like putting on the finishing touches
to make a perfect poem.
When the question of relinquishing
to Turkey some forts on the Midian
coast was under discussion, the late
Lord Salisbury wrote to Lord Cromer
privately: "I would not be too much
Impressed by what the soldiers tell
you about the strategic Importance of
these places. It is their way. If
they were allowed full scope, they
■would Insist on the Importance of gar-
risoning the moon. In order to protect
us from Mars." That was written be-
fore the beginning of the more or less
profitable current discussion as to the
liabitablllty of the next outside neigh-
bor of the earth.
•ause made after a careful Investiga-
tion by a committee of the National
Prison Congress, which does not seek
fensationalism. The following para-
graphs are almost random quotations
from the report:
"If the only or chief purpose of jails
were to keep wild beasts In cages,
most of the jails are well enough
adapted for this purpose. . . . The
never wrote of such horrifying condl
Hons as afe described by the report
of the committee, of which Prof.
Charles H. Henderson of the Univer-
sity of Chicago was chairman. What
chance, above all, haB the detained
witness or suspect, held in the jail for
his testimony, and innocent before tho
law -until he is proven guilty ? What
chance has he of not suffering con-
Long ago Defoe reminded his coun-
trymen, in "The True-Born English-
man," that the Englishman is com-
pounded of many races. The compound
Is more complex in this country than
In any other, and we have high hopes
of the mixture. In a Wisconsin town,
named Roosevelt, which is Dutch, of-
ficers elected were—if reporters and
telegraphers erred not—Strzelewicz,
Cichockl, Szalaj, Zakozewlcz, Swetllk,
Tevlaw, Kedzlorskl, Perzanowski, Or-
■echo w ski, Lemanski and Walter
Tyler. Possibly, suggests Youth's Com-
panion, Tyler Is a misprint for Tylov.
■'■JV.
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7 Pfahtka .
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JIM.
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M1
at
3T
dstsr sad refbrmt Shall wa, (row-
ing Jail conditions, allow Klin to roam
at large? nut the vagrant habit It foa
tared by Idleness, mendicancy and the
absence of prosecution Even as It la,
the uuwllllngness or mauy police nlR
dais or magistrates to prosecute
tramps la well known When the
vagrant I* told to "get out of town or
be run Ift" he of rourse decamps, and
the town flnancea are spared, while
the neighboring community receives
the shifted burden. Yet If the con
vleted vagrant la sent to Jail he lie
cornea a source uf contamination to
other Inmates, and In addition he la
often glad to hibernate or tpond • faw
weeks where warmth, food, Idleness
and the company iif vicious fellows Is
assured. Are we not oftM, by adoiliv
Isterlng the law, condemning the vag-
rant to further depths of degeneracyT
What do the reports of chiefs of po-
lice show? The writer recently re
celved ex ended reports from >0
chiefs, representing K many different
cities, representative of Imge and
■mall muuicipaiifleM The letter*
showed that In most Instances vag-
rants ate committed to Jails, less fre-
quently to workhouse* and In a few
Instances to the penitentiary, liostun.
Lowell and other Massachusetts towns
report sending aome vugranta to the
state farm, where there Is a nlue
months' sentence, In those Jails and
workhouses Ihe labor required, when
there Is any, conaixts generally of
breuklng stone in quarry or lu Jail*
yard, roadmaklng, chnlrcanlug, chair-
making and farm work. Tbla work is
"on paper." There Is little or no ef-
fort mnde to bring reformative Influ-
ences to bear on thos4 serving short
sentences or to tench • trade. Even
at the Massachusetts state farm,
where the workhouse conditions arc
far bettor than in most correctional
|
vagrant, theg woe to the llbsrtr of
(hat vagrant for a long period' Con-
viction la to a depot de mendlelle for
from two tu seven years. Tho depot
de igendlfllte is st Meriplaa, a great
Industrial colony with ereoniiiiodutlons
ft>r about D.nuo prisoners. Here there
neons a classification, the worst ele-
ments being ai night placed In soli-
tary confinement and otherwise placed
under atrlct discipline. Inteuslve la-
bor Is carried on, the work being
graded according tu the physical abili-
ty of the individual Inmates.
The llelglan treatment of vagrants
brings out prominently several facts.
In the first place. Ilelglum believes In
getting vsgrsnts olf the streets snd
highways. Rome years ago ihe talala-
ter of Justice declared that there was
no vagabondage In Ilelglum. This
statement needs Interpreting. There
Is probably fairly little vagrancy
along the highways, because every
vagrant must be appruliendMI and
made to show cause through hla pa-
lters, or by the absence of a record at
nrussels, why he should uot b« aout to |
the depot de mendlclte. The fat* that
Merxplaa contains about 6.000 In-
mates. and that the average period ol
detention Is 18 months, snd that the
majority of the Inmates sre returned
to Merxplas tor succeeding offenses
of vagrancy, shows that vagrancy In
Ilelglum Is not eradicated from the ao-
clal body, but removed as much as
much as iKiitlble from society.
THE Hwlss colony of Wittwyl, which
Mr. Edmond Kelly luts recently de-
scribed In detail In his book on "The
Elimination of the Tramp,' shows that
In a certain proportion uf cases the
Inmates committed to a compulsory
labor colony do not reform and rejoin
the ranka of the Induatrlal army. A
trained English Investigator ststed
GMIiam 3ROO.QS
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THI IALLA0I Of TMt TMIN MAN.
I can it« sll tlisl newt nn<n 4n,
Tlisl Is In rnwiiwin run of things;
I stisvw mvs«4f. niijtir It, ton,
«'sn Wke s clock snd nirml Its sprints
Can ninw lh« lawn at lir«sk «f dsr,
Kutl msny a potior hand I've .twill,
Hut.'o, I've never learned the way
To wear my trousers wtth a belt.
I eifinke uhi ll ilie air la blue.
And I cen blow a dos«n rinse,
goiuetlmes I'm eel at sl«|it Mil t
I,(tew «ili«v men I take my fttnga.
At * . baseball I still plsy.
The swiftest pttrhln* I 'en welt)
But, O, I've never learned ihe wsy
To wear my trousers with a belt.
At fishing I'm a wonder, too.
1 am Hie uiau Insl always brine*
H"ui« *i<i«, when my spoil Is through.
The lamest lt h, the blgfr'i strings.
What inner men can do, I say.
To undertake nn fear I've felt;
Hut I have never learned the wsy
To wear my trousers wltli a twit.
n'KM Vol.
Prlnm, If you you're tliln as I to-day,
If nature stingily liatli dealt
With yen, I need not further say,
1 can't d.pvnd upen a bell.
-Detroit Free Press.
TMB PIMLI IN Hit «M0C.
Pawn aleng a prlmros* war , .
Where senile breeses sweetly blew
A pt ssluilsi fared all Ihe iter
And wore a pefehle In one shoe,
lite face wae Meebene4 by a frown,
II# seemed lu bear a nameleee drsas;
lie heard no muele sifting down
Through leafy brenuhee overhead.
Although ihe world wae at Ha beet,
Willi I'eete untroubled on her throne.
lis carried sorrow In hie breaet
And hopeleesiwee wae In hie lone.
Down elons a primrose way
where senile hreeses sweetly blew I
The pessimist fared all lite ilsy
Ami kepi Ih# pebbl# In his shoe.
-S. K. K isur. lu Dhtcsso iieoord-Heraw.
•HI KNIW~THOSe rmtNDS.
Disconcerting Csndor.
"I was very glad," said Dr. flood-
man, "to ace you In church last Him-
day—glad, and nleo flattered. 1 bad
hardly hoped that my eloquence would
prove more attractive to you than
your regular Sunday morning game of
golf."
"Oh," replied tba man who believed
In being candid at all tlmea. "It wasn't
your eloquence, exactly, 1 have re-
cently been having a severe attack
of rheumuilsm In my right ahoulder."
—Chicago Kecord-Herald.
HCfl CANDID OPINION.
—w
PRISONERS COMMITTED IN THE UNITED STATE8 DURING 1904.
The table classifies the principal offe nses, showing total number of sen-
tences for each offense and perce ntage of each class of offenaea to total
number of sentences, 149.691.
Tsble showing the prisoners committed in the Unitsd States for vagrancy
in 1904, the length of sentences,, and the percentages of commitments
for varioua periods.
customary mode of serving food Is re-
volting, demoralizing and often dan-
gerous to health. . . Often we must
imagine bunk over bunk. In the aame
cell or cage, crowded until the horrors
of stench or suffocation are Indescrib-
able. . . . Under an open Jail system
the filthiest, vilest prisoner punishes
or tortures those who have net yet
sunk to his level. ... The very struc-
ture of the ordinary jail Is radically
lamination and gaining a hatred of so-
ciety that will not die? In many coun-
ty jails the only exercise "enjoyed"
by the prisoners Is in a common large
room, with steel grating separating it
from the surrounding corridors, and
called to Jail parlance the "bull pen."
ARE we not then ip a wretched di-
lemma, we who urge that the
vagrant receive treatment that will
Institutions where misdemeanants of
the vagrant or inebriate class are con-
fined, the industries maintained seem
to be far more largely carried on as
sentences than as chances to earn
a living.
MANY of the cities use the Bertillon
system of, identification measure-
ments. One chief reports asking the
"usual questions," another the "name
and address"-—as though a vagrant's
name and address would be of value!
What a contrast 16 this t6 the elabor-
ate Belgian system for the Identifica-
tion of vagrants, which centers In the
"caBler centrale de vagabondage," a
general Identification bureau at Brus-
sels? In Belgium the process of trying
an arrested vagrant is speedy and
thorough. As soon as the police arrest
a vagrant they communicate by tele-
graph with Brussels. Within a few
hours there is sent back from Brusf
sels by telegraph a full description of
the vagrant and of his previous career,
If anything of the prisoner is on rec-
ord. On the following morning the
magistrate, who is a graduate of the
university, has before him sufficient
material about this particular vagrant
to enable him to form an adequate
Judgment of the case.
Coupled with this carefulness and
*completeness of investigation, regis-
tration, and adequacy of Judgment is
the Belgian system for the punish-
ment of vagrants, which differs so es-
sentially from our opportunist taeth-
ods as to be staggering at first to con*
template. We "bunch" our vagrants
in law. In New York state the man
with no money, no work, and no visi-
ble means of support Is a vagrant.
That such a man Is not often jailed,
unless the case is aggravated by
other factors, is not the fault of the
law, so to speak, but is due to the un
willingness of magistrates to commit
the unemployed homeless, or to the
Indifference of the authorities. But la
Belgium the state of "no work, no
home, no money" is not a crime, un-
less there Is added to that the state of
intentional Idleness.
De Auber—How do you like my
landscape? Do you think I can Im-
prove it any?
Miss Cutting—You might try. You
can't .make It any worse!
recently, regarding Witzwyl, that
there is no doubt that the fact of hav-
ing worked hard for a year or 18
months makes a man apt to get into
the habit of working, aud this is be-
lieved to be the actual result In
Switzerland.
What, then, shall we say regarding
the treatment of vagrancy In the Uni-
ted States? First, that at present it
is thoroughly inadequate. As statis-
tics and the accompanying diagrams
show, G7 per cent, of the commitments
to'penal institutions are to county
jails and workhouses in which the
condftions are often exceptionally
bad. Drunkenness, vagrancy and dis-
orderly conduct were responsible for
more than half the commitments dur-
ing 1904 to penal institutions in the
United States. For these three of-
fenses the county Jails and work-
houses, to which the large majority of
offenders are committed, offer prac-
tically no reformative Influences. For
more serious crimes, such as burglary,
robbery, assault, forgery, etc., there
are reformatories and state prisons, in
which latter institutions some reform-
atory Influence Is felt.
This brief resume of the present
conditions inevitably points to the
necessity of a material change in our
system of combating vagrancy. In
this connection it Is of special Inter-
est that within recent months a bill
has been drafted In New York state
providing for the establishment of a
farm colony upon lines very similar
to that of the Swiss compulsory colo-
ny, Witxwyl. This bill, which has the
approval of the leading charitable so-
cieties of New York city and of sev-
eral trunk lines terminating in New
York, and which will be Introduced
Into the next legislature, provides for
the establishment In New York state
of a compulsory labor colony, with In-
determinate sentence, regular labor,
reformatory Influences and classifica-
tion of prisoners.
A Common Mistake.
It often happens that what is m«r
ly a habit Is mistaken for a doctrine.
Why He Dldnt Go.
The German emperor recently can
celed an engagement to take lunch
eon with Prince von Hohenlohe-Bar-
lenstein, Prince Von Stolberg-Wernl-
gerode, Prince von Solms-Llch, Prince
von Stolberg-Rossla, Prince von Salm-
Hostmar, Prince von Benthelm-Steln
furl and Prince von Salm-Salm. The
people of Germany can't understand
why he didn't go.' It is probable that
he was afraid of getting hyphenated.
—Chicago Record-Herald.
How She Lost Her Prestige.
Mistress (angrily)—How dare you
talk back to mo in that way? I never
heard such Impudence! You have a
lot of nerve to call yourself a lady'
maid.
New Maid—I don't call myself that
now, ma'am; but 1 was a lady's maid
before I got this job.-
Mlitress-You must get dretsed
esrly to-day, Jane, for I have friends
coming to tee me.
Jane—Yus, mum. An' shall I re-
move the humbrellns?
Her Only One.
Mrs. Crlmsonbeak—You ought to be
arrested for making mo go on tho
street with that same old drest an-
other season!
Mr. Crlmsonbeak—Well, dear, you'd
probably be arrested If you went on
tho street without wearing It!—
Yonkers Statesman.
It Might Have Been.
"I think," said the ordinary citizen,
"that I have met you before."
"Porhaps you have—perhaps you
have," replied the long-haired young
man who had at last succeeded In sell-
ing one of his poems to a magazine.—
Chicago Record-Herald.
HOPELESS.
8HOULD BE CONTENT.
LUNATICS SHOW MUCH CUNNING.
The present liberal parliament has
been in existence long enough for the
London cabmen to learn that it is dif-
ferent from its predecessors. An of-
ficer of the house of commons said
tho other day that ten years ago the
yard of the parliament building was
filled every night with cabs waiting
for a fare. Nowadays cabs are scarce,
•ad the motor-cabs do not wait about
at all. Many members
Some of Their Work Known to Hsve
a Scientific Value.
Some of the inventions of the In-
sane are of scientific value. A patient
at Vlllejuif Invented a "paniflcatlon
machine" by combining a bottle, a
plank and small metallic tubes, to
which he had fitted faucets. Having
set up his machine, he produced
loaves of bread the slse cf a man's
head. The bread waa good—so good
that it waa decided to make the ma-
chine known. One day when It was
in action the doctor suggested taking
a photograph of It. The inventor
watched him as If petrified for a mo-
ment; then he fell upon the machine,
wrenched it apart and trampled it un-
der foot. The invention—an exceed-
ingly useful one—was lost, because no
one had seen him make it, and no one
dares speak of It to klm. To allude
to It to to bring on a fnrlosa
lect wax from the polished floors, take
the impression of locks and make
keys from empty sardine boxes, spoon
handles or anything to be found. Dr.
Marie's museum includes a collection
of knives of strange and unheard-of
shapes. Some of them have blades
made from pieces of glass or slate and
set in bandies of corset steels. Ob-
jects harmless In themselves become
dangerous weapons through the in-
genuity of madmen.
Insane sculptors ar$ as common as
Insane painters. The Insane sculptor
hews out coarse statuettes, fantastic
animals, ferocious little horned and
grimacing devils. An ex-mechanlc
carves all his soup bones. That his
old trade Is still in his memory Is
shown by the little screws that be
makes out of the smaller pieces of
bone. He works all day at his sense-
less and ridiculous task. Another lu-
natic, who believes be is the Incarna-
tion of the soill of Beelsebnb,
his time earring toy men out of
•k pato ft his
NO PLEASURE IN THI« WORK.
Spectacle Peddling Evidently Employe
ment to Be Evaded.
"The meanest job of my lean days,"
said a millionaire, "was spectacle ped-
dling. I still see the ssd and scornful
looks, I still bear the reproschful
oaths which that work brought down
on me. .
"It was at the seashore. I had a
case of spectacles for every age from
45 up. I paced the beach and the
board walk.
Once I walked up to a lady and
gentleman seated close together on
the sand.
" Sir and madam.' I said, 'wonld
these interest you? The best and
cheapest brand of old age spectacles
on the market. This pair would be
yonr site, sir—19 years. Lady, will
you try these 64-year onesr
'They reddened and the Ban toM
me wtth an oath to move on. I re-
I
their thoughts brought down from
love to old-age spectacles.
On the board walk I accosted a
pretty girl leading an old man by the
arm.
'Would yonr grandpa be Interested
in these, miss?' I said. 'Best glaa*
warranted, SS-ytsar slse, price—
" Tell him to go, Billy,' said tba
girl.
"And as I want, a hot-corn man
'"That, yon dub, was Go baa Oold*
and bis young bride.'"
For Overworked
After baring done an unusually hard
day's work or undergone some unac-
customed strain sncb as Is'likely tp
leave the muectee sore and stif, rait
It drops at tincture at arnica thee-
oughly la ena-taif glass of water sad
take one teaspooaful of Ike tslxtare
every hoar until relieved. This wit
alva much quicker relief thaa whs*
applied externally. It la also oae 4
Editor (as a manuscript falls on
floor, instead of in the waste basket)
—Even that basket won't accept it!—
Meggendorfer Blaetter.-
Dangerous.
Redd—Don't you believe that
lays are dangerous?
Greene—I certainly do. I broke
down In my automobile the other day,
and bad nothing to do to amuse the
girl but propose to her.—Yonkers
Statesman.
Wife—My dear, you have nothing
to complain of. You have everything
that I want. What more could you wish
for?—Fllegende Blaetter.
Necesssry Work.
Bacon—Your wife's away, isn't the?
Egbert—She la
"And who It her understudy?"
"Her what?"
"Her understudy—who darnt your
socks when sb^s away?"—Yonkers
Statesman.
Tha R«al Thlne.
"A man ahowed me a gold brick to-
dar" —
"Of course you bought It"
"Of course I did nothing of the
kind. It befcmgett to. tba United
States tfhasupr." — Baltimore Amer-
ican.
Economy Begins at Name.
hear frtor teaching your ton to
play draw-poker. Dp you think that's
wise??
"CerUlnlf. He's boond to
from some one. If he learns from me
it kkqm tlio m*noy b tha family."—
Ufa.
ifjt Aiqmintid.
"How do yon like yonr new neigh-
bors?"
"I baveat called on them. I didn't
Uke the looks of their furniture as It
wae being carried U."—Detroit Free
A*
de-
Wants ths Big Ones.
The Major—About 700,000 demi-
johns are made yearly In Oils coun-
try, but the largest sites are im-
ported.
The Colonel—Yes, we all teem to
hanker after Imported thlnga, don't
we?—Yonkers Statesman.
Can tuch Things Bsf
She—I tee a cooking achool and a
nursery are among the Innovations to
be tried soon In Seattle.
He—And Is there no Society for the
Prevention of Cruelty to Children in
Seattle, I wonder?—Yonkera States-
Dldnt Broaden Him.
"They say that travel broadens a
man," aaid the dark woman.
"Well, I don't know about that," re-
plied tha light woman. "My husband
has been a conductor on a trolley car
for seven years, and see bow thin he
1st "—Yonkers Statesman.
NOT NEWS TO HIM.
■A
Wan—What business ar* yrfa la
aowt
Broad—Tm a stock broker.
Watt—Thar say there's a goad deal
of BOttJ ta
Well, there's a good dsal <*
!—riDig Jo—al.
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Reference the current page of this Newspaper.
Smith, Clark. Claremore Messenger. (Claremore, Okla.), Vol. 13, No. 29, Ed. 1 Friday, July 10, 1908, newspaper, July 10, 1908; Claremore, Oklahoma. (https://gateway.okhistory.org/ark:/67531/metadc178205/m1/2/: accessed March 29, 2024), The Gateway to Oklahoma History, https://gateway.okhistory.org; crediting Oklahoma Historical Society.