The Daily Transcript (Norman, Okla.), Vol. 7, No. 61, Ed. 1 Tuesday, June 10, 1919 Page: 3 of 4
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The Daily Transcript, Norman, Oklahoma
Uncle Josh Says
Written By Unclc Josh
I Dear uncle—I have been read- ]
ing your column for some time and
enjoy it preatly, and think you arc
a great writer, also a well learned
man. So please allow me to ask
i you a private question, you can
answer through your column if
i you wish. I have heard so many
ladies speak so highly of their
model husbands, and can you des-
i eribe to me in a clear way the
i meaning of a model hysband?
I am going to send you some of
my poetry later and let you pub-
| lish it in your paper.
Yours very much, BERNICE.
Thanks, Bernice, fer your kind
kompliments u has said bout me.
u has cum to me fer such infer-
mashun. Now, Bernice, dont go
an git al larmed over my answer,
i know jist how you feel bout this
thing, an i feels it my duty to tel
u the truth bout this matter. A
model husband is the small imi-
tashun ofthe real thing.
For tht poor little
Poodle dog had died.
(Lino. Opr.: Just because Uncle
Josh found one of those old maid
school teachers that have come in
for the summer school, that would
speak to him, and let him take her
to the show—that one upstairs—
Saturday night, he thinks he is
the whole cheese around this of-
fice, but if you want to know who's
who, come down and see. No, it
isn' tJosh, not by a long shot.)
Wei, hear i be, i aint drowned
yet but jist 1 more inch and i'll be
walkin on my toes.
u know, folks, i has cum to the
Jtonklushun thet su mthing ouras
to every body in life but it jumes
faster if u help your self.
While out in the park 1 day last
week thar wuz sum men an wo.
men havin a piknic an dinner wuz
spread out on the eroun readie to
eat an the parson said grace an
every body started in to eatin so
as they wuz passin the chicken (0
boy) roun a ladie asked a little
boy what part of the chicken he
would like best after kinder twist-
in his toes round in the ground
looked up and said, "Why, ladie,
i likes al of it.
Answers to Kustomers.
Yes, Hazel, a man is the most |
important peace of furniture in
a woman's air castle.
Reginald, if u jist trust to luck
u wil be luckie if u git iny thing
hear is a letter thet i got in the
mails this mornin from a phemale
kustomer, as follows.
Pumpkn Center, 31 may 191'J.
My dear uncle josh, Norman.
(Delayed by censor)
i notice thet thar linotype opera-
tor is talkin bout my bizness. now
if he gits fresh agin i is goin to
sit down on sum body.
i c by the papir thet they is
gittin this sewin bizness down to
I keen point, i c a feller what livea
i out hear north of town wants 20
acres of ground sewed up in mil-
let. Now chets what i kalis fancy
j work an besides fer 1 i is goin to
| be thar an c thet kind of sewin fer
j i figgers as how it is goin to be
J sum job to sew thet much ground
I its time fer 'nother kar to cum
j in guess i wil rite my poetry an
j klose fer the day.
The poor girl sighed,
j Oh, how she cried;
Time: About three weeks
High overhead an aeroplane
droned, causing a minority of
the persons on Main street to
risk their cosmopolitan as-
sumption of boredom in frank
"Old stuff" they muttered
petulantly to their more re-
served companions, annoyed
by the instinct which betrayed
The aeroplane droned on,
Thirty seconds later, on the
same street, a woman attempt-
ed to adjust her stocking. The
woman was young. It was a
Immediately all traffic
WORTH THE MONEY—Cleve-
land county farms and Norman
city property listed with me for
sale. Two 5-room modern bunga-
lows just completed, $2750.00 each
6-room house, garage, hen house,
etc. west side, $1500.00. Other de-
sirable properties. See W. T>.
Roane, Norman, Okla., phone 738.
TO FRANCE TO
HAVE FOE QUIT
New York, June 9,—Opinion
among the twenty-one officers
and 1,520 men of the 345th field
artillery, the principal organiza-
tion aboard the transport Ken-
tuckian, which docked here last
Saturday night, is that it was
rough travel all the way from Ok-
lahoma and Texas to France, only I
to have the Germans quit on them i
before they had a chance to pull
But, at the same time, it was
mighty fine to feel the soil of the
United States under foot again.
Everybody agreed to that from
Col. George L. Wertenbaker, a reg
ular army man down to one of the
three mascots, all of which are
dogs, one a native American,
another a naturalized American,
of Pomeranian ancestry, and the
third a German without even his
Dog Wears Service Stripes.
The American is a pup of great
intelligence, but of dubious ances-
try, whose name has been mis-
laid, or fell overboard, or some-
thing. The Pomeranian is a pro-
American named Metz, who sports
two service stripes and a wound
The third dog, owned by Major
E. S. Thatcher, is what is techni-
cally known as a bad actor in mil-
itary circles. His principal sport
consists of trying to bite dough-
boys when their backs are turned.
Major Thatcher is sure that his
German police dog is unruly more
because of innate iniquity than en-
Crown Prince Left Him.
When the crown prince, travel-
ing light and rapidly toward Hol-
land and leaving Germany flat,
started from Treves, the German
dog, then known as Koenig, stayed
behind with bared teeth, along
with many others with which the
prince was ond of associating. On j
St. Patrick's day a German lieu- |
tenant, apparently the officer of
the royal hounds on the staff of j
the crown prince, gave Koenig to i
Major Thatcher, who was busy I
doing police duty in Treves. In
honor of the day, Koenig officially I
became Pat, but actually in spirit [
and action he remains Koenig. ,
Special chocolate almond bars,
also milk chocolate bars and choc-1
olate marshmellow bars, each 5c
—U. S. Tubbs grocery.
10 lbs. any kind beans for only
$1.00.—U. S. Tubbs, phones 31 and
Have you bought that furni-
J. Ross Bridgewater
203 West Main
We are prepared to furni
estimates and complete
install Hot Air Heati|
Plants. We handle
famous Round Oak Moil
air and the Moore Br|
you are going to put inj
heating plant we will
glad to give you figures I
the complete job.
All Work Guaranteed
Bring Us Your Old Worn Out Caiings
We will make you an adjustment on any make of casing you have
We handle the best lines of casings and tubes made.
HOODS. RAC1NES, FIRESTONES
Hokzschue Motor Car Company
Phone 28 107 E. Main
We will deliver these and install anywhere within five miles
IPFHtV.tr ■y.Tr-'H.r'v -
GET A HOME
WHILE PRICES ARE LOW
One six room house.
One seven room house
Both nicely located. Either can be owned for
$3,750.00 Better hurry.
We have two very nice farms priced right.
McDANIEL & MATTHEWS
June 11, is your last chance
to buy clothing at 1-3 off
this season. If you havn't
looked over these values in
dependable wearing ap-
pared, you have missed a
chance to save money.
Size 34 to 40. No larger.
And styles for young
and older men.
Lots of good patterns
day is the last day
Copyright 1918 Hart Scliaffacr & Marx
Enjoy the Delicious Flavor of the
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IMPORTANT NOTICE—Every can of Karo I* rrarked
with exact weight in pounds of syrup contained. Do not
be miftled by packages of similar size bearing numbers only,
and having no relation to weight of contents.
Corn Products Refining Company
P. O. Box 161 New York City
W. R. ADCOCK, Sales Representative
S4 A. O. U. W. .. uilding Little T.cc- , ' 'r.
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The Daily Transcript (Norman, Okla.), Vol. 7, No. 61, Ed. 1 Tuesday, June 10, 1919, newspaper, June 10, 1919; Norman, Oklahoma. (gateway.okhistory.org/ark:/67531/metadc114070/m1/3/: accessed January 16, 2019), The Gateway to Oklahoma History, gateway.okhistory.org; crediting Oklahoma Historical Society.