The Hennessey Clipper. (Hennessey, Okla.), Vol. 19, No. 32, Ed. 1 Thursday, December 24, 1908 Page: 2 of 8
The following text was automatically extracted from the image on this page using optical character recognition software:
C. H. Miller, Pub.
Living Up to Youth.
"How do you keep so youthful?"
somebody, says a London correspond-
ent, recently asked KlnK Edward VII.
Thereu x-n his majesty is alleged to
have replied: "The secret Is, to s"r-
rousd yourself with a younger genera-
tion than your own, and to live up to
it." The story may not be authentic;
for royalty, even when genial and pop-
ular. does not permit itself to be cate-
chized in any such tactless, free-and-
easy fashion. Hut the king uiight have
made the reply truthfully: and it is a
true saying, whether he said it or not.
Two Americans of t>0 odd, friends in
earlier years, met after long separa-
tion, and one, who was an old man
and admitted it. said, almost fretfully,
to the other, "Why are you so young?"
The other, who had been for half his
life the head of a public school, looked
toward the splendid building that shel-
tered a thousand boys and girls. "With
that great wave of vouthfulness beat-
ing up against me all the time, how
can I grow old?" he answered. The
schoolmaster would have been war-
ranted in using the words attributed to
the king. Encompassed by youth, and
glad to be so, he "lived up to it." That
would mean, perhaps, says *he Youth's
Companion, that he clung to his early
enthusiasms, including many which
aging men might term illusions; that,
while he thought and spoke sincerely,
he kept a generous belief in others;
that he refused to brood over the past,
made much of the present, and looked
always hopefully toward the future.
For living up to youth means cherish-
ing its spirit; and upon the spirit of
youth Time hesitates to lay a wither-
Not a Meddlesome Commission.
The first hearing of the Commission
on Country Life, held at College Park,
Md., served to dispel some erroneous
notions as to the purposes of that
body. Prof. L. H. Halley in an address
explained that the commission has no
idea of "investigating" the fanner.
The design is not to go about inquir-
ing officiously and offensively into mat-
ters which are really of a private na-
ture, but to get at facts which can be
useful and valuable to all concerned.
For some reason, says the Troy (N.
Y.) Times, there have been attempts
to create the belief that the commis-
sion is likely to be meddlesome and
unduly prying. Nothing could be far-
ther from the intention, and a state-
ment by way of explanation from a
man of Prof. Bailey's character and
standing is quite sufficient to set mat-
ters right. Prof. Halley Is one of the
most successful teachers of practical
farming in the country, and those as-
sociated with him on the commission
are workers along the same lino. The
result of the commission's efforts can-
not fail to be highly valuable to agri-
Lately an educational expert stigma-
tized American women the laziest in
the world, and as bringing up their
children In the same path of slothful
avoidance of all trouble and effort.
Now a western man, speaking at a
meeting of a patriotic society, declares
that the wuuien of the day have de-
teriorated, and that few would follow
their husbands into privation and dan-
ger, as did the wives of the pioneers
of American history. It is easy to
make these wholesale, superficial
charges and the ease, apparently, Is
making it a fashion, but the men mak-
ing them would find it hard to prove
them. The women of the nation, as a
whole, are as womanly and as whole-
some as they ever were. If the con-
trary were the case, this country would
not to-day bo occupying its proud po-
sition among the nations of the world,
for every nation Is what its women
make it. It is time to call a halt on
these reckless seekers for relief, re-
gardless of truth.
V By Joseph C. Lincoln
Airnio# of 'Capn Chi" "Partnfrs of the Tide'
Capyficitr mo' A & Baxncs as Cohpamr
t * t
One of the teachers In the Vevay
schools the other day asked her class
the origin of the word stateroom, as
applied to berths on steamboats. Not
«ne In the class could answer the
question, and we doubt If there are
many people who could. The word,
says Vevay (Ind.) Itevellle, originated
with the newspapers many years ago.
At that time a magnificent steamer
was built and 35 sleeping rooms were
made alongside the cabin. At that
time there were 35 states In the union,
and a room was named for each state.
Later the state of Texas was added to
the union, and the sleeping apartments
set aside for the officers of the boat
was dubbed "Texas."
Mr. Solomon Pratt began comlcul nar-
ration of story, introducing well-to-do
Nathan ScuddiT of his town, and Kdward
Van Brunt and Martin Hartley, two licb
New Yorkers seeking rest. Because of
latter pair's lavish expenditure of money,
Pratt's first Impression was connected
with lunatics. The arrival of James
Hopper, Van Brunt's valet, gave Pratt
the desired Information about the New
Yorkers. They wished to live what they
termed "The Natural Life." Van Brunt,
It was learned, was the successful suitor
for the hand of Miss Agnes Page, who
gave Hartley up. "The Heavenlles" hear
a long story of the domestic woes of
Mrs. Hannah Jane Purvis, their cook and
maid of all work. Decide to let her go
and engage Sol, Pratt as chef.
"And while we're giving you the
story of our lives, skipper," says Hart-
ley, with one of his half smiles, "I
want to say right here that our pres-
ent surroundings aren't all that fancy
painted 'em. They're too much in the
lime light." This was just one of his
crazy ways of saying things; I was
getting used to 'em a little by now.
"We're too prominent," he says. "The
populace are too friendly and inter-
"Also," says Van, "the select bunch
of feminines from the hotel have
taken to making our front walk a sort
of promenade. Martin and I are natur-
ally shy; we pine for solitude."
There was more of this, but I man-
aged to find out that what they wanted
was a quieter place than Scudder's. A
place off by itself, where they could
be as natural as a picked chicken. I
agreed to try and help 'em find such
a place. And I said, too, that I'd think
about the cooking idea. Money didn't
seem to be no object—I could have my
wages by the hod or barrelful—just as
I see fit.
"Well," says I, getting up to go.
"I'll see. Let me sleep on it for a
spell, same's you fellers have done on
Nate's pin-feather beds. But I ain't
so sure about your staying all sum-
mer. How about that young lady
friend of yours, Mr. Van Brunt? She
may take a notion to send for you to
Introduce her to the king of Chiny
or the grand panjandrum with the lit-
tle round bottom on top. Then you'd
have to pack up and cut your cable."
Van, he looked hard at me for a
minute. I thought first he was mad
at me for putting my oar in where it
wa'n't supposed to be. Then he
laughed. "Sol," says he, "that young
lady and I are kindred spirits. For a
year I'm natural and happy, and she
can nurse her Hooligans and go on
charity sprees. Then—well, then we
fall back on our respected parents and
wedded—er—bliss. Hey, Martin?"
Hartley, in the shadow of the vines,
lit another cigar and nodded. But he
didn't Bay nothing.
For the next three or four days I
chased around trying to find a house
and lot where them Heavenly lunatics
could be natural. I located a couple of
bully summer places, all trees and
windmills and posy beds and hot and
cold water and land knows what. But
they wouldn't do; they "smelled of
coupons," Van said. What they really
wanted, or thought they wanted, was
a state's prison in a desert, 1 Judged.
For a week or ten days we kept the
hunt up, but didn't have no luck.
Whenever I'd think I'd uncovered a
promising outfit the Heavenlies would
turn to and dump in a cargo of objec-
tions and bury it again. After five or
six funerals of this kind I got sort of
tired and quit. It got to be July and
their month at Nate's was 'most over.
I was up there the evening of the third
and I happened to ask 'em if they
wanted me and the sloop for the next
day. There was to be a Fourth of July
celebration over to Eastwich «ud some
of the boarders wanted to go and see
the balloon and the races and the
greased pig chase, and such like. If
the Twins didn't care I'd take the job,
I said. But they took a notion to go
themselves. Van said 'twould be an
excuse for me to give 'em another
chowder, if nothing more. So, on the
morning of the Fourth we started, me
and Van Brunt and Hartley and Lord
James, in .the Dora Bassett. Talk
about cruises. If I'd known—and yet
out of it come—But there! let me tell
you about It.
The Pig Race.
I don't cal'late that I ever had a
better run down the bay than I done
that morning. 'Twas a fair wind, and I I hear it
nnd a pipe in my face—well, all right!
That's my natural life; and I don't
need no book to tell me so, neither.
The Heavenlies enjoyed it, and
they'd ought to. 'Twas clear then,
though it got hazy over to the east'ard
later on. But then, as I say, 'twas
clear, and you could see the schooners 'n sight of the wharf that morning he
strung out on the skyline, some full
up, with their sails shining white in
managed to smile. As for Lord James
he looked at me like I'd trod on the
Blessed if I could see what there
was funny about it. Solon can play
like an Injun. Why, I've seen him
bust two strings at a Thanksgiving
ball and then play "Mrs. McLeod's
Reel"—you know, "Buckshee, nanny-
goat, brown bread and beans"—on
t'other two, till there wa'n't a still foot
in the hall.
We made Eastwich Port about noon
and had dinner. I cooked up a kettle of
chowder—fetched the clams along
with me from home—and 'twould
have done you good to see the Heav-
enlies lay into it. Lord James he
skipped around like a hoppergrass in
a hot skillet, fetching glasses and
laying out nine or ten different kind
of forks and spoons side of each
plate, and opening wine bottles, and
I don't know what all. When he hove
the sun, and others down over the
edge, with only their tops'ls showing.
Far off, but dead ahead, just as if
somebody had dipped their finger in
the bluing bottle and smouched it along
the bottom of the sky, was the Wapa-
tomac shore, and away aft, right over
the stern, was the Trumet lighthouse,
like a white chalk mark on a yellow
fence, the fence being the high sand
bank behind it.
The Twins laid back and soaked in
the scenery. They unbuttoned their
jackets and took long breaths. They
actually forgot to smoke, which was
a sort of miracle, as you might say,
and even Hartley, who had been bluer
than a spoiled mackerel all the morn-
ing, braced up and got real chipper. By
and by they resurrected that book of
was toting a basket pretty nigh as
big as he was. I asked him what it
"Why, the 'amper," says he.
"The which?" says I.
"The lunch 'amper, of course," he
says. "The 'amper for the heatables."
Well, I wondered then what in the
nation was in it, for 'twas heavier
than lead. I remember that the heft
of it made me ask him if he' fetched
along some of the late Hannah Jane's
left-over riz biscuit. But now I see
why 'twas heavy. There was enough
dishes and truck for ten men and the
cook in that basket. We had my
chowder and four kinds of crackers
with It, and chicken and asparagus,
and nine sorts of pickles, and canned
plum pudding with sass, and coffee
and good loud healthy cheese, and red
wine and champagne. When I'd
"The Lunch 'Amper, of Course," He Says.
"The 'Amper for the Heat-
theirs and had what you might call a
Natural Life drunk. I never see print-
ing that went to a person's head the
way that book seemed to go to theirs.
I judged 'twas kind of light and gassy
reading and naturally riz and filled the
empty places same as you'd fill a bal-
Everybody was happy but Lord
James, and I could see that he wa'n't
easy in his mind. He set about amid-
ships of the cockpit and hung onto the
thwart with both hands, like he was
| afraid 'twould bust loose and leave
him adrift. If the Dora Bassett had
struck a derelict or something and
gone down sudden I'll bet they'd have
dredged up that Hopper valet and the
thwart together. And then they'd
have had to pry 'em apart. His lord-
ship wa'n't used to water, unless 'twas
to mix with something else.
By and by Hartley shoves both
hands into his pockets, tilts his hat
back and begins to sing. More effects
of the Natural Life spree, I suppose,
but 'twas bully good singing. Might
have been saying most anything, call-
ing me a short lobster for what I
know, 'cause 'twas some foreigner's
lingo, but the noise was all right even
if I did have to take chances on the
words. I cal'late to know music when
The English suffragettes are now
about to organize a cavalry troop
among themselves, being tired of
walking and believing that when
mounted they will have an advantage
over the police In their suffrage par-
ades, If they don't watch out parlia-
ment and the cabinet will be captured
bodily by these aggressive ladies yet.
A Parisian metallurgical engineer
claims to have perfected a process of
welding copper to steel wire so as to
make a non-corrosive coating.
j a smooth sea, not the slick, greasy
I kind, but with little blue waves cha-
sing each other 'and going "Spat!
| spat!" under the Dora Bassett's quar-
I ter as she danced over 'em. And
that's just what she did—dance. There
wa'n't any hog-wallowing for her; she
just picked up her skirts, so to speak,
and tripped along—towing the little
landing skiff astern of her—like a 16-
year-old girl going to a surprise party.
An early July morning on the bay
down our way Is good enough for
yours truly, Solomon Pratt. Tako It
with the wind and water like I've said;
with the salt smell from the marshes
drifting out from the shore, mixed up
with the smell of the pitch-pines on
♦he bluffs, and me in the stern of a
good boat with the tiller In my hand
Good!" says Van, when his chum
stopped. "Martin, you're better al-
ready. I haven't heard you sing for
two years or more. The last time
was at the Delanceys' 'at home.' Do
you remember the dowager and 'my
daughter?' Heavens! and 'my daugh
ter's' piano playing! Agnes told the
dowager that she had never heard
anything like It. You and she were
together, you know. Give ub another
But Martin wouldn't. Shut up like
a clam and reached into his pocket for
"That was A No. 1, Mr. Hartley,"
says I. "1 wish you could hear Solon
ltassett play the fiddle; you'd appre-
Van he roared and even Hartley
hoisted in enough of everything so
my hatches wouldn't shut tight, and
pulling on one of the Twins' cigars, I
says to Van:
"Mr. Van Brunt," says I, "is this
part of what you call the Natural
"You bet, skipper!" says he. He
hadn't finished the chowder' end of
the layout yet.
Well, I heaved a sigh. 'Twas kind
of unnatural to me, having come on
me all to once; but I eal'lated I could
get used to it in time without shed-
ding no tears. Didn't want to get
used to It too quick, neither;
wanted the novelty to linger along, as
you might say.
When the dinner was over—the
Heavenlies was well enough ac-
quained with the family to nickname
it "lunch"—I started in to help his
lordship wash dishes. The Twins
sprawled themselves under a couple
of pine trees and blew smoke rings.
"Hurry up there, messmate," says
I to the valet; "I want to get through
time enough to run up to the fair
grounds and see that greased pig
Hartley had been keeping so still I
eal'lated he was dropping off to sleep,
but It seems he wa'n't. He set up,
stretched, and got to his feet.
"I'll go with you, skipper," says he.
"Might as well do that as anything.
I've never seen a greased pig race.
They don't have 'em on the Street."
"Chase nothing but lambs there,"
draws Van Brunt, lazy, and with his
eyes half shut. Then he turned over
and looked at his chum.
"Great Caesar! Martin," he says,
"you don't mean to tell me that you're
going up Into that crowd of hayseeds
to hang over a fence and watch some
one run, do you? Why any one on
God's earth should want to run," he
says, "when they can keep still. Is be-
yond me; and why you, of all men,
should want to watch 'em do it—
that's worse yet. Come here nnd be
natural and decent."
But Hartley wouldn't do It. His
blue streak seemed to have struck
again and he was kicking the san"
nervous-like, with his foot.
"Come on, Van," he says. "I want
Not much," says Van. "Walking's
almost as bad as running. I'll be here
when you get back."
It may be that Hartley did want
that walk, same as he said, but he
didn't seem to get much fun out of it.
Went pounding along, his cigar tipped
up to the visor of his cap, and his
eyes staring at the ground all the
time. And he never spoke two words
till we got to the fair grounds.
There was a dickens of a crowd,
five or six hundred. folks, I should
think, and more coming all the time.
Everybody that could come had bor-
rowed the horses and carryalls of
them that couldn't and had brought
their wives and mothers-in-law and
their children's children unto the third
and fourth generation. There was con-
siderable many summer folks—not so
many as there is at the cattle show in
August—but a. good many, just the
same. I counted five automobiles, and
I see the Barry folks from Trumet
riding round in their four-horse coach
and putting on airs enough to make
Hartley gave one lopk around at the
gang and his nose turned up to 12
"Gad!" says he, "this, or something
like it, is what I've been trying to get
away from. Come on, Sol. Let's go
back to the boat."
But I hadn't seen so many shows as
he had and I wanted to stay.
"You wait a spell, Mr. Hartley,"
says I. "Let's cruise round a little
So we went shoving along through
the crowd, getting our toes tramped
on and dodging peddlers and such like
every other minute. There was the
"test-your-strength" machine and the
merry-go-round and the "ossified man"
in a tent: "Walk right up, gents, and
cast your eyes on the greatest marvel
of the age all alive and solid stone
only two nickels a dime ten cents,"
and all the rest of it. Pretty soon
we come to where the feller was sell-
ing the E Pluribus Unum candy—red,
white and blue, and a slab as big as a
brick for a dime.
Hartley stopped and stares at it.
"For heaven's sake!" says he.
"What do they do with that?"
"Do with it?" says I. "Eat it, of
"No?" he says. "Not really?"
"Humph!" I says. "You just wait
There was a little red-headed young-
ster scooting in and out among the
folks' knees and I caught him by the
shoulder. "Hi, Andrew Jackson!"
says I. "Want some candy?"
He looked up at me as pert and
sassy as a blackbird on a scarecrow's
"Bet your natural!" says he. I
"Lord!" says I; "I cal'late he knows
Hartley smiled. "How do they sell
that—that Portland cement?" says he.
"Give me some," he says, holding a
half dollar to the feller behind the oil-
cloth counter. The man chiseled off
enough for a fair-sized tombstone and
handed it out. Hartley passed it to
the boy. He bit off a hunk that made
him look like he had the mumps all
on one side, and commenced to
"There?" says 1. "That's proof
enough, ain't It?"
But he wa'n't satisfied. "Wait a
minute," says he. "I want to see what
it does to him."
Well, it didn't do nothing, apparent-
ly,'except to make the little shaver's
jaws sound like a rock crusher, so we
went on. By and by we come to the
fence alongside of the place where
they had the races. The sack race
was on, half a dozen fellers hopping
around tied up in meal bags, and we
see that. Then Hartley was for going
home again, but I managed to hold
him. The greased pig was the next
number on the dance order and I
wanted to see it.
Maj. Philander Phinney, he's chair-
man of the Eastwich selectmen and
pretty nigh half as big as he thinks
he is; he stood on tip-toe on the
judge's stand and bellered that the
greased pig contest was open to boys
under 15, and that the one that caught
the pig and hung on to it would get
five dollars. In less than three shakes
of a herring's hind leg there was boys
enough on that field to start a reform
school. They ranged all the way from
little chaps who ought to have been
home cutting their milk teeth to
"boys" that had yellow fuzz on their
chins and a plug of chewing tobacco
in their pants' pocket. They fetched
in the pig shut up in a box with laths
over the top. He was little and black
and all shining with grease. Then
they stretched a rope across one end
of the race field and lined up the pig-
chasers behind it.
"Hello!" says Hartley, "there's our
Portland cement youngster. He'll
never run with that marble quarry in-
side of him."
Sure enough, there was the boy that
had tackled the candy. 1 could see
his red head blazing like a lightning
bug alongside of a six-foot Infant with
overalls and a promising crop of side
whiskers. Next thing I knew the
starter—Issachar Tlddit, 'twas—ho
opens the ltd to the pig box and hol-
Tho line dropped. That little lone
pig see 20 odd pulr of hands shooting
towards him. and he fetched a yell
like a tugboat whistle and put down
the field, with the whole crew behind
him. The crowd got on tiptoe and
stretched their necks In see. Every-
body hollered and hurrahed and "haw,
(TO B12 CONTINUED.)
UNITED STATES SENATOR
FROM SOUTH CAROLINA
Ex-Senator M. C. Butler.
Dyspepsia Is Often Caused by Catarrh*
of the Stomach—Peritna Relieves Ca-
tarrh of the Stomach and Is Therefore a
Remedy for Dyspepsia.
Hon. M. C. Butler, U. S. Senator j
from South Carolina for two terms, J
in a letter from "Washington, D. , j
writes to the Peruna Medicine Co., <
"I can recommend Peruna fori
dyspepsia and stomach trouble. IJ
bare been using your medicine fori
a short period and I feel rery much I
relieved. It Is Indeed a wonderful J
medicine, besides a good tonic." I
CATARRH of the stomach is the cor-
rect name for most cases of dyspep-
sia. Only an internal catarrh rem-
edy, such as Peruna, is available.
Peruna Tablets can now be procured.
Ask your Druggist for a Free Peruna
Almanac for 1909.
The Changing Times.
Times have changed since 450 years
sgo, when Halley's comet, for whose
reappearance astronomers are now
looking, was in the heavens. Then the
Christian world prayed to be deliv-
ered from "the devil, the Turk and the
comet." Now it says the devil is not
as black as he has been painted, the
Turk is a negligible quantity and the
comet would be rather welcome than
Important to Mothers.
Examine carefully every bottle of
CASTORIA a safe and sure remedy for
infants and children, and see that it
In TTse For Over JiO Years.
The Kind You Have Always Bought.
Rewards Constantly Paid.
The rewards of great living are not
external things, withheld until the
crowning hour of success arrives;
they come by the way—In the con-
sciousness of growing power and
worth, of duties nobly met, and work
thoroughly done. Joy and peace are
by the way.—Mabie.
With a smooth Iron and Defiance
Starch, you can launder your shirt-
waist just as well at home as the
Bteam laundry can; It will have the
proper stiffness and finish, there will
be less wear and tear of the goods,
and it will be a positive pleasure to
uBe a Starch that does not stick to the
Pity She Couldn't.
" 'I cannot sing the old songs now,'"
she warbled at the piano.
"Then shut up," muttered the old-
fashioned curmudgeon in the corner,
"for the new ones are something
"He caught me in the dark hall last
night and kissed me."
"I guess that will teach him to keep
out of dark halls."—Houston Post.
Truth Is violated by falsehood,
and It may be equally outraged by
Keep It on Hand!
Couaht and colda may aeize any
inrinl^f of (he family any time.
Many a bad enid has been averted
and much nckneaa and Buffering
hftslwrn anved by the prompt us«
of I'iio'i Cure. There is nothing
Ike it to break up coush« and colds.
Ihrre ia no broncliial or lung
trouble that it will not relieve.
Free from opiate* or harmful in-
gredient*. Fine for children.
At all druggiata', 25 eta.
Here’s what’s next.
This issue can be searched. Note: Results may vary based on the legibility of text within the document.
Tools / Downloads
Get a copy of this page or view the extracted text.
Citing and Sharing
Basic information for referencing this web page. We also provide extended guidance on usage rights, references, copying or embedding.
Reference the current page of this Newspaper.
Miller, C. H. The Hennessey Clipper. (Hennessey, Okla.), Vol. 19, No. 32, Ed. 1 Thursday, December 24, 1908, newspaper, December 24, 1908; Hennessey, Oklahoma. (https://gateway.okhistory.org/ark:/67531/metadc105636/m1/2/: accessed September 16, 2021), The Gateway to Oklahoma History, https://gateway.okhistory.org; crediting Oklahoma Historical Society.