The Exponent. (Ralston, Okla.), Vol. 2, No. 17, Ed. 1 Saturday, August 25, 1906 Page: 2 of 8
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fj. A. SMITH, PuUli«fc*r.
HEAD COVERED WITH HUMOR
NEW STATE NEWS.
Sulphur has voted water works
The Garber carnival will be held on
the «th, 7th and 8th of September.
The Farmers' Union in Oklahoma
now claim a membership of 165,000,
and more lodges are being organis-
The postofflce at Avoca was discon-
tinued August 15th, and patrons of
that office will be served by the office
There will be a Farmers' Union
cotton vard at McComb this season,
which will have the patronage of
about six local unions.
Tulsa's city council has provided
In its street railway franchise for
three ceut fares for school children
under 18 years of age.
REMARK MEANT AS WITTICISM
Friend of Whistler Denies Great
Artist Wae Conceited.
"At Pont Aven, in Brittany," said
a New York painter, "I met Mortimer
Menpes, who is chiefly famous for
his friendship with Whistler.
"The hotel at Pont-Aven is a mu-
seum of superbly carved antique
Breton chests, armoires, and closet
beds, and a gallery of superb paint-
ings that were presented to the pro-
prietress by Alexander Harrison,
Penfold, Pauline Palmer, and other
"In the salon of the hotel, 1 heard
Menpes talk one day of Whistler.
•"Whistler,' Menpes said, 'was not
a conceited man. He was a Joker.
As Jokes, not as serious speeches,
most of his remarks were to be
•"Thus a lady said one day to
-Do you think, Mr. Whistler, that
genius is hereditary?'
'"I can't tell you, madam,' Whist
ler replied. 'Heaven has granted me
WANTS THE CORRECT PHRASING
Man le Puzzled Over the Right Way
to Ask for Liver.
GOT WILD WELCOME
MAORI8 GREET VISITORS WITH
Proceedings, On* Would Imafllne,
Rather Trying to the N*rv** of
• Party of Western Tourist*.
This Is the week of the annual old
soldiers' reunion at Aline, Woods
county. Among the speakers are ex-
Governor Ferguson, Dennis Flyuu, I\
P. Gore, Wiu. Cross, and Hev. Hodge.
The directors of the Kay County
Log Rolling association yet at Ponca
City and selected Monday, September
3 as the date of their next annual
log rolling. The big picnic will be
held In Ponca City, and Woodmen are
already arranging for an interesting
program for that day.
Within a very short time the Fort
Smith & Western railway will be run-
ning through passenger service to El
Reno via the St. Louis, El Keno &.
Western, the Fort Smith having re-
cently acquired a controlling Interest
lu the Guthrie to El Reno property.
A .young Indian by the name of Coon
was struck by a freight train at Te
cumseh Junction and so severely in
Jured that he died shortly afterwards.
He was drunk and failed to get off
the track before the train reached
him On the 4th of July another
drunken Indian. Jim Morris, was killed
by a train near the same place and
In the same manner.
Van S Abernathy, brother of the
United States marshal, succeeds
Charles Carpenter as federal Jailer at
The Baptist Assembly Association
is to be incorporated aud have perma-
nent summer encampment headquar-
ters at Sulphur, the Commercial Club
of that place having donated twelve
acres of ground to the B. Y. P. U. for
The Greer County Farmers' Gin
company, of Mangum, has been chart-
ered with $10,000 capital stock; the
lucorporators are George Klrkoff, J.
D. Martin. T. E. Meryman. J. A. Mc-
Waters and J. P. Morgan, all of Man
A colony of Mennonites Is to be lo-
cated somewhere in Oklahoma, possl-
blv in Blaine county where there is
already a large settlement of this
strange religious sect.
Rains of the present week have
caused widespread damage at Purcell
aud points below. Many small bridg-
es 'vere washed out and railroad tiaf-
lie has been Impeded.
Kaw City will have a grand corn
carnival on August 16 and 17th. El-
aborate arrangements are being made
to entertain the large crowd.
"I wish," said the chronic fault
finder, ' that butchers would hit upon
some uniform rule for writing out
their notices of calf's liver. The pres
ent diversity of styles Is embarrass
Ing, and apparently convicts a fellow
of grammatical error every time he
buys a pound of liver. Some shops
say they have 'calf's liver' for sale,
others make a specialty of calves'
liver/ while still others with a tlnet
regard for singular and plural num-
bers call attention to their excellent
'calves' livers.' One butcher In Co
lumbus avenue goes so far as to ad
vertlse 'calf's livers,' but unless that
sign is misleading the animals he
handles must be freaks, therefore
they need not be considered. What
I want to know is, What is the gram-
matical rule Jn regard to this table
delicacy? If I want more liver than
one calf can supply Bhould I plural-
ize both terms and ask for 'calves
livers'?"—New York Globe.
Old French Bonfire.
Probably the strongest detail record-
ed of the old midsummer eve bonfires
is one in connection with those that
used to be lighted in the Place de
Oreve in Paris. The main constituent
of the bonfire was a tree, which the
king was accustomed to fire with his
own hands, the ashes being after-
wards carried home by the people for
good luck. lxrniB XIV. was the last
klug who did his part. A mysterious
Item of earlier times was the burning
In the bonfire of a barrel, bag or bas-
ket full of cats. The registers of Paris
show that a hundred sous were paid
to an official for having provided dur-
ing three years (1571-3) "all the cats
required, as usual, for the fire, and
also in one year, when the king was
preseut, "a fox, to give pleasure to his
majesty, aud for having provided a
great bag of linen in which the said
cats were." *-
Ideals of Family Life.
Dr. Alcott opposed the keeping of
a servant because, as he said, a
servant destroys the domesticity of
family life. Dr. Alcott further told
the young wife that she must "pre-
pare" appetizing dishes for her hus-
band; must see that his house was
kept neat and clean; that the children
were properly and nicely dressed,
and that the wife and children should
all be ready In the parlor to welcome
with smiling faces the man of the
house when he came home In the
afternoon. Emerson said that Dr.
Alcott was the greatest Intellect since
Plato. Emerson gave Dr. Alcott a
letter to Carlyle, and wives of the
present day will probably applaud
Thomas to the skies for sayiug to
Jane; "Never let that old cabbage
In here again."
A traveler In New Zealand tells of
a native welcome. His party drew
near to the central home of the tribe
of Maoris: "Aa we rested beneath
the parapets, we were startled by a
horrible yell and round the corner of
the stockade appeared a ferocious
figure, tattooed, red-painted, befeath-
ered and naked, except for a very
brief waist fringe of dangling palm
fiber. Hie eyes rolled till the whites
only were seen, then he thrust out a
long and snaky tongue and grimaced
fearfully. Shaking a wooden spear
In his band, he swiftly cast It at us,
then turned and rushed toward the
village. Just as the spearsman
turned one of our young men, who
had rapidly divested himself of all
but his waist shawl, darted out in
pursuit and we followed at a more
dignified pace. The entrance to the
city was barred by a body of
armed men, crouching still as death,
on one knee, each holding a gun, butt
on the ground, barrel sloping toward
us. We advanced until we were
within twenty paces of the warriors.
Then all at once, at a wild cry from
a chief on the right, they Jumped to
their feet, leaped high in the air,
with their feet doubled under them
like deer, and with one voice liter-
ally barked out a thundering chorus.
This way and that our martial hosts
bounded, brandishing their loaded
rifles In time to the chant Halting
abruptly, with an earth-shaking thud,
they fired a volley of ball cartridge
over our beads.
"Another volley reverberated from
hill to hill and the bullets whistled'
over us. Then the brown warriors
fell back and a gayly dressed band
of women, with green leaves wreath-
ed about their brows, and waving
shawls and leafy boughs, advanced
with a gliding semidance and chanted
their ancient welcome song. When
the women's song ceased, out to the
front danced six girls—a group of
vividly barbaric, yet not Inharmoni-
ous, color—appareled in loose crim-
son roundabouts and short gowns of
georgeously flowered print, their
brows bound about with red handker-
chiefs. which held In place the black
and white plumes of the rare hula
bird and the Iridescent feathers of
the long-tailed cuckoo, their cheek*
dabbed with red ocher paint, green-
stone pendants and shark's teeth
hanging from their ears.
"These barefooted nymphs, hands
on hips and heads thrown back,
glided into the measure of a dance,
to the music of a shrill monody
chanted by a white-haired, tattooed
old lady. Then all at once the chant
ended on an unexpected high note
and the performers stopped, breath
less and glowing all over with their
self-evolved emotions. Broad flax
mats were spread out for us on the
green and after speeches of greeting
we were regaled with pork, preserved
birds, wild honey and potatoes, in
quantity sufficient to have satisfied
a starving Russian garrison.
Bothered with Itching for a Long Time
-Kentucky Lady Now Completely
Well—Cured by Cuticura.
"After using Cuticura Soap, Olnt*
ment and Pills, I am very glad to say
I am entirely relieved of that Itching
humor of the head and scalp which I
was bothered with quite a length of
time. I did not use the Cuticura
Remedies more than three times be-
fore I began to get better, and now
I am completely well. I suffered with
that humor on my head, and found no
relief until I took the Cuticura Reme-
dies. 1 think I used several cakes of
Cuticura Soap, three boxes of Oint-
ment and two vials of Pills. I am
doing all I can to publish the Cuticura
Remedies, for they have done me
good and I know they will do others
the same. Mrs. Mattie Jackson, Mor-
tonsville, Ky., June 12, 1905."
Foreign Born Men of Fame.
Of the 300,000 Canadians eugaged
In business or following professional
pursuits in the United States many
hold prominent posts. Whoa Who
in America" mentions 245 Canadians.
Allowing one eighth of those born in
Great Britain but brought up in and
therefore rightly to be credited to
Canada the number of Canadians be-
comes 276. or 2.3 for every 10.000
Canadians In the United States. With
this may be compared the British rate
per 10 000 of 2.2, that of 2.1 for the
Dutch,' that of .5 for Swedes, and
that of .9 for native Americans (black
and white), or 1.9 for native white
Grocer Was Getting Even.
"That was tit for tat with a ven*
geance," said Walter Christie, the au-
tomobilist, apropos of a quarrel be-
tween two French chauffeurs. "It re-
minds me of a grocer I used to know
In Paint Rock. This grocer went over
to the Jeweler's one day to get a new
crystal put on his watch. The latter
as he fitted and cleaned the crystal
suddenly flushed. He bit his lip and
frowned. His hand trembled so that
he could hardly go on with his task.
Finally, handing the watch to the gro-
cer, the Jeweler Bald In a restrained
roice: Beg pardon, but didn't I Just
see you put a couple of rings and a
scarfpln in your pocket?"
" Sure you did,' said the grocer,
boldly. 'When you come to my place
aren't you always putting things in
A WINNING START.
"Adding Insult to Injury."
The phrase "adding Insult to In-
Jury" originated from a fable by
Phaedus, a Roman author who lived
In the reign of Augustus Caesar, and
whose writings were flrat ,ntroduce<^
in modern literature In 1596 at
Rhelms, France. The fable Is called
"The Bald Man and the Fly, and Is
as follows: "A fly bit the bare pate
of a bald man, who endeavoring to
crush It, gave himself a heavy blow.
Then said the fly. Jeerlngly: You
wanted to avenge the sting of a tiny
insect with death. What will you
do to yourself, who have added in-
sult to Injury?"'
A Perfectly Digested Breakfast Make*
Nerve Force for the Day.
Everything goes wrong if the break-
fast lies in your stomach like a mud
pie. What you eat does harm If you
can't digest 11—it turns to poison.
A bright lady teacher found this to
be true, even of an ordinary light
breakfast of eggs and toast. She
"Two years ago I c infracted a very
annoying form of indigestion. My
stomach was In such a condition that
a simple breakfast of fruit, toast and
egg gave me great distress.
"1 was slow to believe that trouble
could come from such a simple diet
but Anally had to give It up, and
found a great change upon a cup of
hot Postum and Grape-Nuts with
cream, for my morning meal. For
more than a year I have held to this
course and have not suffered except
when Injudiciously varying my diet.
"I have been a teacher for several
years and find that my easily digested
breakfast means a saving of nervous
force for the entire day. My gain of
ten pounds In weight also causes me
to want to testify to the value of
"Grape-Nuts holds first rank at our
Naue given by Postum Co., Battle
"There's a reason." Read the little
book, "The Road to Wellville," la
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The Exponent. (Ralston, Okla.), Vol. 2, No. 17, Ed. 1 Saturday, August 25, 1906, newspaper, August 25, 1906; Ralston, Oklahoma. (gateway.okhistory.org/ark:/67531/metadc169089/m1/2/: accessed November 17, 2018), The Gateway to Oklahoma History, gateway.okhistory.org; crediting Oklahoma Historical Society.