The Tulsa Chief. (Tulsa, Indian Terr.), Vol. 4, No. 20, Ed. 1 Tuesday, July 30, 1907 Page: 2 of 8
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1
John Henry
In
\'Bohemia
'Hy HVGH Me HUGH
[GlQTgm V. Hobmrt
Boys! let inp put you wise! If
you want to keep ofT the griddle
don't ever try to 6how your shy little
lady friend how the birdies sing In
"Bohemia."
You'll get stung -If you do.
For the past six months Clara Jane
has been handing out lilnta that she'd
like to have me take her down the
line and let her t>h, listen to the band!
In one of those real devilish New
York restaurants.
She Intimated that she'd like to sit
In the grand stand and hold the watch
on those who are going the pace that
kills
She wanted to know if 1 thought
•he could toy with a tenderloin steak
In a careless cafe without getting the
call down from Undo William.
Clara Jane's Uncle William hands
out tho lesson leaflets In Sunday
school and wrestles tho (lolden Unit:
to a tlulsh every Sabbath.
During the week he conducts u fire
•ale.
I told her 1 thought she could and
•he was pleased.
“I'm Just crazy to take lunch, some
time, among the Bohemians'!” she
gurgled.
1 told her I thought she'd have a
happier time If we tramped down to
the tunnel and butted In among the 1
Italians just as the 12 o'clock whistle ,
blew, and she threw both lumps at me
good and hard.
A few days ago I took her to the I
matinee at "'Ike New York" where j
you have to pinch off only 50 cents
and then you're entitled to slosh j
around In parlor furniture and eat up '
•bout eight dollars worth of comedy, j
That "New York" thing is Immense
—believe me!
Everything else has faded away.
After the show we thought we'd pat •
the pave for a few blocks and who ,
■bould we run into but Bod Phillips. 1
Hud belongs to the Grand Dodge of I
Oood Fellows.
So far as I can size hhn up the
Good Fellow puts in It’ hours a day j
trying to stab himself to death with
gin rickeys, and the other 12 are do- *
voted to yelling for help and Ice- j
water.
This is not a tap on the door. Nix ,
on the knock.
dering a selzer lemonade, so It didn't
make much difference, anyway.
"What Is he?" she whispered after
a bit, "a painter'”' •*
"OhJ he's a painter all right,” I
said. "When some one b ads him up
to a tub "
Water colors or oil*" she asked
“Oil,” 1 said. "Fusel oil."
"Has he ever done any good tiling?”
said she.
Wes,” 1 said; "Bud Phillips.”
"Oh, I'm enjoying this so much!
Who Is the man with the fawn-like
eyes and the long hair at that other
table?” she whispered.
Me was the night watchman of the
apartment house next door but 1 gave
her an easy speech to the effect that
he was Hill Beethoven, a grandson of
nhl man Beethoven who wrote the
wedding inarch and “Mah Rainbow
Ooon" and “Father Was a Gentleman
When .Mother Was Not Near," and
several other gems.
Sin- thought she was In Bohemia
and having the time of her life, so I
let her -dream. y
In the meantime Budd was busy try-
ing to put out the lire in the well Ikey
used for a neck. t
Every time a waiter looked over at
our table Bud's roll would blaze up.
Clnr» .lane concluded she'd broaden
out a bit ou Art and the Old Masters
. V?
rl
r)vzi
SHORT HORN BREEDING
IN GREAT BRITAIN
ety of Great Britain and Ireland show
the immense number of ultimata that
have been exported duFing the year
11106, and the majority of these ani-
mals have been sent to South Ameri-
ca, more especially to the Argentine
republic. Indeed, the great demand
for them la that CQUUtry Is the .princi-
pal cause of the boom In shorthorn
cattle. One would Imagine that In
consequence of the severe drain on
the herds of Great Britain, caused by
the exportation of so many of their
finest animals, a depreciation would
be found in the quality of the stock to
be seen at shows, sales and on breed-
ers’ farms; but, as a matter of fact, i swing of the pendulum In due course
such Is not the case.
In spite of this increasing demand,
tho standard of excellence attained by
tho shorthorn breed Is quae as high
as, and perhaps higher than, it ever
was before. Breeders find that it pays
them better to devote a large portion
* \
u
tholr cattle. As is the case with all
Rtock, the mating of the parents ami
the rearing and the management of
tho calves have a great deal to do
with the fact that young bulls and
heifers arrive at such a state of per-
fection us Is only attained in Eng-
land.
If shorthorn breeding were unprof
ltable, one would soon find that own-
ers would turn their attention to some
When the Head Waiter Deals Out the
Check. Ikey Is the Busiest Talker
in the Bunch.
so she asked Ikey if he liked Rem-
brandt.
Ikey looked at her out of the cor-
ner of one eye and said, “Much
'bilged, but I'm up to here now!”
Thun he went to sleep.
Bud was beginning to see double.
Every once in a while he'd stop trying
to whistle "Stillie, Jly Hot Tamale,”
and he'd look over at Clara Jane and
hand her a sad. sad smile.
Then he'd press money In the wait-
er's hand and wait for his music cue.
Clara Jane had about decided that
Bohemia was away up stage, but I
It Isn t my cue to aim the hammer, wouldn’t let go. i wanted her to
When It comes to falling off the
water wagon I can do a bit of a
•peclulty In grand and lofty tumbling
id
Q.
i ly
W
“What
Troupe Is
WltftT"
get the lesson of her life, and that's
where my finish began to get busy.
Tom Barclay waltzed Into the sub-
way, saw me and In a minute ho was ,
making the break of bis life.
“Why, hello, John Henry!” said
Toni, "say, I saw her to-day — and
she's Immense! You've got a groat
eye, old man!"
1 tossed off a few wicked winks on
that great eye of mine but Tom went
riglil along to tbo foiioral.
"Lizzie B. Is a peach, John Henry!
Y'ou'vo got Uie eye for the good girls,
all right, all right!" he chortled. i
Clara Jane began to freeze. 1
I felt like a boiled potato In the I
hands of an Irish policeman.
"She's every bit to the good, old
man!” Tom turned It on again; “she ,
makes all the other birds chatter In |
the tinge. And .her feet—did you evqr j
Me Aueh feet?" I
Jp#
vV *•*
Sir?:*
:.rm
4
f :
"
■****«■ •*
BBSS.-.
Attending to Maternal Duties,
more lucrative branch of farming, and J them calculate on a future for their
deterioration in our herds would be , cattle; (1) They knew that the con-
the result. The demand, too, in for- tinned production of animals bred to
eign countries is for young animals In I give the maximum of beef might
the pink of condition; therefore, it is sooner or later lead to the production
rarely that the exporter will take out of females which would only yield tho
shorthorns over a certain age. In con-
sequence of this the older cows and
bulls are, generally speaking, left in
the old conntrv, and in many cases
minimum of milk, and no doubt to a
great extent this has been the case In
some herds. (21 The dairying Industry
lias enormously increased of lato
thes_e latter .are the parents -of some years. The trade in dairy produce
now in the United Kingdom is esti-
mated at £70,000,000 sterling, annual
of flie best stock produced.
It is an age of early maturity, and a
bull or heifer of great excellence at
two or three years old will often, after
having attained mature age, be sur-
passed by a stable companion who
was probably inferior In appearance
when a youngster. Thus many good
animals are overlookedTkFtii* foreign-
er, and fortnnate 1 y ,rei»ati»■'g.t home.
I looked at Clara'Jane’s face, but: m *- ft- -——it
■ for j Thes” f believe to be Mute Of the n-a-
theae was no light in the wind
nr*
that pels a lovd hand from si! the
membars of tlit* High fide association.
8o nix on the knock.
Ills' father cut out (be breafling
business about two y*,-ars ago and k ft,
Bud $4OD.OOtt and ».,lung dry aprll ou
the inside. .
Bud has been In the lake «ver since,
"As you were!" s.iitl Bud. "Why,
.j sons forvtbe aMittnucd -Btiprenmcy
___________ of
the Britisfr ahorthorn; but I am con-
vinced.. that, in the main, It is due to
the common sense of the British
value, of which £30,000,000 is im*
ported from abroad, and in conse-
quence of the latter fact dairy cattle
are wanted for exportation. (3) Dairy
farmers in England were at a loss to
know where to procure registered
shorthorn bulls from cows of a milk-
ing strain. They had bred for several
years pedigree shorthorns which
Ctm>d yield a plentiful supply of milk,
Sful which were at the same time
Capable of laying on flesh when dry,
J^nd the next step for them was to
-cibaked Tkntu
bretto was cutting up with.
If Clara Jane had hailed him m>‘
finish would have hopped over the
fence then and there.
But she didn’t, so 1 Introduced them
and quietly tipped Bud off to the fact
that it will be a case of wedding bells
when M illie gets a wad—be nice! bn
nice!
And Bud woke up to the occasion.
"Y’ou to the carryall!” he said. "I’ll
float you down to Muttheinier’s and
we'll get busy with the beans!"
"lie's out to cough for a few cook-
ies," I explained to Clara Jane.
"I never heard of Muttheimer’a be-
fore,” ‘raid Clara Jane, on the side.
“Y'our luck lias given you a thrown- I
down,” 1 said.
"But 1 do hope it’s Bohemian," she
sighed,
"Sure!” I said. I hated to break j
her heart.
Mutthelmer's Is one of those eat-
eries where the waiters look wise be-
cause they can't speak English.
If you ask the a a question they
bark at you in German.
It's supposed to be Bohemian be
cause then 's sawdust on the floor and
the tiles wear pa urnas and say, "Pro-
sit!" before falling In the stuff that !
you swallow to-day uml taste to-mor-
row.
Bud bunch--s bis hits on the bell and
the low forehead has a Fitzsimmons
hug on the order when Ikey jliuceil- ,
plzensteln crawls Into Iho harbor and
drops anchor at our table.
I don't know how ikey over
pressed close enough to get on Bud's
staff.
1 spoke his name fast when I Intro-
duced Ikey to Clara Jane but she was j
busy trying to live a swUt life by or*
•
"You certainly picked out a warm
I proposition when you put your arms
, otuunU Lizzie B. and I'm your Iriuud
for life for hauling me up in the char- erideSnor to explain i (jjroTe to home and to foreign dairy-
Viol Jjtdu you-*'Whitt u ?uu hav*J* . mMl^an,ng«r .. i* v*#' men, that such was the case, for al-
j There is afgjtajrg Ann some par-
i J whlspefM £ the great
al] j •ahorthorn Thmiry. whether it be
Scotch, Booth, Bates or any other line
of blood. The owners Of the particu-
lar, strain of cattle In favor for the
tilde being teflp a rich harvest, and
are tempted to part with many of
thajLr bust speclnieua. In this case
if. i/«n„ ii,,,,. , . ,, ; l-ut out npUUug! mud -the prize
it a .lolin Henry’ touch thumbs, nd , , ....
„ , ,, , ... idiot, well drink to Lizzie B. What 11
pal: juul then In a side .sweecU be I , , . . , . __ A~
your holy friend have?”
wanted to know what troupe* flie note I • , -
\\ hen ( inra Jane arose she was a
mass of igjcles.
"Mr. John Henry!
the kindness
escort me
though the milk supply of our large
<*fnfers of population in England is
mainly obtained from shorthorn cows
pfiOt necessarily registered), or their
•grosses, until lately, I venture to say,
^ew. If any, foreign breeders of dairy
rattje had any idea that such was the
case, the shorthorn being regarded
abroad as a beef brand only.
Stump Puller and Barb-Wire Reel
‘Mr. John Henry!
the Kindness to
Car?”
Will You Have
Escort Me to a
she said, giving me tho glittering gig-
lamps, “then you may return and dis-
cuss your affairs of the heart at your
leisure.”
Stung!” said Bud, bringing hjs
band down en the table so vigorously
that Ikey w.'kp Up and ordered an-
other highball.
Me-tn tbo badlands! It took me
three mortal hours to convince her
that Tom was only talking about a
horse.
Hereafter when Clara Jane yearns
for something swift 1 11 take her down
and let her watch tho trolley cars go
by.
(Copyright. 1»C1, by C. W. Dllltncltam Co.)
Country Where the Dairy Type of That Breed Has Been
Highly Developed—By F. N. Webb.
GAHSGQGE). SHXLGS
SIDE LIGHTS ON MYTHOLOGY.
1 he records of the Shorthorn Soci- ( what happens? Do the breeder* of
‘why
the other descriptions immediately
sell out their own st<x-k and rush in
trying to buy up and produce the
popular strain? No! Kuowiug that
such a policy as this would be fatal,
they hide their time. Doubtjegs they
look round to discover the reason why
this particular branch of shprthorns
Is so sought after, and If they dis-
cover that it Is due to the inferiority
of tljelr own strain of cattle in some
particular point, although they will
not openly acknowledge it, they en-
deavor to breed so as to make good
any deficiency that may exist; and,
, as Is nearly always the case, the
“Slater," asked Me.-pomene,
art thou so ftjoomy?”
"Because,’ said Calliope, who. In
her capacity as the muse that pre-
sided over eloquence and epic poetry,
had flone a hard day’s work nt her
des< reading manuscripts apd firing
them Into tha waste basket, .“1 atn op-
pressed by a foreboding that all my
tabor* have gone for naught. I shall
die utterly unknown, and my name
will perish (rum thu earth!’,,
Llttto did sMe think that the most
diabolical and soul destroying Instru-
ment ever devised for the purpose of
torturing the ears of mankind would
send her name screaming and toot-
ing down the ages!—Chicago Tribune.
INFORMATION.
Show me the road to I,azyvlJlv—
B can’t be tar away—
Where shadows linger cool and still
And Idle sunbeams play.
Where rustling leaves are wldeperlna
soft.
And skies are mild and blue,
And pla- Id cloud banks drift aloft.
With nothing else to do.
Oh, Laxyvllle's a dear obi place;
It's over’Dreamland way;
Tito route . iHit tilltWutl to trace
Upon a summer day.
Tile nodding roa# that, blooms In state.
The wild llwiM-n -jit the bill.
All generously mdlente
The way to l.aSyvUle.
—Washlngthh Star.
GRIM HUMOR.
will bring tho trade back to their own
variety, which has thus Indirectly
benefited by Its Beason of adversity.
But the most extraordinary exam-
ple of the manner in which the Brit-
ish shorthorn breeder looks ahead
and endeavors to keep his stock to
of their time to the improvement of i the front is furnished by the breeders
of pedigree dairy shorthorns. There
can be no doubt that the highest
prices in late years have been given
for the most heavily fleshed animals
procurable, and It Beems absurd that,
while there has been an almost un-
paralleled trade for this class of cat-
tle, a minority of shorthorn men
should have embarked on the breed-
ing for milk and not for beef; but
these are the reasons whieh made
Not So Bad.
"lie's the most pestiferous little pup
In town, sir!" exclaimed the augry
neighbor; "and I tell you you've got
to keep him at home, or I’ll take a
club to him the next time he comes
over here and tramples my flower
beds, and"--
"You dare to so much as shake your
little finger at that dog of mine and
I'll knock your head off!" shouted the
other man.
"Who said anything about your
dog? I mean that youngest boy of
yours."
"Oh, well, that's different. I’ll give
him a talking to, and whip him if he
bothers you any mote.”—Judge.
Ready to Go the Limit.
"I have here,” said the long-haired
visitor, ",7 little poem on spring."
“All right,” said the editor, "leave
It. I’ll publish it. Nothing we can
do to spring will be too cruel, after
the experience we've had this year.”
—Chicago Record-Herald.
"I never do have any lurk. Now
a raging toothache has begun just at
the moment that 1 was going to tak»
my life, and the nearest dentist live*
at least three leagues from here.”
HIS LAST WISH.
Poor Jiml
Aunt Luclndy was in deep distress
over the loss of her son Jim, and &
neighbor sought to console htr, say-
ing;
“Don't grieve for him. Aunt Luclndy.
He has gone to a lan 1 flowing with
milk and honey.”
With a dismal countenance, the old
darky replied:
Jltn never did like milk, an’ honey
always made him sick.”—Lippincott s,
Magazine.
MW'
Discouraged.
"What's the matter with Bards-
leigh? He looks discouraged."
"He worketl for three years on
what he thought was going to be a
luminous poem. The critics are pub-
lishing their review's of it under tho
head of ‘Light verse.' "—Chicago Uectr
ord-Herald.
Doctor—Have you any last wish?
Patient—Yes, 1 wisil I had some
other doctor.
It Makes a Difference.
"Who Is that large, fat, overdressed,
pudgy woman In the box?" asked the
stranger at the theater.
"That? Why, that is Mrs. Gottalot.
You know she is worth about 50 mil-
lions, and-”
But the stranger had turned to the
friend he had brought along and was
whispering;
"Do you see that plump lady
In the box—the one with the beautiful
clothes and the diamonds? That Is
the famous Mrs. Gottalot.”—Judge.
Smell It?
"Where is your automobile depart-
ment?” asked the man entering the
big 'department store.
“Follow your nose.” replied the
clerk near the door.—Y’onkers States-
man.
Discouraging News.
Yveast—Dimizulu, the Zulu chief,
has a graphophone with which he en-
tertains his guests, and also an organ
of English build on which ho him-
self performs.
Crlmsonbeak—-No wonder mission-
aries are getting more scarce.—Yonk-
ers Statesman.
Sure a
“What’s become of the 'living pio-
tures’ w'e used to see In vaudeville
shows?”
"Dead.”—Cleveland Leader.
TOO AWFUL TO CONTEMPLATE.
Told By the Face.
Mrs. Church—I met that little boy
who lives next to you, yesterdayv • l
could, tell he, was a good little boy, by
bi* face.
Mrs. Flatbush—Oft; I suppose yrts,
terday wit' one of the days he'd
washed his face!—Y’oukers States-
man.
Scorn.
"So your husband lost his money on
a race horse?"
“No,” answered young Mrs. Torkins.
"He lost it on an aninlal he thought
was a race horse."
A Kentucky farmer sends a sugges-
tion'lor a machine for pulling sprouts
and small' stumps, with a little dig
glug. Also one for taking up barb
wire, one of tho blest convenient ar-
rangements on the farm. Grub Puller.
—Old binder truck wheels, axle IS
Inches between wheels, made of 3x0; i
lever 12 feet long, reinforced, as
shown In cut; wagon tongue: piece of
old wagon tiro, with short hook, and
four feet of short link chain, ring in
A |
one end to hook on. Two men can
null A sapling through.
No. 2 is for moving barb wlro fenc-
ing. Two old buggy wheels, axle four
feet long; any old scrap lumber will
make frame work; roller two and one-
half feet between bearings, and project
ac Crank will work outside of wheel;
work crank on either side; tension on
wire pulls cart backward. The Home
and Farm says there Is no patent on
these.
His Status.
“Does your friend 1 Just met follow
any calling?”
"No; he calls a following. He’s the
megaphone man at the theater.*—
Baltimore .American.
She didn’t Care.
"May I call you Mabel?” he asked
at their second meeting, pretending
to be badly smitten.
"If you wish to; but my name is
Gertrude.”—Chicago Record-Herald.
:,;>Lady (giving out tracts)—I must
confess that I cannot imagine how
you enn appear in public in a costume
like that. Whatever would people
think If I came out like that?
You it g Lady—I really dread to
tliiuk!
Made Mad by Confinement.
Bajton—I see a Henry S. Brice of
Patten, Me., claims to have found *a
frog fn a century-old bedpost which ho
recptiily cut up.
Egbert—I suppose, when released,
the frog appeared to be hopping mad?
—Yofikers Statesman.
The Advantage.
The Optimist—Surely it is worth
something to a man to 'ive in a coun-
try where he dare call his soul his
own.
The Pessimist—Well, yes, I suppose
he can get more for it, when he comes
to sell it.—Puck.
Self Committed.
Mrs. Cutetly—You never take me
anywhere, while your friend Simpkins
is always taking his wife to the the- I
ater.
Mr. Cutely (absently)—I dare say;
1 wouldn't mind taking her myself.
Among Newspaper Men.
Wright—I’m working on the Bugle
now.
Penman—That paper is no good. I
was on It once.
One Indication.
“Do you think that Edith Is much
In love with Bob?"
"I don't think she cares a snap for
him.'
"Why not?"
"I saw her eating young onions to-
day.—Milwaukee Sentinel.
Exclusive.
Miss Bobbs—Is your washerwoman
particular?
Mrs. Snrbbs—Particular! Why she
"Oh, well, it Improved after you left won't wash for anybody but the best
it, )ou know!"—Yonkers Statesman, families!— Detroit Flee Press.
I
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Henry, George. W. The Tulsa Chief. (Tulsa, Indian Terr.), Vol. 4, No. 20, Ed. 1 Tuesday, July 30, 1907, newspaper, July 30, 1907; Tulsa, Indian Territory. (https://gateway.okhistory.org/ark:/67531/metadc1173616/m1/2/: accessed April 25, 2024), The Gateway to Oklahoma History, https://gateway.okhistory.org; crediting Oklahoma Historical Society.