The New Era. (Davenport, Okla.), Vol. 7, No. 47, Ed. 1 Thursday, December 30, 1915 Page: 4 of 8
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nor roads but Lincoln County
people would not choose to spend
their lives under such conditions.
We perfer Lincoln Uounl$on1y
we would make it better.
After a vlBit to a well-known ento-
mologist. whose wonderful micro-
scopes have proved tliat there Is al-
ways some living thing to be found
graying on the last uf tin- minutest
cr*aluj«s last seen, a New York w riter
turned to hlui and said: "1 came here
htJlevlug myself to be an Individual.
I leav* knowing myself to be a com-
The Modern Girl.
There are girls whose Idea of do-
mestic science Is to make a sufficient
number of social engagements to sat-
isfy mother with the thought of their
popularity, while mother does the
housework. — I-ouIsvllie Courier-Jour-
Ut wis a very stout, (olly-looklng
woman, and she was standing at the
corset counter, holding In her haml an
article the was returning Evidently
ker attention had been suddenly drawn
to the legend prl'ited on the label, fot
she was overheard to mtti'.nur'
" 'Made expressly for John Wann
maker.' Well, '-here! No wondoi
they didn't fit mo!"
Street Car Amenities.
"I would get up and give you my
seat, miss,'' said the ruddy-faced man
In tbe crowded car, "but I dou't fee!
It to be my duty. I «m old enough to
be your father." "You hold your lige
and your seat remarkably well, sir,"
replied the young woman, grasping a
•trap as the car lurched.—Hoston
By ''Farmer" Mitchell
As a Philosopher Sees It.
H la claimed that the phosphores-
cent keyhole has been replaced by
•ne with a raised rim that makes
U easy for even the most unsteady
hand to force tbe key into it. At the
nnt time the only keyhole that will
fully meet all the nocturnal conditions
will be the one that gets out of Its HH H
frame and foet downtown and hunts over rough roads, 1 lie Dr. hats
lor Ha owner.—Cleveland Plain lJcaler. consented to take care of my
J teeth if 1 will tuKe care of the
roads upon "The Bettei u ay."
Last week we wore in Chand
ler and talkdd good roads be-
cause thai in what people warn-
ed to talk about. We niei
Banker E, L. Conklm who said
he had been reading our articles
about good roads and was inter-
ested. He gave us tive dollars
asking that we use it in the im-
provement of a certain road in
South Fox Township. Our
good looking gin man Mr. Lewi
of Davenport has pledged
twenty live dollars for the same
road, so wo had better get busy
along that line. When a'Gin
man ami a Banker get hitched
up together the road will he
made dragable and dragged.
uVe will get to these roads as
soon as we can and do as- much
as we can for them v\ ith the
means at our disposal We ex-
pect to do one third more work
.villi the means lit xt year than
we have this.
W,e visited the Dental parlors
of Dr. Louein. was busy as
uguul but took time to write us
a check tor three dollars. Thank
you Doctor we will come often
upon the same mission. The Dr.
has a car and while it isu't a
Ford he cannot afford to drive
The ex-blshop of Manchester, tb
late Doctor Moorhouse, was one of the
happiest and wittiest of churchmen,
and was never more pleased with him-
self than when telling a good story
One of hie favorites was that of the
old lady who startled a missionary on
Ills return from India with a question
which showed how dangerous a little
knowledge is. "Pray, my lord," said
How They Talk.
A young man has filed a divorce
action because hlg wife cannot cook
■ke his mother used to. Most young
men who talk that way have been
raised in an orphan asylum.
Wisdom From Uncle.
"Dar aln' much chance foil a man
out o' work," said Uncle Eben. "when
he reads everything In de paper ex- j ^tuatlons, to the delineation of coarse
he, "Ib it true that in India you call tept de 'help wanted' advertisements." j 0,l(burgtB 0f passion and to a diction
Errors of Dramatists.
The early English dramatists (be-
fore Shakespeare) were led to form an
erroneous conception of tragedy. Id
order to secure for It its due impor-
tance and the greatest possible effect
they exaggerated the tragic element to
such a degree as to make it hideous
and horrible, and to accomplish this
they had recourse to the most forced
the female converts zenanas and the
male converts bananas
Tide Affectt Artesian Wellt.
| The effect of the tide on artesian
Have Small Detire to Roam. 1 wells is unusually pronounced in the
Famous for Us (lsh, the little Island Philippine islands, and particularly in
"which was unnatural, forced and bom-
Usefulness In Growth.
Michel Angelo said . "The more the
marble wastes, the more the statue
grows." It Is painful to see the chisel
eat away the precious stone, but if
grace and beauty follow, the process
Is worth while. Many of our losses
are only the chips of stone that must
fsll awav before the Image of the I,ord
appears in human life.—The Watch-
"The greeting 'How sre your
doesn't seem to uie to represent any
siucers and sensible Inquiry, re-
marked the mail who thinks liatd
about trlflet. "That is true," replied
Mine Cayenne. "When 1 meet sev-
eral people I know 1 am always tempt-
•d to lay 'why' Instead of how.' "
of Mar ken, on the Zuydcr Zee, is in-
habited by a sturdy folk who have no
desire to travel, Indeed, so satisfied
are the people with their little island
homo that many of them die without
ever having seen any other part of
No Koad to Riches.
After looking over the life history
of some of the wealthiest men in the
world, we have about reached the
conclusion that none of them got rich
by saving tobacco coupons.—Toledo
the Batangas province. A well lo-
cated at Bauan, 298 feet in depth, and
flowing 50 gallons a minute at a
height of 18 inches above the earth's
surfuce at low tide, at high tide flows
g-,0 gallons to the minute, indicating an
Increase of 400 per cent over the flow
at low tide.
Answer to a Correspondent.
No. Mr. Bosbyshefl, you must not
confound bellona with bologna. The
ono belongs to the ago of myths and
the other to the sausage. The bellona
Is made chiefly of hot dogs of war,
whereas tho bologna—well, never
mind what tho bologna is made ot
Shut your oyes and eat It, and be con-
tent with the thought that, w hatever
their origin, It Is constructed of little
pieces of something, while the other
A Solar Plexus.
"Your apartment, sir," said the cyni-
cal flathunter to the stupid janitor
with a cold in his head, "Is net at all
what you advertise It to be. but, as
for yourself, I cheerfully admit that
you tive up to the specifications, for
you are the finest specimen of a large,
rheumy flat I have ever encountered.
Whereupon he sped out into the cold
world, leaving the janitor a prey to
As to Suspicion.
"Suspicion." said Uncle Eben,
"mighty often consists in realizin'
wliut you'd bs tempted to do if you
had de other feller's chance."
Not a Creolt to the Community.
We wouldn't like to be classed as a
knocker, and yet we feel it our duty to
call attention to the fuct thut our town
calaboose is getting to be a mighty
shoddy looking affiilr. There is hsrd-
ly a self-respecting man In town that
would be willing to spend a night lu It
as It Is now.—Atkins (OUla.) Chronl-
On the Safs Side.
"Why are >ou so anxious to bo
friendly with old Smuthe"'" wo aalt
our acquaintance "Even if ha wero
your friend he wouldn't do anythln.<;
for you." "I know that." replied our
acquaintance, who occasionally ties up
his money lu stocks. "What I want to
do la to bave him so friendly with me
that he wou't do anything to me."
Wish some one would take care
of my pocketbook while I take
care of some other roads.
We called upon Judge Garrett
who gave us a dollar and a smile.
Both were appreciated- Shall
trade the dollar for labor upon
the roads but will keep the smile.
Shou|d the Judge ever call me to
serve upon the Jury in his Court
I shall pay him—in faithfulness.
We called upon K Jacobs and
made some plans with him about
the improvement of the roads
neai his farm in ..South Fox.
5rle saiil all right 1 am with you.
Call upon me for a donation
at vour pleasure Thats enough.
Jacobs will come across with lus
full shaie for roads.
We called upon others who
gave neither a smile nor a dollar.
The work on tho roads this
I weuk is taking a Holiday vaca-
tion. A few are at work hut we
note that the old time enthusiasm
is gone. There is plenty of work
to do and plenty of mt n to do i
but not now We are picking
Where He Shines.
A diplomat is supposed to be a
master in the art of breaking bad
Accidents on British Strectt.
About 100 street accidents a <lay oo
-ur lu th° whele of Great l.ritaia.
Well to Remember.
•Tie only time you's justified in be
In' a kicker." said t'nele Eben, "is
w hen you'a in swlmmin' "
The treasury of America lies In
those ambitions, those energies, that
cannot bo restricted to a special fav-
ored class. It depends upon the in-
ventions of unknown men, upon the
originations of unknown men. Every
country Is renewed out of the ranks
of the unknown, not out of the ranks
of those already famous and powerful
and in control.—Woodrow Wilson.
Guite a Possibility.
A man met another, and while not
remembering who he was, but feeling
certain that he was acquainted with
him, held out his hand and said: "I
am sure I have met you somewhere."
"No doubt," was the reply. "I have
boon thero often."
Ctiarms for Good Looks.
Cn St. George's day, Serbian ladies
evoke tho a'd of charms as a weans
of improving their looks The girl who
wishes a white face places a bouquet
of flowers under a white rose tree
and allows it to remain there for a
night; whereas those who prefer rosy
cheeks place blooms under a red rose
tree, and In the morning the flowers
thus "charmed' are thrown into their
Tbe countries having the greatest
number of people 100 years old, or
more, tre as follows, in their rank:
Roumaula, Bulgaria, France, Great
Britain, Germany, United States. Bul-
garia, with 4,000,000 population, has
3,300 centenarians, while our oountry,
with 100,000,000, can show less than
one fcvndred centenarians.
Mighty Amazon River.
The Amazon is 3,914 miles in length,
rising within 70 miles of the Pa-
cific ocean and flowing clear across
Charles the Second, for whom tha
earl of Rochester made this epitaph,
"Never said a foolish thing and never
did a wise one," could convey a re-
proof with wit and gentleness. When
Penn stood before hlui, with hla hat
on, the king took off his own.
"Friend Charles," said the Quaker,
"why dost thou not put on thy hat?"
"'TIS the custom of this place," re-
turned the king, "that never more than
one person should be covered at a
George is fond of Mother Goose
rhymes. His favorite is "Old Mother
Hubbard. One day he begged his
mother for candy. She thought be
should not have it and refused. He
looked at her an instant, then turning
away with a sigh said: "And so the
poor dog had nore."
Might Be Either.
Miss Climber—"That man is always
running down other people." Mis3
Ascum—"Scandal or auto?"—New
It may get so some time that a wom-
an who hag to dust the family Bible
will be considerod a household drudge.
Guessed What Donation Was.
A certain usher in a village church
had a way of his own of dealing with
cases of doubtful charity. One Sun-
day he came around with the bag to a
gentleman of doubtful open-handed-
ness. This worthy, remembering, no
doubt, that one should not publish
one's good deeds too widely, concealed
his donation in his close-shut flat am}
reached for the bag. whereupon the
collector, deftly withdrawing it before
he could reach It, said in a stern whis-
per: "Give it to me, sir. One has just
come off my waistcoat."
From Maxims of Marcus O'TutL
A habit of*lolling in the Lap of Lux-
ury does not help a man much when
he finds himself lying face downward
on the Knees of Chance.
When a person has use for a long
envelope and none is at hand, two
small envelopes will answer the same
purpose as well. Cut the right end
from oue small envelope and tile left
end from the other, and place one
inside the other bo that the open £nds
lap, then paste them at the edge. An
envelope of the desired length can be
manufactured in this way, and it will
look almost as well as a regular long
How He Was Interested.
Benevolent Individual—"Yes. sir: I
hold that when a man makes a little
extra money hlr first duty is to make
hi* wife a present of a handsome
dress." Stranger-j" You are social
philosopher, 1 presume?'' "No, I'm a
dry goo:'s me/chauts."
'i.atjics tin' geu'l'men," said Sam
Johnson to the invited gi f ts who had
filled his cabin to overflowing since
8 p. m.. "I'm mighty sorry to have to
tell you all that there ain't goin' to
bo no party tonight, 'cause that white
man what owed me 13 cents ain't
taid me yet!"
A Pennsylvania girl has won the
prize that the American Society for
Thrift recently offered for the best
definition of thrift, says the Youth's
Companion. "Thrift," slio wrote, "'is
management of your affairs in such a
manner that the value of your posses-
sions is constantly being Increased.'
The definition may seem trite, but
tbe truth It expresses needs constant
emphasis. Saving money on one thing
to waste It on another is not thrifL
Wanted a Change.
Tho little boy had a bad habit of
-u:i!t t; oS, so his mother tied him to
i! ihesline and just let him play
\Ionm the clothesline, and said to
tin: "Mother will have to tie you
jst like a little dog until you learn
o stay at home." This remark was
vet-heard by his little sister and
'her, who were playing close, but
.rter about ten minutes time the other
liliie boy tired of his girl playmate
ami said to her: "Olga, won't you
!>le<is!' be the dog a while? I want
Ti dy t play wiff me."
One day a week the beggars of
Codta Rica are privileged characters.
That is, on Tuesday they are allowed
to beg from shop to shop. It is the
custom for business houses to pre-
pare for the weekly visit of the mendi-
cants, and to hand over to them small
coins or articles of little value. In
some instances v 'vre merchandise is
given away tiio beggars peddle it
about the poorer r,uarters and so earn
a few cents apiece.
Something of a "Snap."
Joseph had just started to kinder-
garten and therefore was required to
go only half a day. The little boy
next door saw him home one after-
noon and said: "Don't you go to school
any more, Joe?" "Oh, yes," Joseph re-
plied, "but I only have to go In the
morning. Ain't I got it simple?"
Holland's Busiest Mar,.
">n a sign over a barber's shop at
i>rum. Holland: "Parent Won ten
ids donkeys on hire like his father
Is pigs smok'-a hams, and occupies
iinself with aVl kinds of swinish de
ail work: also shaves and cut3 hair
«cept on Sundays."
Black Foxes Hard to Raise.
Cannibalistic tendencies developed
in captivity by that valuable fur-bear-
er, the. black fox. have proved a seri-
ous drawback to the fox-raising indus-
try of Prince Edwards island, whers
300 farmers are engaged In the busi-
ness. Pups are frequently eaten by
their parents, and there are also In-
stances of females being killed and
partially eaten by their mates.
Only Four Tailors!
I am aware that if you search ths
world over you will only find four
tailors' cutterB who can turn out a sat-
isfactory pair of trouserB, and that
these four are resident in the Admin-
istrative city of Londin.—Ford Madox
Mupffer in London Outlook.
"I hope," said Mrs. Corntossel, "thai
you'U be careful not to take any coun-
terfeit money while you're in town."
"I never bother about suspectin' my
fellow iuen," replied her husband. "If
I study out a piece of counterfeit
money it's impossible to offer it to
anybody without my hand tremblin',
but If I pay no attention it's about
us easy to pass it on the next feller
as It was to pass it on me."
All the Difference.
Whether a man has excusable or
Inexcusable faults depends almost en-
tirely on whether you happen to Ilka
bim or not.
Same Old Sandwiches.
"Nothing but caviar sandwiches,"
complained the man in the depot res-
taurant. "Why do you have nothing
on sale In the way of sandwiches but
caviar?" "They don't show coal dus t,"
responded the waitress, br'eflv—Puck.
For True Prosperity.
When th re is perfect sincerity— j
up the odds an I ends and getting! *lien rv"rv man ,s t"1ft to h,mself-
j t _ i .i when every one strives to realize \hat
^ thlnkfl the highest rectitude—then 1
How to Win. -
Thlt Is an age of specialization. my
Soy, and Uie only men who succeed
is a big way are those who pick out
tom* particular line of work and live
with it uatll they get to know mo(e
about It than most other fellows Con-
centration, coasistent and persistent
Tort in one direction Ib the surest
r >ad to success. You'll never win In
• big way—except, accidentally—If
, ;*u scatter your energies.—Leslie s.
ready for progressive work thv
first of the year.
lu It.oking at our hook we lind
that C. N. Seward has donated
sixty six dollars in work on the
•"Better Way." C. Oliver comes
•ext in line. Seventy one dol-
lar and lifty cents in cash for
road building upon the "Better
iVav." This money has all been
used in-hiring men. All team
things prosper.—Herbert I
"What is your son going to be when
ho grows up, Mr. Jigthorpe?" asked
the visitor, patting little Willie on the
head. "Well, really, I don't know yet,"
replied the proud parent, "but from
the size of his appetite I think he has
a decided bent toward the beef-pack-
At least a quarter of the continent
of Australia has never been explored.
Its neighbor. New Guinea, tht largest
island in the world, is known only in
small part, although It may bo filled
with undeveloped riches.
"Coiy" It Hardly the Word to Ute
"Of course." said Mrs. M. T. Cack- [
ler, "It is real nice in the newspapers j
to describe the new Muehlebteh ho-
tel as coxy and homelike, but I should
call a building with a tea furore aud a
cafo centurion, with tnarble floors and
pillows of lapsus linguae and male-
faction, and with gleaming ch "tl-
Cure for Rusty Needle.
Rusty needles can be remedied by
placing the needles lu coal oil for a
Canada's First Province.
The province of Ontario is fortu-
nate in the abundance and variety of
Its natural resources as well as In
the variety of Its principal product".
Though second in area to Quebec
among the provinces of the dominion,
Ontario easily rar !cs first In agricul-
tural, manufacturing and mining prod-
ucts and second in the lumber it>
l k has .been donated. One of | cleers Impending from the doomed
he contributors s..id that just! a «r, H' deal n,ore rotund tUau
. i,i coty. -•-Kansas C'lty Star.
Mountains That Are Magnets.
The mountains of Porto Rico ara so
magnetic that they attract surveyor's
plumb lines, and it has been found
that some il surveys are Incorrect
by half a ti ' i or more.
'•lie look at one of ihu hills tha
has Been graded p ud nun for hit:
contribution Mr. Stacy has
When laying matting. It Is not al
ys necessary to cut it in order to ih*en very helpful in the matter
f corners and alcoves. It may be . f siting funds. When Stacy
'.e ter to do so In very small spaces. ' ... ,
! often moistening the matting u after money to build roads
I ,end to be better than cutting. Soft- he gets it. We hope he will jiO
I thut. It can then be bent with- a(,ajn aru] fcet 1) gOlljg. A gl'OW-
breaklng, and makes a neat, sub .
_nUal edge. ni« child is a hungry one. It re-
tjuirea food. The roads are
grothy. It lakes money to sup-
port them. Schools and
churches and roads are all use-
ful. Non self supporting. Tho
building of the school house aud
church aud road is not all. They
must all be maintained.
There are places where they
do not have schools nor churches
Opinion Plainly Expressed.
The rehearsal bad not gone at all
t, please the stage director, who. at
I close, severely and unjustly crltl-
i 'i d the lesdlng man. In conclusion
I said: "Say. do >*>u think I have
• a a stage director for fifteen years
for nothing?" "I ciyi not say as to
that,' answered the actor suavely,
"but If you haven't, you have cheated
the mansgtnient "
About aiming high An Atchison 1
muu aimed to have accumulated |
enough property by the time he was
fifty to retire. He Is not far from
fifty now, and his consuming ambi-
lion Is to have a week's salary in his !
rocket when he collects his wages for !
the uext week. — Atchison (Kan.) !
Damage Done by Lice.
There are many species of plant
lice. One of them is familiar as a
destroyer of rose bushes Another,
known as the "green bug," attacks the
wheat plant. In 1907 il devoured tho
equivalent of over one thousand mil-
Msta. Pump for A^jt- *-"s. ]jon loaves of bread In Texas and Ok-
Fren :;n;:in has invented a small lahoma alone.
metal air ptnnp that can be fitted to
any atomi" r when the rubber bulb
hn- become useless through cracking neason tor Hand-Shake.
This restores the atomizers useful- ! Handshaking has a military origin,
nr = ar.d vi.l wear a long time. j |n par]y times when soldiers met, to
! convince one another that no harm
— i was Intended and that they held no
Self-Sacrifice j weapons, they extended aud grasped
The Young Man—"As a nutter of I each other's hand as a token of good
fact I think I've done rather well, i will.
You see, I've given four cousins and .
an uncle to the army, three nephews
to tbe rivy aud a sister and two uuat*
to the K *i Cross organixation."
"Of course," said Mrs. Twickembury,
"her life is the very Antietam of
everything that I've been used to."—
Monster Whale's Dainty Diet.
The blue or sulphur bottom whale
is oue of tlie largest animals that has
ever existed on earth. Although its
mouth is so large that a dozen men
can stand upright in it, its throat is
only cine inches in diameter. An-
other curious thing about this enor-
mous cr< uture it that its diet con-
sists chiefly of tiny crustaceans—
shrimps three-quarters of an inch
The pilchard fishermen of Cornwall
watch the movements of gannets; for
ns soon as they see a flock they know
that a shoal of pilchards is at hand
and get their nets ready. By their
flight they know whether the flsh ars
at the surface or deep down.
A reporter on a country paper had j
visited the court for a number ui U y< >
In succession without raising a story
and he complained: "What's the re j
son there Is no crime stulT around j
here any more, judge?" "Kalnt tell, >
bub, lecti n th' constable Is gltlln' a ;
leetle bit laxative," answered the Jus- j
Proving an Axiom.
Silence is golden, for haven't for-
i tunes been made out of stills?
ne nxea it Alt mgnt.
"Unci Henwick!" she exclaimod.
"Aren i you ashamed of yourself ta
eat all that bauana without offering at
least part of it to the little girl?" Bud
looked a bit uncomfortable, but after
a. moment's hesitation he answered:
"It's all right, grandma; I said 'ex-
"Today, for the first time, 1 was
Have a Care.
A New Jersey man who has been
sayruc that his head is a block of wood j really delighted to hear my neighbor's
has been sent to an asylum, so be care- P'an® going " "Something worth lis-
ful what vou sa\. even if your cold (tenlng to, 1 suppose?" "I should say
docs make vour head feel like a hub- • I heard the installment „,en tak-
bard squash.-Boston Globe ! 11 away."—Musical America.
Abroad and at Home.
The fellow in the movie show wh«
laughs loudest ut the picture In which
a woman is chasing her husband
around the house with a rolling-pin is
the same lad whose wife makes him
go out In the back yard when he
wants to smoke a cigarette.—Cincin-
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Tryon, W. M. The New Era. (Davenport, Okla.), Vol. 7, No. 47, Ed. 1 Thursday, December 30, 1915, newspaper, December 30, 1915; Davenport, Oklahoma. (gateway.okhistory.org/ark:/67531/metadc110036/m1/4/: accessed February 22, 2019), The Gateway to Oklahoma History, gateway.okhistory.org; crediting Oklahoma Historical Society.